Finding Ninee » Sharing our parenting and special needs stories with heart and humor.

Use the buddy system

Finish the Sentence Friday

Hi, friends!  It’s finish the sentence Friday time and this week’s sentence is “Speaking from experience, I’m going to give you a little advice on…”

Life.  I’m going to give you some advice on life, because I’m old.

1. Wear sunscreen.  Seriously.  If I could trade every tan I’ve ever had for less freckles, wrinkles and discolored skin?  The tans weren’t worth it.  I promise.

2. Take care of your teeth.  I’ve spent more money on one of my molars than my first two cars.  Combined.

Ok, that’s it!  That’s all I’ve got.  44 years and all I can tell you is to wear sunscreen and take care of your teeth.

You’re welcome.

Wait, you want more?  Life-sucking vampires!  (not really because you guys are awesome)

I’m going to give you a little advice on keeping track of your drunk friends at a work party. Use the buddy system.

Here’s why.  I won’t bore you with the details but picture 150 drunk work friends in New Orleans.  I know, right?  Lots of cool stuff happens in New Orleans!

Huge par-tay.  Drinks.  A balcony.  When I looked up and saw this:

ViewFrBalcony

So off we went.  Me, Pete, and Mark.*

It was not, in fact, a live sex show but a solitary saggy old stripper swaying to Bon Jovi.

SaggyStripperWithNippleRings_edited-1

Luckily, she had pretty, sparkly nipple rings, because otherwise, b-o-r-i-n-g.  To prove that I wasn’t totally freaked out and that I’m actually cool rather than just pretending to be, we sat down and ordered a drink.

Drink_edited-1

Finally, it was time to go.  And Pete was gone.

We looked for him, which meant wandering around the “club” finding a nasty room in the back that had only a couch in it (shudder), called him, texted him and eventually said fuck it, I’m tired assumed he must have gone back to the hotel.

I was worried when Pete wasn’t at the meeting the next morning.  He NeedFoodshowed up around noon and told us what had happened.  While I was peacefully slumbering, Pete was having an adventure.

Apparently, he was drunk enough to think it’d be easy to find food at 2am and sought out to find some, thinking the magical hotdog man would be waiting just outside and that he’d be back in just a minute. He was wrong.  This is his story.

He wandered around for a bit, searching for the elusive street vendors and decided he was tired, and that he could take a little rest.  And so he sat down.  On somebody’s doorstep.

Steps

He was probably pretty comfortable.  Until he woke up, at least.  The woman who owned said doorstep was not impressed and beat him with a broom until he shuffled on his way.

StepBroom_edited-1

He apologized, got up, and got lost.  Luckily, a different woman drove by and asked if he wanted a ride.  He gratefully accepted and thought to himself “what kind folks live in New Orleans, willing to help out a lost tourist at 4am.”

Car

He gratefully accepted a ride from this kind stranger.  

CarBack1CarBack2

There was a little bit of confusion.  

CarBack3

Eventually, they got on the same page and, using teamwork, decided that it would be best if he got out of the car.

CarBack4

Because he still couldn’t find the hotel, he decided to rest on a park bench until the sun came out and he could find a taxi.

ParkBench

It wasn’t until the next morning that he realized he was already at the hotel.  In the courtyard.  Which is why my advice is to use the buddy system when drinking in New Orleans with a bunch of coworkers who will leave you behind in order to get some rest.  Using the buddy system could end up saving your dignity.  Just ask Pete.

*Pete and Mark are not their real names.  I changed them to protect Pete’s stupidity innocence.

Note:  Robert walked in the room when I was almost done drawing my sweet saggy stripper friend and didn’t even ask.  I think he’s getting immune to me.

Finish the Sentence Friday is hosted by:

Dawn’s Disaster (Twitter, Facebook)
Next week’s sentence is  “You want to know what I think of social media? I think…”


  • Janine Huldie - I think the buddy system sounds like a great idea and especially after seeing your kick ass pictures here. You totally swayed me, Kristi!! Seriously, i never tire of your artowkr and please keep them coming!! 🙂 Great job as always and thank you again for linking up with us!!!February 23, 2013 – 8:15 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Thanks for hosting, Janine! Always such a fun thing to read everybody’s entries.
      Glad you know to always use the buddy system. It’s an important life lesson. You should probably start teaching your kids, now. 😉February 23, 2013 – 9:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Sara - Buddy system is smart (you are wise). Otherwise, if you don’t have the buddy system, and your friend goes to bed, you could get tossed into a pool, fully dressed, by a bunch of drunk coworkers and wind up with a few cracked ribs. I’ve heard that a hangover is MISERY with cracked ribs (esp. if your well-rested friend tells lots of hilarious jokes that it hurts to much to laugh at).

    So thank you, again, for sharing your vast wisdom.
    (Maybe Robert thought you were working on a belated Valentine’s card for him and he didn’t want to spoil the surprise. He’s probably frantic with anticipation. Maybe you should draw a little something for him…..)February 23, 2013 – 8:59 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Sara! I so was going to the Greece trip when I got thrown in the pool but then it ended up being too many drawings, and too much advice. I have to dispense my wisdom in nuggets, lest it becomes too large and therefore a choking hazard. Because choking would be bad.

      And SNORT to Robert thinking I was working on a belated Valentine’s card for him. God, I’m a horrible wife and need to draw something for him, like, NOW. Phew. Thanks for the insight! And here I thought he was just unsurprisable any more. What? That’s TOTALLY a word.February 23, 2013 – 9:45 pmReplyCancel

      • sara - Can’t tell you how many times I’ve choked on wisdom. Thanks for looking out for me.

        I suspect Robert may be so quiet b/c he’s choking back his disappointment at not getting more drawings from you. Robert LOVES your drawings.

        You’re becoming quite the Anti-Choking Advocate. Who knew?February 23, 2013 – 10:04 pmReplyCancel

      • Julie - Ha! Good stuff. I’m drinking my caviar of hope (Kronenbourg 1664), in front of the fire while the girls light hundreds of candles in the other room. But don’t worry, they are using the buddy system. 🙂February 23, 2013 – 10:04 pmReplyCancel

        • admin - ha, ha! Loved that email and “flagged” it to reply to when I could properly be funny! Caviar of Hope is never bad. No matter how it came about. Glad the fire starters are using the the buddy system!February 24, 2013 – 12:50 amReplyCancel

  • Jennifer P. - You are so funny! And brilliant and funny and I’m glad I know about the buddy system now.February 23, 2013 – 10:00 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Thanks, Jennifer. And yes, the buddy system is super important!February 23, 2013 – 11:43 pmReplyCancel

  • Josie Bisett - LMFAO!!! Haha, been a while since I lmfao-ed for anyone!!! That saggy stripper drawing is some of your finest work I’ve seen 🙂 I was actually lucky enough to see a real live sex show in Amsterdam. I can’t believe I haven’t blogged about that yet…..!February 23, 2013 – 10:32 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Really? You haven’t LMAFO in a while? Dude. I’m HONORED. Saggy stripper is going to become a long-time friend. I can feel it. She might have to be on Robert’s delayed Valentine drawing, as Sara suggested. Poor Robert.
      And um, hello! Time to blog about the Amsterdam show! Oh. Sorry. Except you can’t because you are crazy and gave up blogging for lent. Er. Can’t wait to read that stuff!February 23, 2013 – 11:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Stephanie @ Mommy, for real. - It is seriously fantastic that you started with advice on protecting one’s skin and teeth and then immediately blasted us with that awesome nipple-ringed Bon Jovi stripper picture. I for one, think it is well worth the time you spent to link up at the last minute, and yours is definitely the most memorable post…isn’t it great to have memories of crazy/fun/perhaps slightly dangerous things we did before we were parents? I fucking love New Orleans. I also love that when I type “F” into my browser, your blog comes up automatically.February 23, 2013 – 10:53 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Protecting one’s skin and teeth is super important. It’s a community service message, really. Totally last minute, friend, totally…pounded out those dumbass drawings and words which I’m sure I’ll edit because well, I need to, (later) but I was freaked out I’d miss the FTSF deadline! Didn’t start until Saturday at 5:30pm and posted at 8pm? Bad for business.
      I fucking love New Orleans, too. But more? I hugely love that you type “F” into your browser and get moi.
      LOVES
      <3February 23, 2013 – 11:48 pmReplyCancel

  • Rich Rumple - I love your brain! This is hilarious! Not only was the story something that was believable, but the artwork made South Park’s look sick (cough, cough … flu bug time). It reminds me of when I was in Naples, Italy with a friend, who was looking for a little “company”. He saw what he wanted, went upstairs, and for a few minutes all was quiet. (I was waiting at the bottom of the stairs, if you needed to know.) Next thing I know, I’m hearing a, “God Damn!”, much thumping, and the door is thrown open with Bobby running down the steps, carrying most of his clothes. “Rich, that was a guy, Rich, that was a guy!” I never let him live it down. lol Great Job!February 23, 2013 – 11:52 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - OMG that’s awesome. That’s even better than my friend “Pete,” who was never really sure about “you know.” To this day, he claims that it was just a friendly misunderstanding between a hooker and a lost tourist. 🙂 thanks for the comment!!February 23, 2013 – 11:55 pmReplyCancel

      • admin - And PS – TOTALLY TRUE STORY. No exaggeration needed. This time, anyway 😉February 23, 2013 – 11:56 pmReplyCancel

  • Michelle Liew - Wow. I love your art, Kristi, and yes, am in total agreement that we should have a buddy system! Thanks for the sharing!February 24, 2013 – 8:18 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Thanks for the comment, Michelle! Buddy systems are good for pretty much everything, I think!February 24, 2013 – 3:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerri - First vampires and now sex shows in New Orleans? Next time I travel there you can be my tour guide.February 24, 2013 – 10:03 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Kerri, you’ve got it! New Orleans is awesome. Keep in mind, these two trips happened about 20 years apart from one another, so it’s not really like I live the exciting life it seems I do from this blog. Especially since having Tucker. 😀 I mean, it’s totally awesome and exciting watching him grow and develop, but I can’t think of a single funny story that involves alcohol since then.February 24, 2013 – 3:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Rachel - Wow, such realistic renderings (not that I would know from personal experience). I like how you turned the prompt into its own cautionary tale. Like an Aesop’s Fable on alcohol.February 24, 2013 – 1:23 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Hehe, thanks, Rachel! Yes, people need to be wary of how much they drink. Especially if they’re counting on tired friends like me to save them, because I’d rather just go back to the hotel and get some sleep. Too bad he wasn’t wearing one of those head cameras!February 24, 2013 – 3:43 pmReplyCancel

  • Mama Meerkat - Oh man, what a night! The closest I have is when I was in high school and rode the bus to school, we drove by a prostitute getting arrested early in the morning…

    But the advice about teeth and sunscreen is pretty solid.February 24, 2013 – 2:38 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Thanks, Mama Meerkat. Watching a prostitute get arrested is pretty big. I can’t say I’ve seen that! And yeah, teeth and skin. So easily forgotten.February 24, 2013 – 3:44 pmReplyCancel

  • clark - First visit to your blog (curtsey of Janine, Kate, Stephanie and Dawn and them) and their FTSF series.
    Where is the subscribe button? I liked your Post. I laughed at the ‘story’. I envied your combining of graphic and drawings and all.
    Very fun.
    I will be returning to this here blog here.

    (you think the brothels of the Middle Ages had, like, out-of-work musicians playing Bach tunes are accompaniment for the …er working girls?)February 24, 2013 – 5:03 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Hi Clark,
      So glad you linked up with FTSF. Thanks for the comment. You should be able to subscribe either from the home page (right hand column there is a subscribe button) or on the main navigation bar, there’s a subscribe just to the right of “Home.”
      Haha about the brothels of the Middle Ages! I’ll bet they did! Those poor out-of-work musicians!February 25, 2013 – 8:05 pmReplyCancel

  • Cyndi - These photos are great! What a story! Yes, the buddy system is good. Anywhere. LOLFebruary 25, 2013 – 10:03 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - True, buddy system should be a universal rule for everything. Thanks!February 28, 2013 – 8:27 amReplyCancel

  • Kate Hall - That is hilarious!!! I can’t believe that happened to him and then to end up right in the hotel courtyard. So funny! Love the pics! The last one is perfect. The saggy boobs are N-A-S-T-Y. I would have been disturbed seeing that. Great story!February 25, 2013 – 11:47 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - I know, he’s a moron! Thanks Kate 🙂February 28, 2013 – 8:27 amReplyCancel

  • mombo - not that I’ve “been there, done that….” …. at least, I don’t think so…..
    too funny, tooo tooooo funny! drawings are the pleasure of it all xoxoFebruary 27, 2013 – 11:47 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Better that you don’t remember if you have “been there!” I think 🙂February 28, 2013 – 8:26 amReplyCancel

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