A while back, I decided that although my past contains moments that I’d like to change, or do over, I worry about altering my now by altering anything that happened then. Which basically means that I wouldn’t change even the crappiest of the crappy moments or past decisions because somehow, each of them mattered in some way. Each of them led me to Here.
And while Here can be messy and crazy and full of worry and too many toys in my pantry, here is Here, and it’s mine. Ours. Here is where my family is. I guess what I’m saying is that I wouldn’t change anything about the yesterdays because of the todays. And that there’s so much love in the today, even when it’s messy and long, and I find a new blue Crayon mark on my sofa that I swear was not there last week but that my son promises has been there “since he was little.”
So, while I wouldn’t change anything about my past for fear of any changes making my now foreign, there are a few nuggets of wisdom that I wouldn’t have minded having, back then. 12 Things I Wish I Knew Back Then:
- A tan looks great on the young. The after-effects of a tan gotten while young, when you’re now in your 40’s? Not so much.
- Apple wasn’t actually failing as a company during the 80’s or 90’s, and it was the perfect time to purchase their stock, even when your dad tells you wanting to buy stock in order to support a company you love is not a good reason to buy stock. Also? When you figure out that your dad owes you hundreds of thousands of dollars based on following his advice and not buying the stock, he will laugh and say “Too bad it doesn’t really work like that, huh?” So buy the stock. Even when buying it for an emotional reason.
- Trust your gut. Or your heart. Or whatever body part speaks to you. See number two.
- When your baby is a baby, and entering something scary like special needs preschool, crying in the parking lot is absolutely okay. You’re doing the right thing.
- Listen to the people who know more than you do about things. Like special education teachers (see number four) or stock? Wait. Never mind the stock.
- That day at school when you thought you’d die of embarrassment? You won’t actually die, and it will make a great story at a bar in about 15 years. I promise.
- The person who doesn’t love you back doesn’t know shit about shit, and knows even less about you. Let it go. It’s not you.
- Birthdays matter. Celebrations matter. Celebrate them, even when you feel like you’re too old, or too sad, or too whatever. Celebrate. Too many people don’t get the chance to experience another when they desperately wanted to.
- Never start smoking. Really.
- Don’t assume that you’re ever the dumbest person in the room. Even when you’re in a room of experts who are experting on Quantum Physics, I bet that you know something that they don’t.
- Do not ever buy into anything if the reason you’re doing so is to psychologically equalize yourself with anything or anybody. Ever. This is why sociopaths purchase guns. To level the playing field that only they can see. Of course, it’s okay to buy expensive face creams, but do so knowing that they will help, but not stop, the wrinkles. Just saying.
- Say no. Say yes. Say what you mean, and don’t say it for anybody but you. Unless, sometimes, you say it for the sake of a child, or a person who really really needs to hear it. Being true to you is the ultimate though, and say no, or say yes, because it feels right, not because you feel as if you must.
Those are the 12 things that I wish I knew when I was younger, and are the things that I remind myself of today. I’m sure I’m leaving some important ones out, so what are some of the things that you wish you knew, back then or now?
This has been a Finish the Sentence Friday post. Today’s sentence is “I wish I knew…”
Host: Kristi Campbell (me!) from Finding Ninee
Co-hosts: Mardra from Mardra Sikora and Jill from Ripped Jeans and Bifocals