Finding Ninee » Sharing our parenting and special needs stories with heart and humor.

Thankful for the Moments

It’s been almost four years and nine months since Tucker was born.

Tucker Newborn

Early on, I was fearful. Of dropping him, of not being worthy of him, that he might stop breathing, that he was too thin, that he wasn’t sleeping enough, and a thousand other things. I kept track of how often he ate, how much he slept, whether he’d peed enough, and called friends and family to find out whether it was normal for a baby to sleep 16 hours in 24.

Looking back at those early days, I realize how in the moment I always was. Relishing many, but also lonely and unable to see the bigger picture – one that now has become a bit fuzzy. Whereas four years ago, I could tell you to the minute how long Tucker had been awake, now, when people ask when he started napping by himself, I’m a little fuzzy. Funny how perspective works.

As time went on, I became less scared. More secure. I was relieved when the soft spot on his head was no longer soft, and relieved when his neck was strong enough that I no longer had to say “Watch his head!” in a panicked voice.

Sometimes, though, I miss his little baby self. His new baby smell and the weight of him on my chest. His arms are now longer than his entire body was at birth. Missing all of the younger hims, is, I suppose, a common feeling for parents. It also makes makes me realize that while I’m thankful to have the perspective of a larger picture now, that today’s moments will also later be missed.

This weekend, I’ve been resolved to live in each moment. To be thankful for the minutes as well as the months that speed by much too rapidly.

Here are some of those moments. Moments that I’m thankful for, while still in this one.

Moments that I

  1. An Easter Egg Hunt at a friend’s yesterday.

  2. That while Tucker’s words were not understood the girl who was asking him his name and how old he was, that she, and all of the kids, accepted him, and played with him.

  3. His joy, at finding a tiny container of bubbles in a plastic egg.

    Happy Easter Tucker

  4. Tucker doesn’t usually enjoy swinging. He’ll spin around and enjoy it to the point where other people would have fallen sick from the dizziness, but swinging hasn’t ever been one of his favorite things, or even something we bother with at playgrounds. At yesterday’s Easter Egg Hunt, his friend’s two-person swing was something that he really enjoyed. Him wanting to go “faster!” was plain old awesome.

    Tucker swing

  5. Some of the kids wore utterly adorable Easter outfits. Tucker wore his ugly  favorite Spider Man shirt and a pair of sweats. Nobody thought that was weird. Or, if they did, they didn’t say anything about it.

  6. Tucker’s grandparents sent him a cool bike for Christmas. We haven’t put it together, in part because he doesn’t get peddling, and in part because we’ve had 11 snow days and the weather has plain old sucked. It was gorgeous out yesterday, and we assembled the bike. While he still doesn’t get peddling, and claims he is too little to do so, he rocked his cool bike helmet.

    Tucker Bike

  7. Tucker’s excitement at finding a Yoda Easter basket containing a Lego Spiderman by his door this morning. Priceless.

    spiderman lego in easter basket

Happy Easter.
Whether you celebrate Easter, Passover, both, neither, or your own brand of a day full of jelly beans and chocolate, I wish you a day, and life, full of memorable moments.

——

Ten Things of Thankful

Your hosts: A Fly on our (Chicken Coop) Wall, Amycake and the Dude, Considerings, Finding Ninee, Getting Literal, I Want Backsies, Mother of Imperfection, Rewritten, Thankful Me, The Wakefield Doctrine



  • Out One Ear - Linda Atwell - Awesome! You know, I loved every cycle of my kids lives. It’s weird, but when they were babies, I was ready for them to be babies. When they were toddlers, same thing. However, when someone would bring younger (or older) kids over to our house–I sometimes felt a bit overwhelmed because I ended up liking the age my kids were at the moment. Does that make any sense??? I guess what I’m saying is that I was most comfortable with the ages my kids were at any given time and even though I enjoyed them younger (and older), I didn’t want to go back to any of the earlier stages. Somedays I was in a hurry for them to move onto the next stage–well, at least until the mouthy teenage stage came into view. Well, enough of that senseless babble. Happy Easter to you and your family. You’re post is out early! Good for you.April 20, 2014 – 12:56 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Linda,
      I love that you loved every cycle of your kids lives and I totally get that. I guess I’m just not there yet, as Tucker is only 4 1/2. I want to be there though, when I have your perspective, because that’s really the best way to be, right? And it’s totally not senseless babble, it’s perfect. Happy Easter to you and Lindsey and Nick and I so sos so hope Nick is on the mend soon…. xoApril 20, 2014 – 11:21 pmReplyCancel

      • linda Atwell - Out One Ear - I sure hope you knew I was just thinking and writing and not judging in any way shape or form. I know we all have our unique paths in this life and in raising our children and it will be just that: unique for each of us. I applaud your path. You have so much love. I was in such a hurry when my kids were little. I think I liked their new stages because we were working and saving and spending and juggling and life seemed so hectic. I had a business at the time and worked 80+ hours a week–in addition to dealing with Lindsey’s specialness. I don’t think I took as much time as mothers do today. I envy all of you and that you recognize time is precious. Enjoy every single moment. p.s. the last thing I would ever want to do is offend any of my support out there. Not that I think I did, but I sure hope I didn’t. 🙂April 23, 2014 – 1:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah - What a handsome boy and what worthwhile moments! Inspires me to write one in the same theme!April 20, 2014 – 2:43 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - I like the way you worded that! We certainly have our own brand of Passover/Easter/Both/Neither over here. The purists would say we ruin both, but I say we relish both!
    Anyway. I loved this and all of the excitements of one special day.April 20, 2014 – 3:57 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Relishing both is perfect and here are to the excitements of today and every day. To remembering them.April 20, 2014 – 11:48 pmReplyCancel

  • zoe - You gotta love a guy who can rock a spider man shirt at an egg hunt! Why would anyone think that weird? He wasn’t sportin a halloween costume! He is so stinkin cute.. I love the newborn photo… they are perfect then… perfect size, perfect smell, perfect everything… On the dressing thing… my boy wore a bright rubber clown nose and a pair of bright yellow boots over PJ bottoms for almost a month. Insisted on wearing that getup no matter where we went and like you… I pick my battles… I have great photos of him in that nose! I love them! Kind of like what you said about being so aware in the beginning and later…April 20, 2014 – 4:42 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Zoe, I love that your son wore a bright rubber clown nose and yellow boots over PJs. That’s just plain old awesome! And good for you for going with the flow…I so know what you mean about picking your battles!April 21, 2014 – 9:49 amReplyCancel

  • Dana - We just came from Easter dinner with my in-laws, and are heading to my parents for a late Passover sedar. I’m thankful that I can be a part of both families, each with their own traditions. Happy Easter to you Kristi!April 20, 2014 – 4:52 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Happy Easter and Happy Passover, Dana! I love that you get both – that’s perfect and your kids will have their own traditions based on the combination of events that you guys all celebrate now. Pretty awesome, if you ask me!April 21, 2014 – 9:51 amReplyCancel

  • clark - what a an excellent young life form you have there, Mrs. Kristi!

    (you can tell I write compliments a lot… but I suspect that you know that by ‘excellent life form’ you know that I mean, a child that clearly knows how loved he is by his mother and no matter what, that will never change for him (that second part is what I meant by ‘Mrs. Kristi’)

    lolApril 20, 2014 – 6:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi - What a beautiful post. The moments are fleeting, but your child is always your child. I sometimes notice my kids’ younger selves in their grown-up expressions.

    Happy Easter!April 20, 2014 – 6:36 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, I love that you still see the little selves in their grown-up expressions. I sometimes see Tucker’s little baby face in his now, too, which I just love.April 21, 2014 – 10:56 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - What beautiful photos, Kristi, and such beautiful moments to be thankful for. I LOVE the Spider Man thing. Go Tucker! Wouldn’t you rather wear your comfy PJs to a social event? You know you would – I certainly would! If I could get away with PJs at work I’d do it. 🙂April 20, 2014 – 9:13 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Lisa, and yes, I would! In fact, I’m wearing my sweats right now (at home but, still). I wish I could wear PJs to work!April 21, 2014 – 10:57 amReplyCancel

  • Angel The Alien - He’s so cute! Glad he had fun at the Easter party! Time definitely flies with little kids… I’m already finding that with my baby nephew. He lives across the country and I barely get to see him, so when I am with him, I have to treasure every moment and try to get six months worth of love into a couple of days!April 20, 2014 – 10:44 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Angel,
      Bummer that your baby nephew lives across the country but I have no doubt that you do an excellent job of getting six months of love squeezed into a couple of days!April 21, 2014 – 10:58 amReplyCancel

  • Brittnei - Aww! I totally know what you mean about how things have changed! JR just turned 2 almost a week ago and wow he has grown so much! With him being my first like Tucker is your first, I can totally see what you mean about the concern of every tiny thing and each moment being so monumental. I try to hold onto so much of it by writing a letter to him about what he’s up to lately in a blog post each month 🙂 I haven’t been around for a while. We lost our baby so I took some time away to grieve. It’s great to be back and to read what’s new with you at your place. 🙂April 21, 2014 – 3:54 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh Brittnei. I’m so so so sorry that you lost your baby. That’s so hard…I know, because I’ve been there too. There’s really nothing anybody can say to help but please know that I’m thinking of you and sending prayers, peace, and virtual hugs your way.April 21, 2014 – 11:00 amReplyCancel

  • Michele - You are so right – at the beginning, every. moment. matters. And then the blur takes over, and trying to remember what happened yesterday, a week ago, a month ago, seems almost impossible. I love posts like these that help bring me back to the here and now. I’m glad you and Tucker had such a wonderful weekend!April 21, 2014 – 8:48 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Michele, and it’s funny how the blur takes over, isn’t it? We get so caught up in the worry or wonderfulness of the moment, and then, it’s gone.April 21, 2014 – 11:27 amReplyCancel

  • Melanie - Love his joy in those photos! What a cute guy. I feel the exact same way – the first year just flew by with my baby boy and I was SO in the moment, both worrying and enjoying, and now I feel like real life is catching up. Thanks for the reminder to live in and enjoy the moment! Happy Easter!April 21, 2014 – 9:57 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Happy Easter Melanie! And yeah, we really do get so caught up in the worrying and enjoying and then boom! It’s already a new age, with new worries and wonderful moments!April 21, 2014 – 11:29 amReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - First I just have to tell you how much I love the photo of you and Tucker. What a gorgeous moment and you ate glowing. I realize that so many of my blogging friends ate taking real steps to prioritize and take time to enjoy the little moments more. I know I am with you 100%. This post especially made me realize just how fast time is passing and I don’t want to miss the moments. I really, really don’t! Thanks for more perspective, my friend 🙂April 21, 2014 – 10:12 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sandy, time does really pass so quickly, doesn’t it? Sometimes, I feel like I am missing them. Others, I think “oh jeez, three more hours until bedtime? Now what to do??” which is part of why I wanted the reminder to cherish the hours because the year will be over before I’m ready for it. Thank you so much!April 21, 2014 – 2:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Nicole @ Work in Sweats Mama - What a beautiful post, Kristi! Thank you for sharing your memories and the precious moments with your son. I think every mom feels the same. My youngest is turning 2 this Friday, and I’m reeling. It just goes so damn fast! Thanks for the reminder to immerse ourselves in the now. Because it is soooo wonderful!April 21, 2014 – 11:23 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, happy almost second birthday to your youngest, Nicole! It really does go SO fast. And yeah, the now can be pretty dang perfect.April 21, 2014 – 2:58 pmReplyCancel

  • christine - I miss every single age that my kids aren’t in while simultaneously loving the ages they are. Every age has wonderful bits to it. New things are learned, new personality traits emerge, more fun is possible. I do miss them being babies and toddlers, but I don’t want them to go back. I love the ages they are now. Really, I kinda just want to be a Duggar and have every age at the same time. 🙂
    Looks like Tucker had a lot of fun this Easter. Good for you, letting him wear Spider-man.April 21, 2014 – 12:56 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Perfect way to describe it, Christine, missing all of the ages while loving the ones they’re in because you’re right – each age has so much loveliness to it and you are much closer to being a Duggar and having multiple ages than I am! Just saying 😉April 21, 2014 – 3:02 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - That was sweet. Love his morning hair! – And that first picture where he’s obviously smelling the milk 😉April 21, 2014 – 3:12 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I love his morning hair, too, Kenya! Thanks and haha to the first picture.April 21, 2014 – 6:05 pmReplyCancel

  • thedoseofreality - Isn’t it amazing just how totally tuned in we were back in the first days/months? Love this post. Love that he had so much fun at the Easter egg hunt. And his bike is SUPER cool! :)-AshleyApril 22, 2014 – 11:00 amReplyCancel

  • Emily - I too am thankful for the moments, now more than ever. As for Tucker’s smile — adorable and sweet and precious — cherish moment of his beautiful grin!April 22, 2014 – 9:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Gary Sidley - To live in the moment sounds like excellent advice to me; we spend far too much time ruminating about the past, or worrying about the future. Your son looks adorable by the way – although you don’t need me to tell you that!April 23, 2014 – 8:46 amReplyCancel

  • Kerri - I’m glad Boo wasn’t the only one under dressed for Easter. My mom was horrified when we went to her Mass and Boo was in her jeans. The fact that do to my poor packing Abby and I were in flip flops didn’t help my case.

    Oh that look on Tucker’s face on the swing? LOVE IT. Just went back and looked at it (again).

    I adore that kids just get it: acceptance. that we don’t have to say Boo is XYZ they just ask if they want to swing. Simply awesome

    And I promise next time more than 12 hours notice that I will be within driving distance 🙂April 23, 2014 – 12:31 pmReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - Hey, what he wants to wear he is going to wear. Kids have a sense of cool that must be upheld no matter how weird. My kid wears toques and sunglasses…together…even on cloudy days.
    And spider man is always cool.April 23, 2014 – 1:32 pmReplyCancel

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