Finding Ninee » Sharing our parenting and special needs stories with heart and humor.

“Buh-bye!” I smiled at my step-daughter. “That was so adorable,” she said. “He said bye-bye! Was that his first?” “No,” I said. I didn’t add that I’d only heard him say it once before, to a toy garbage truck driver, heading to unknown dumps and mysteries around the bend of kitchen cabinets. She closed the […]

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  • JT Walters - DeVos is from my home town and I could not agree with you more. She is a Bush puppet and common chore $&ore.

    Queen of Amway profiteering, those who helped Trump get elected are profoundly disappointed with this choice. But she bought the job just like the rest of them do. Same old same old!

    You and I rarely agree on politics but we do tonight 1000% which is nice for a change.January 19, 2017 – 11:51 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - She’s AWFUL! OMG Grizzlies??!?!?! What a dumb ass. I’m glad we agree!January 20, 2017 – 6:56 pmReplyCancel

  • JT Walters - PS

    Don’t toss ur Mickey wine glass over this!January 19, 2017 – 11:58 pmReplyCancel

  • [email protected] - I had never heard of her until she was nominated. I have been doing some research, but everything is so skewed in one direction or the other it is hard to sort out the facts. I am a public school baby from a family of public school educators. It was very hard for me to pull my girls out and go private a couple years ago – went against every ounce of my soul. BUT, we did it because I believe there are some serious problems with the current public school system – definitely some good, but definitely some problems. (Many of those problems are on a state lever.) All that being said, I am not sure she is the right person for the job.January 20, 2017 – 9:11 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I hadn’t ever heard of her either and know what you mean about news sites being skewed one way or another. For me, I just watched the video of her answering and that’s what I base my opinion on. She was very obviously unfamiliar with IDEA. I also don’t like that she’s donated to discriminatory causes.January 20, 2017 – 6:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Deenie - Hey – I am with you 100%. When I was a kid there were NO kids with disabilities in my class. Not kids with diagnoses or kids getting extra help anyway. Now, 1 of my sons has an IEP and the other has a 504 and they are both in our local public schools in general ed classrooms and are fully welcomed and supported there by both staff and students alike. Yesterday I went to pick up my autistic son from school and I walked in to see him and another non-SpEd kid finishing up a scooter race. They were laughing and talking. This is as important to me as the grades he gets. This is only possible because of IDEA. Anyhoo – I too live in VA and I too am planning to march tomorrow. I’m not with any group. It would just be me and my wife. (Not only do we have SpEd kids, but we’re black and I’m an immigrant and we’re a same sex couple.) I have to march, even though, like you, I am scared.January 20, 2017 – 9:25 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hi Deenie, I’m glad your sons are in classrooms that welcome and support them. I know that’s not the case for all but we’ve been really lucky with our programs here. I’m not with a group either – some friends of mine are going but nobody who lives near me and I think trying to meet up downtown is going to be really difficult. I’m glad you’re marching with your wife! PM me on FB or email me if you want to try and meet if you all want another person with you!January 20, 2017 – 7:02 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - You shouldn’t feel the need to apologize for a post that’s more angry than political…it’s ok and I get it! I’m worried, but I’m trying to be optimistic, because I’m not sure what else to do…January 20, 2017 – 9:35 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Emily. I’m trying to be optimistic too. We’ll see… *sobs*January 20, 2017 – 7:09 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - I just watched the inauguration, and watched Trump sign his nomination for DeVos and say “Betsy..education, right?” He doesn’t even know or care.

    I am not marching in D.C., but I am marching in my own home. If you are, be safe, Kristi.January 20, 2017 – 1:34 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks Dana. I’m going to go but I’m meeting somebody so I’m not alone (because chicken). I’ll think of you marching at home and UGH “Betsy…education, right?” WHAT A DISGUSTING GROSS UGH!!!!!January 20, 2017 – 7:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Rabia @ The Liebers - My head is spinning with all that is wrong with him, his administration, and people in general. I really am scared for our country right now!January 20, 2017 – 1:46 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m really scared for our country too. It’s truly unbelievable what he’s already doing. The people he’s nominating. All of it. Sigh.January 20, 2017 – 7:35 pmReplyCancel

  • Bev - Oh, I feel you. Having worked in special education, and hoping to enroll my daughter in an integrated public preschool program this fall, I know how important IDEA is for children, ALL children, but obviously for the children who it is supposed to serve. It angers me that the woman in charge of it doesn’t even seem to know what it is. It’s just disgusting and infuriating.January 20, 2017 – 2:57 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - It’s SO disgusting and infuriating, Bev. I just don’t even know what to say about it other than it’s just not right, and can’t happen. How is this happening? Sigh.January 20, 2017 – 7:39 pmReplyCancel

  • Linda Atwell - Out One Ear - Kristi: I so wish I could be at the march tomorrow but we are in Mexico till 2/4 so I will miss out. Surprisingly, there is a march in the little town where I’m staying. So I feel that we are all united in our efforts to let this orange cheeto know that we are not with him. I feel helpless, hopeless today. I also suffered from the sh*ts and had to go to the local hospital to be rehydrated. Of course, I believe my condition is fro the thought of this horrible creature running our country. The locals are appalled that he won the election. I could go on and on, but if I were going to the march, I would hope it would remain peaceful and without any violence whatsoever. I will be thinking about you tomorrow. Be safe. Be strong. Stand up for what is right and I’ll be cheering for you my friend. Hugs, hugs, hugs.January 20, 2017 – 10:47 pmReplyCancel

It was my first real slumber party. Popular girls would be there, so I shaved my legs. I got out of the shower and saw I’d missed shaving an entire line of hair along my shin. “You’re such a baby,” I said and razored off the offensive line of yellow fuzz along with much of […]

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  • Dana - I wish we lived closer, Kristi. I find in person friendships easier than online, although I do love the connection I’ve made with bloggers. But I’d rather be sitting across from you, eating lunch and chatting. I was a late bloomer in terms of friends; I have much closer relationships now than I did as a teenager.January 12, 2017 – 10:12 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dana!!! I so wish we lived closer. I think I suck maybe at the in-person ones. Maybe because they have 7yo boys or girls and they are like 37? Maybe because Tux is “like a 50’s boy,” from a mom in his class? Maybe because I just totally suck at this? Honestly, I try to not suck at this but do. I need to take lessons from you. Maybe we could have a game night or something? Seriously.January 12, 2017 – 10:26 pmReplyCancel

  • JT Walters - I think all writers are confirmed introverts hence making online friendships easier than IRL. You are my only Ionline friend I met IRL.

    Yes, I think writers understand each other better then most people even bad ones like me. Just like teachers or doctors understand each other better because they can empathesize.

    Eyebrows dude! Penciled in and it rained. Far more horrifying and traumatic until my younger brother did it….permanent marker holds up better!!

    As for what I do when I can not sleep the answer is obvious. I write.January 12, 2017 – 10:37 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - YIKES to the eyebrows!! And yeah, you may be onto something with the whole shared connections and empathy thing.January 13, 2017 – 8:18 pmReplyCancel

  • Lux G. - Beautiful place to be with friends.January 12, 2017 – 11:14 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - I love “snow that sparkles under the sun: so much, as a line, from this post Kristi.
    I suck at making friends. I have lost a few friendships that I regret, but had a lovely time with a friend visiting from far away, during the holidays. I just wish she didn’t live so far away.January 12, 2017 – 11:21 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thank you Kerry!!! I have a hard time with the losing friendships thing, even when it’s just distance or worlds drifting or whatever — it’s still weird and hard. I’m glad you had a great time with a far-away friend recently though. Those moments fill our buckets for sure.January 13, 2017 – 8:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - I think about friendships too and how they evolve over time. I have friends from elementary school, high school and college so yes, shared history there. But, I also have newer “mom friends” that I’ve made over the last 15 years and of course there are my blogging friends like you. 🙂 I know for me, as a writer, I do tend to be open through my writing and therefore connect with people online and I think it feels safer to share that way, at least initially. That being said, I’d LOVE to meet you IRL one of these days!January 13, 2017 – 8:31 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Emily we HAVE TO MEET IRL. We have to. I don’t really have any friends from elementary or high school, not really. I’m friends with a couple HS people on FB but don’t really see them. I wish I did. I think it’s easier to be open in writing for sure. One of the dudes must have a DC visit at some point right??/January 13, 2017 – 8:31 pmReplyCancel

      • Emily - Maybe when Middle Dude starts looking at colleges next year…I’ll demand that he visit GW and Georgetown! 🙂January 14, 2017 – 11:01 amReplyCancel

  • Allison Smith - I am very curious about this dry cold? And I know what you mean about old friends. It’s the share history, not the geography. I feel the same way about my peeps in Florida. Have you tried inviting the bus stop moms over for wine?January 13, 2017 – 10:42 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dry cold is WAYYYYY better. Meet me in Colorado in the winter, and I’ll show you? I haven’t really invited the moms for wine… it felt easier before kids maybe?? Or maybe I’m just a big fat wimp.January 13, 2017 – 8:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Rabia @ The Liebers - I definitely find friendships online are easier. IRL you have to find kids you can stand who have parents you can stand and then hope that the kids like each other. There’s just too many variables!!January 13, 2017 – 3:28 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Phew! I’m glad it’s not just me and you’re so right about liking the kids, them like each other… gah. So much work.January 13, 2017 – 8:33 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sometimes I just wonder at how easy it is with some people and how it feels harder with others. I don’t know if it’s just the daily distractions or not having time alone (without kids) or what…January 15, 2017 – 8:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Yvonne - Kristi, I love all your posts, but I really, really love this one. I read it a couple of days ago on my phone and waited till I was at my desktop to comment (the speed I type on my phone I’d still be writing a comment if I’d tried it two days ago! 🙂 )

    I love the way you’ve woven the strands of past and present into this, and I loved the story about your first slumber party. I never really went to one of those, but because I grew up on an island we had to go away to school from age 14 and we used to have parties after “lights out.” Sometimes the matron caught us and we got banned from going out after school for a week or so. But the parties were fun while they lasted. One girl escaped punishment because she hid in a wardrobe!

    As to your questions about friendship. I have a mix of both. I have some friends I met online and then in person and some I met in person and keep in touch with online. One of my best friends moved to Australia so we keep in touch via Skype. I don’t think how easy a friendship is has to do with on or off line so much as with how much you relate to each other and how open and honest you are with each other. It’s possible in both situations to put on a “face” which will always end up feeling fake.

    I also think that when we feel like an outsider (like you do at the bus stop) that we tend to be more reticent and so it’s a bit of a vicious circle. I can be like that at times both on and off line and it’s not helpful really. Some friends and I were talking about our kids who at the time felt excluded from the “popular” crowd and one friend had read about how even the “popular” kids feel that they are not as popular as someone else in their group. So it’s just a universal feeling.January 15, 2017 – 10:39 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yvonne, I think you’re onto something with friendship having a lot to do with how open and honest we are with one another. Maybe that’s the piece I’m looking for when examining “mom friendships.” So often, kids are there and it’s just not the same as a slumber party or anything really where there’s soul-bearing and honesty happening.
      I do know too that it’s true that popular kids don’t feel as popular as they are… and that others are “more in” as well. Thanks so much for your thoughtful comment!January 15, 2017 – 8:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - I remember hating slumber parties for loads of reasons. And yet turning down the invite was unheard of, so I’d go and try to make the best of it. I hated when girls would get into scary shit. Awful.
    I dread the day slumber parties start with Zilla, especially since she has such particular sleeping needs and habits. I’ve also done a bunch of reading about how negatively kids are affected by sleepovers. Fascinating. Eh…maybe she won’t be interested. Fingers crossed.January 15, 2017 – 9:21 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’ve worried about Tucker, too. He still wears pull-ups at night (Shhhhhh) and I know that might become an issue. That, and that twice/week, he comes to get me at 1am or 3am or 5am because dreams. I can’t imagine him being somewhere else for that part, scared and too shy to say anything about it. Gah. I actually loved Light as a Feather, Stiff as a Board… but some of the other stuff? Ok I maybe liked that too. But not the getting in trouble stuff. That was saved until later.January 15, 2017 – 9:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia @ Menopausal Mother - I’m very close to my online friends—especially the writers. I think this is due to many factors—we share writing and being parents, and we all seem to “get” one another on a level that is quite different than the relationships that I have with my IRL friends. Either way, I’m so grateful to have them!January 16, 2017 – 9:33 pmReplyCancel

It’s almost 2017, and part of me is broken. I look at life and prejudice and hate and rape culture and Aleppo and feel sadness that even the best of hugs and cheesiest of nachos can’t fully defrost. I want to stop watching the news but it’s everywhere. There’s hate on Twitter and Facebook and […]

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  • Emily - Images of Aleppo have been on my mind as well…it’s so awful and truly unbelievable that this is happening on our planet. But, I’m glad you also mentioned the happiness of Tucker and Santa and believing and nachos and burgers, because that good stuff is what keeps us all going in the right direction.December 15, 2016 – 9:51 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Emily, It’s SO awful. It’s so awful and I can’t stop thinking about it. And yeah, Santa and nachos. Those are happy things. And burgers. MMM.December 16, 2016 – 6:16 pmReplyCancel

  • JT Walters - ❤️❤️❤️The picture of Tucker in the Santa hat. It is so Tucker. 2017 I proclaim as our year!

    I think the world is what ordinary people make of it. I plan on it being an extraordinary year.

    Every year Alex surprises me with something new. Tucker will do the same.

    Time is stealing your baby away as it does to all of us. Thomas Acquinas to throw a flag on this blog because you can only have two consciousness of time without sacrificing the third. Think it terms of past, present and future, you sacrifice your present and future.

    What is guaranteed is today. Enjoy every minute you have with Tucker. It pays off in dividends for both you and him.

    So Tucker has a crush on a girl at school??December 15, 2016 – 9:58 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I know…I love that photo of Tucker in the Santa hat. It’s in a Christmas ornament that I keep on my desk all year long! And yeah, I’m enjoying every moment with him for sure. Well, most of them. And he’s got several crushes as far as I know. <3December 16, 2016 – 6:17 pmReplyCancel

  • Crystal - There really is so much, too much ugliness in the world, sometimes I think I forget to look for the good stuff, and there really is good stuff. So much of it surrounds me, right here in my home and reading about your little man just now made me think about it. I needed to think about it tonight . . .December 15, 2016 – 10:11 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, I’m glad you thought about it Crystal. It’s there, in the little things. Hugs to you!December 16, 2016 – 6:18 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - I don’t see the images but I feel them. My heart hurts. My chronic physical pain and my psychological pain for this world often blend together and my empathetic muscle aches. I do love how you described romantic love to Tucker though. Brilliant.
    I have to believe that the future and 2017 will contain so many unknown, beautiful things. I just have to.December 16, 2016 – 1:21 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I have to believe that the future holds unexpected loveliness too Kerry. I have to. Here’s to believing together.December 16, 2016 – 6:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - 2017 will be filled with dark and light, you are right. I need to be reminded of the light sometimes, because the dark seems so big and scary.

    I love your personification of the Future – is it wrong that I imagine him as the troll who sits under the bridge?December 16, 2016 – 3:53 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - It’s hard to remember sometimes though, right? LOL I love that you picture the Future as the troll under the bridge. Not wrong at all!December 16, 2016 – 6:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Nina - You explained well what’s on the mind of so many– how hard it is to balance knowledge of all the terrible things with living our day to day lives and still experiencing and appreciating joy. So tricky.December 18, 2016 – 9:29 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - The whole experiencing joy while experiencing horror and grief is hard, but maybe necessary, right?December 18, 2016 – 7:13 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - The whole experiencing joy while experiencing horror and grief is hard, but maybe necessary to keep on keeping on I suppose. Thank you!December 20, 2016 – 7:16 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie G smith - I think you should share this with that mom…Just saying. I’m definitely ready for 2017. And I think it’s sad that being sweet and pure reminds people of the 1950s. Hunter’s like that, too. I love it.December 19, 2016 – 2:43 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I get so lame and shy about sharing. Ugh. I think it’s sad, too, that being sweet and naive reminds people of the 50’s. So much love and Merry Holidays to you and yours, Allie! (We just had photos taken on Sunday… can you say BEHIND??).December 20, 2016 – 7:38 pmReplyCancel

  • My Inner Chick - **2017 will be filled with grief and despair, and we know this. It will also be filled with milestones, light, magic**

    Kristi, you feel SO DEEPLY, so strongly. I believe this is the reason I hear your heartbeat.

    Tucker is beautiful & so are you.

    Much Love flowing from COoold Minnesota.

    xxxxx MERRY CHRISTMAS.December 21, 2016 – 7:57 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I hear and love your heartbeat right back (and that saying is fabulous). xoxo and much love from not-a-white-Christmas-in-DC <3December 22, 2016 – 7:25 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @TheGoldenSpoons - My oh-so-independent 14 year old daughter vows that she will never get married because she can take care of herself and doesn’t need to be dependent on a guy. The thought of her never getting married makes me almost as sad as the thought of her getting married! 🙂 My Facebook memories one the last week have been like heart daggers – all the pictures from Christmases past with little girls who still had magic in their eyes. I miss that past but just as much I look forward to the future.December 27, 2016 – 3:26 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - This watching the growing up thing is amazing, huh? It’s painful and wonderful and just wow. Awww to your FB memories. I haven’t been on much – I’ll have to go see which you shared. I got one of Tucker two years ago singing part of 12 Days of Christmas and OHHHH, wow.December 28, 2016 – 7:05 pmReplyCancel

  • Linda Atwell - Out One Ear - Sweet. That is all I can say about this. Sweet. Except that Tucker is now up to your armpit and it won’t be long till he is taller than that. I think, in these troubling times, the best thing to do is enjoy all the sweetness. Hugs to you, my friend. And, Happy New Year!December 28, 2016 – 9:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - He’s so big, and it is so right and also so much sooner than I’d planned on, looking back at the boring days of “It’s 3pm and I will NEVER make it until tonight” times. Happy happy New Year to you, too, filled with a bajillion hugs and so much love and sweetness.December 28, 2016 – 10:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Echo - I try so hard to shelter myself from the shit storm out there, because I have a hard enough time with the one that is happening in my head.

    Yes, we are on borrowed time. Yes, our boys are naive about things. Yes, my 10 year old still believes in Santa and even though he drives me INSANE, people tell me he is the sweetest, kindest, gracious and most charming child ever. So, if he can act that way in public, I must be doing something right, right? RIGHT?!

    Anyway, I decided to on guarantees in 2017 because the could be’s are too much to bare.December 29, 2016 – 10:41 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You are doing so much right Echo! Here’s to charming, kind, sweet and awesome kids and to the shit storms in our heads calming down this year. Or something. And whiskey in a jar.January 4, 2017 – 1:37 pmReplyCancel

  • Just Call Me Jane - You have such a beautiful way with words, Kristi. I love the sweet way Tucker declared his love for you. Wishing you a peaceful 2017.December 31, 2016 – 8:54 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thank you Jane! I really appreciate it and wish you a peaceful and wonderful 2017.January 4, 2017 – 1:37 pmReplyCancel

  • Yvonne - As always this is lovely, particularly when you write about Tucker and his young wisdom! It’s wonderful to see how he is growing – not just growing up but growing into himself.
    And yes, there’s a shit storm, or many shit storms our there in the world right now, but we can get through them and come out stronger. We are a huge mix of everything you describe and more, and if we adults can listen enough to the children, they just might show us how.January 1, 2017 – 4:39 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I like your idea of listening to the children, Yvonne. Mine sure is wise when it comes to magic and wonder. Happy 2017 – I hope it’s a year of unexpected greatness.January 4, 2017 – 2:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Louise - What a beautiful post to reflect on things past and present with. While I know 2017 will bring a mix of good and not so good to both mine and the world I look forward with hope. Happy New Year to you and yours as well!

    And I love the bit about at age 7 they being still more yours than the world. I feel the same. Growing independence, but still so lovingly mine 🙂January 3, 2017 – 3:25 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Age 7 is a good one, right? I love it and try to remember that each age will have its own magic because if not I get sad that the time is going way too fast! Here’s to 2017 being full of hope and love and better than we think it might be!January 4, 2017 – 2:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia @ Menopausal Mother - I would love to see all the negativity disappear off social media. Less hate-filled status updates and more animal or cute little kid memes for 2017!!! Hey—Sorry it has taken me so long to get back over here to leave a comment—-I was completely swallowed up by the holidays!!January 4, 2017 – 12:30 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hi Marcia! Happy 2017! And yes, less hate-filled crap on social media. That would be amazing. Now I need to go find some cute kid and animal memes!January 4, 2017 – 2:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Ironically I just looked at the title of my first post from last year and it was “Facebook Won’t Get the Best of Me this Year”. That was the beginning of one of many facebook hiatuses. I might take another one before January 20th.

    Anyway…..

    Love that picture of Tucker and I love how you told him that we find love by accident. 😉January 5, 2017 – 1:51 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Ugh to the Facebook and the recurring breaks. And to getting back there, because connections and love in between the other crap. xoxo and I do believe we find love by accident, even sometimes with friends online.January 7, 2017 – 10:50 pmReplyCancel

  • Rabia @ The Liebers - I’m so glad for 2017 to be here. I don’t want to jinx myself, but it has to be better than 2016, right?!January 6, 2017 – 2:00 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m scared to say either way, but here’s to love and hope this year for all of us!January 7, 2017 – 10:50 pmReplyCancel

I recently got a lovely photo-filled holiday card in the mail from my friend Emily aka Em-I-Lis. The text over her gorgeous family was “2016. Was. Awesome.” When I saw that, I was like “WAIT WHAAAT??” In so many ways, 2016 sucked. I mean, we put a rapist back into society because it’d be sad […]

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  • Emily - I love Tucker’s long hair – so cute! I agree, 2016 was a mixed bag, but it’s ending on a good note for us because Big Dude got into college just last week…woohoo! So, I’ve decided I’m going to let that good news cancel out all the other yucky stuff this year.December 8, 2016 – 11:03 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks Emily! I think it’s cute. We’ll see whether it starts to bug him… it’s right at the tops of his eyes and it may start becoming annoying… YAYYAYYAY for Big Dude! That’s so awesome!December 10, 2016 – 3:19 pmReplyCancel

  • Debi Lewis - It’s important to list all the wins even despite all the losses. Thanks for reminding me! Our wins: never met our out-of-pocket-maximum for insurance this year, which is a huge indication of everyone’s excellent health; our daughters started middle school and high school and both seem to be thriving; all of us have solidified friendships; I discovered Finish the Sentence Friday!December 9, 2016 – 9:10 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Not meeting the max on out-of-pocket insurance money is an awesome win, Debi! YAY! I’m so glad you discovered Finish the Sentence. It’s a lot of fun and a great group of people participate. Thank you and happy December!December 10, 2016 – 3:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Jen Hicks - I love this post. As I’ve been trying to sort through the shit and clusterfuckery, looking for the good in this year, I’ve been happy to find quite a bit–no matter how big or small. I’ll hold those memories close and keep them in the front of my thinking. <3December 9, 2016 – 9:23 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Jen what a delight to see your name and yeah, this year… I’m still reeling that this freaking orange hate-filled buffoon is going to become president. I keep hoping that something happens to stop it. To stop him. But yeah, there’s been good in 2016 too. XOXODecember 10, 2016 – 3:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - So many wonderful things in here! I just said to Lizzi that I feel like the only one who doesn’t think 2016 totally sucked. This is the first year I feel like things have been really on the upswing here in a long time. I guess all of this illustrates how easy it is to get bogged down in and focus on the horrible and how easy it is to forget that there is good and beauty in every single day, even when it doesn’t seem that way.
    Now, if only I had a post…I just got too damn tired last night. 😀December 9, 2016 – 9:35 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You have loads of time for a post! I hope you’ll link up because I’d love to read all the things that were wonderful this year for you (although I know many of them I’m sure). And yeah, while there was some gigantic utter crap this year, there’s love and laughter and people. Good wonderful people. Like you!December 10, 2016 – 3:49 pmReplyCancel

  • Out One Ear - Linda Atwell - I love how this went. Even though, most times, my favorite lines are about Tucker. This time, though, there are still lines about Tucker that made me smile. But, my favorite line is: angry vagina-grabbing-Cheeto. If you’ve referred to him this way before, I missed it. It made me chuckle. I’m still so sad over this election of THIS particular man. Not a man really at all. A “Cheeto” as you wrote. That fits the president-elect so much better.

    As far as Tucker, it sounds like he has had a BIG year. Good for him. I hope you remember every single second of it.

    Hugs.
    Merry Christmas.
    🙂

    P.S. I am on the east coast–leaving today. My friend and I are (and have been) in South Carolina, too far to come by for a quick visit. I know we will meet someday!! Any possibilities of Oregon this summer?December 9, 2016 – 10:15 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hi Linda!
      Bummer that there wasn’t time to meet up! No plans for Oregon but maybe!?? And yeah, I’m still really sad and horrified that the vagina-brabbing-Cheeto is our next president. It’s unbelievable really. I kept thinking “surely this is the end of him,” and then again and again… and UGH.
      Tucker’s had a great year – he’s amazing and I hope I remember every good second too! Thank you and Merry Christmas and huge hugs and love back!December 10, 2016 – 3:57 pmReplyCancel

  • Michele - Kristi, this is lovely. It’s true that even in a beyond craptastic year, there are always bright spots — many of them in and among our own four walls. I’m glad you have made so many happy family memories this year! Here’s hoping 2017 brings even more of them, and happier days for us all. (We can hope.) Miss you! xoxoDecember 9, 2016 – 2:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thanks, Michele! You’re right – so much good and love between the awful news of the world and I miss you too! Hopefully we can catch up soon!December 10, 2016 – 3:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Bev - Thank you for reminding me that there are still beauty and so much to appreciate even among the crappy moments. This has been a rough year over all, but I do have so much to look upon fondly. And yay for losing teeth, getting new ones and new friends, trying new foods, and families members that are here to stay <3December 10, 2016 – 8:03 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hi Bev!
      Yeah, it’s been a crazy rough year for sure but still, so much to remember. Kids are pretty amazing at helping us to see the good… XODecember 10, 2016 – 3:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - So many lovely family memories here, but then DT puts his name on 2016 and for the foreseeable future and forever, always in the history books, as he likes it and as he intended. It makes me sad that he has spoiled what has otherwise been such a pleasant year, not just for myself, but for so many including you. You and your loved ones are doing so well, as are so many I hope, and yet this is really all that will stick in people’s mind when they think of this year. It has been a painful one as I suffered right along with you all, as your election cycle is always far too long, but this time round especially. As for me personally, 2016 has been one of the best years of recent memory for me and I am determined not to let a bastard ruin that. I do get bogged down by the fear and the resentment and the frustration and all that, but all the reasons we have to feel the warmth of the season, no matter how much snow or how cold, that is all still there. Comedy and humour helps me a lot, though it often feels wrong to laugh when so many are unable to. I can’t say 2017 won’t be another rotten one,come this time next year, but I am glad, for you specifically in this post, it hasn’t been all bad.December 11, 2016 – 1:39 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - UGH to stupid DT Kerry!!! HE SUCKS and it makes me super-sad too that he’s ruined so many things and has nothing but himself and some narcissistic ego thing going on to make him feel more important. I think his involvement in beauty pageants and reality TV maybe twisted his world view to forget the humanness among us. Or something. I dunno, but it sucks. Comedy and humor helps me too, but gah. I worry about Canada, too… sigh. and hugs to you and yours.December 11, 2016 – 8:56 pmReplyCancel

  • Dashy - Every year will have its good and bad times. It only just occurred to me after reading the first few lines that this year has such a negative tag. But then you’re right about the many good vibes each of us have every year, this one included. A lovely narration of your year.December 11, 2016 – 8:10 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You know, the whole point of this originally was to talk about holiday traditions, and I’d written a bunch about it but then realized I had something else to say because it wasn’t until I got my friend’s card that I realized how much I’d thought this year sucked when yes, it has, but also? There’s beauty and love and light. Always.December 11, 2016 – 8:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie G smith - I remember the first time Bear ate a hamburger, it was awesome. I think it’s now his favorite meal. And I agree, 2016 hasn’t been too awesome for me. But I’m trying to end it on an upbeat note😘.December 19, 2016 – 2:37 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OMG only another SN Mama would see that eating a burger is so awesome!!! Love you and yeah, the 2016. Freaking freaking freak. (Points for not the u right?)December 20, 2016 – 10:31 pmReplyCancel

Sometimes, we have so much to say that there’s nothing to say. Actually, strike that. Sometimes, we have so much to say that finding the tip of the tangled ball of thoughts that sits on our shoulders and whispers into our ears while trying to tame and untangle a stretch of it to resemble anything that […]

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  • Emily - This post actually made me miss the days when my kids used to wake me in the middle of the night, and I must say I didn’t love having my sleep interrupted so this post must be THAT good. 🙂 And, I’m glad you got away with a nap!December 1, 2016 – 10:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Wow thanks, Emily! I don’t like my sleep interrupted either but I’m all sentimental these days knowing that I only have a short time when he wants me (and believes in Santa) after having bad dreams!!! xooDecember 2, 2016 – 11:44 pmReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - Please, when times are rough, remember: Because you always come when I need you for bad dreams …” That’s everything.December 1, 2016 – 10:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - Please, when times are rough, remember: Because you always come when I need you for bad dreams …” That’s everything.December 1, 2016 – 10:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - You won’t always be so quiet and silent. I know that is true Kristi. You don’t quite know what to say these days and neither do I really. I am trying to organize my thoughts, but they are somewhat scattered lately.
    Aw, bad dreams are the worst, for children and at any age really, but having you to go to and to comfort, as you were comforted by him, that makes all the difference. That’s really what will stay with you both always.
    Off to sort out my own ball of tangled nonsense now and I hope to return to FTSF next time. Glad I read this though.December 3, 2016 – 2:49 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I know and thank you so much for saying so Kerry. It’s true that we all gather thoughts and yarn as we need to and speak when we need to as well… hope to see you at FTSF soon 🙂December 3, 2016 – 9:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Kelli - I don’t know how you do it when you tie so many stories into each other and then make them come together but you are an artist at it and I thinkin I read somewhere that you were going to write a book and I hope you will becauae I will read it!December 4, 2016 – 10:03 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You’re so sweet and thank you! I am kinda sorta writing a book and you know I’ll most definitely talk about it here if (WHEN!!!!) I finish it!December 5, 2016 – 10:39 pmReplyCancel

  • Lux - Beautiful. Never be silent as we need your voice and we need to hear your thoughts. 🙂December 5, 2016 – 2:56 amReplyCancel

  • JT Walters - I’ve been silent too. You know why. I thought I was the only person in the world or Mother for that fact that had to take a cat nap every once and a while. Sleep lends perspective.

    Government can not give you what you want. They can make laws but then their is the enforcement of loving and accepting everybne which is never going to happen because Government wants a divided country.

    What you dream of can be accomplished with your writing in a positive loving light which I have cme to love so much. None of these ideas you have to sell me on. You know that. But for everyone who reads your blog another 10 might hear of it and exponentially it grows. Change begins with each person. We can choose to love and accept each other or to hate but it is a choice at the end of the day.

    Keep writing and you will see those changes in attitudes you dream of. It is already on the horizon.

    We could not be more different politically and yet we agree in equality for all. Keep writing sweets because it will make your dreams come true but with honey and not vinegar.

    But of course, skipping rocks and hanging with Tucker is way more fun and important than changing the world. So Mom first superwoman second.December 5, 2016 – 11:28 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sleep is AWESOME at times. For real. And yeah, the gov’t is well, sigh. I can’t believe it’s where it is right now. You keep writing as well. I so hope you do. You know.December 6, 2016 – 10:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Goosebumps @ you always come. That’s sooo sweet.

    I’ve been quiet too and I don’t know how to get the un-quiet back…..

    First step – getting around to everyone I’ve missed.December 6, 2016 – 6:37 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Right? I thought it was so sweet too. I am a little sad though at how many of these cute things he says that I forget… and yeah, getting the un-quiet back is hard. So hard. Glad you’re touring around though. <3December 6, 2016 – 10:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Yvonne - Wow, that is lovely that Tucker knows his dreams aren’t real because you come when he has bed dreams.

    I can relate to so much of this, to having so many thoughts you can’t find words to speak (or write.) I’ve also not been posting much on my blog lately, but am writing.

    I’ve gone back to writing fiction and am working on a new novel.

    And yes skipping stones with a 7 year old and going to him when he has bed dreams is definitely helping the world. He will grow up to treat others with kindness because he has been treated that way. We parents have far more power than we realise.December 8, 2016 – 6:00 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - It’s usually real that he knows they aren’t real, although often, that doesn’t keep him from being frightened and I’m so fine with that. I know these young years will be soon gone (and are already fading)… I’m so happy you’re working on a new novel! I’ve been sucking at that. Did Nano but no new words… I need to get back. And yah, we parents have much power. We need to remember our voices are those in our kids heads!December 11, 2016 – 10:33 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie - I’ve been quiet on the internet, too. Just don’t know really what to say, you know? Over it. And skipping stones is always more important.December 8, 2016 – 7:06 pmReplyCancel

“Who’s your favorite character from Minecraft?” he says. “Ummm, maybe Hero Brian?” I say. “It’s not Hero Brian, it’s Herobrine and he’s evil, so he shouldn’t be your favorite,” my son replies with his longish-hair, scraggly, some missing, some half-growing-in-teeth-toothless-grin… He goes on and on about each character, explains having to “mine” cows for leather […]

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  • Kelly L McKenzie - You covered a lot of ground in this post, Kristi. It brought back so many memories for me. Like watching my friend enthusiastically play a Pokemon card game with her son even though she was exhausted and beyond bored, visiting my friend who was dying of pancreatic cancer yet refusing to talk about her impending death, and listening to my son’s barking cough in the night. Life is messy and complicated and SO worth experiencing. Thank you for these reminders. I just read a brilliant post in the New Yorker about Obama’s reaction to the election and came away with a sense of hope. Yes, even we Canadians are affected by the news. Hang in there, Kiddo, hang in there.November 17, 2016 – 10:18 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OOH Kelly, I’ll have to find Obama’s reaction post in the New Yorker – I could use a sense of hope for sure. And yeah, I know you Canadians are affected by it as well. Sigh. The whole world is really.November 18, 2016 – 9:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Something much deeper is happening and I feel sad too. Can’t shake it. Maybe I shouldn’t be isolating myself for social media (people). I don’t know. Sorry to hear about your co-worker. She makes a good point about pretty much “keeping in touch”. I need to do more of that. I have been doing alot of what Tucker said, breathing in and out through my mouth. My nose isn’t stuff but I guess you get a bigger inhale and exhale out of your mouth.

    Aren’t mommy ears something? Oh and Minecraft. I really tried to like it. But I gave up when my bricks wouldn’t stack one on top of each other to build a simple wall. Thankfully he moved on. He’s very into Cars and his games are driving games and customizing the car. I hate to drive to in a video game, it’s so reckless and I can’t stay on the road but it is better and Minecraft. 😉

    LOL to Hero Brain.November 18, 2016 – 8:51 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - It is so much deeper and I’m fairly certain it’s not good deeper although who knows. I know in history when things are bad that people getting sad and angry is what changes things so maybe this is the beginning to a world with less racism and bigotry and rape culture finally being talked about more? I don’t know either.
      And yeah, Mommy ears are amazing. So weird what we hear. I haven’t really played Minecraft but I’ve watched Tucker play it a lot. I like it in the sense that he learned how to read the word “inventory” because of it and it makes him use his imagination.
      Driving games are HARD!November 18, 2016 – 9:37 pmReplyCancel

  • Debi Lewis - I love so much about this post — the image of the 7 year old messy hair and missing teeth is one I can picture about both my girls at that age. I used to call 7 and 8 “the jack-o-lantern years.” I remember that age so fondly.

    And I also appreciate so much of what you say here regarding the Minecraft chatter being more tolerable because you thought he might never speak. I feel that way about my 11 year old’s requests for snacks before dinner. She went years without ever telling me she was hungry — food hurt, felt bad going down, was lots of work for her. Now that she had surgery to correct the problems that caused all that, she eats like a normal kid. It is inconvenient and totally wonderful.

    What a gorgeous post — thank you!November 18, 2016 – 9:31 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks for reminding me that I’m not alone with the whole snaggle-tooth “jack-o-lantern years” (love that) love of this age. I am pretty sure Tucker gets annoyed with me with how often I ask him to smile and SHOW HIS TEETH because SO CUTE. Gah.
      What a wonderful thing that your daughter now wants snacks and that it’s inconvenient and wonderful. Here’s to these amazing (and occasionally annoying) kids of ours!November 18, 2016 – 9:49 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - We here in Canada are with you, although sad, but breathing in and out like you say.November 18, 2016 – 1:21 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I just read yours and LOVE that we both talked about breathing in and out! So similar and yet so different – loved yours and appreciate your sweet comment and linking up!November 18, 2016 – 9:50 pmReplyCancel

  • Echo - Sometimes, I wonder how much I will miss the repetitive things that I roll my eyes at now. I will always cherish certain sounds though, like the way they say they love me. Especially when I need it the most.November 18, 2016 – 8:55 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I wonder too… here’s to hearing that they love us. That’s pretty much everything.November 18, 2016 – 11:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia @Menopausalmom - Another beautifully written post, my friend. I’m still trying to come to terms with the election results. But right now, it all seems so insignificant after hearing about your friend with cancer. So very sad……but her attitude is amazing.November 18, 2016 – 9:35 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thanks Marcia. You’re so kind. And yeah… dying makes everything different I think…November 18, 2016 – 11:15 pmReplyCancel

  • Scott - I think I messed it up. I tried breathing over and over, but now I have the hiccups.November 18, 2016 – 9:56 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - It’s amazing how kids are so expressive/profound and they don’t even realize it. Yes, we all do need to keep breathing in and out and maybe the world can become more joined together…November 19, 2016 – 9:20 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - They really are. I love it… and yeah, I’ve thought about the whole breathing in and out thing a LOT since I’ve seen further stuff happening that’s super hard to not feel hopeless over…November 20, 2016 – 10:19 pmReplyCancel

  • My Inner Chick - Hello, Sweets.

    thank you for reminding us to “BREATHE.”
    Sometimes, I forget!

    xxNovember 21, 2016 – 7:57 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hey you. Happy Thanksgiving and here’s to remembering to BREATHE. I forget, too…November 23, 2016 – 10:22 pmReplyCancel

  • Josie Two Shoes - This was a beautiful writing that really tugged at my heart. Oh yes, how precious are those words he speaks, and years from now you will wish he was still sitting behind you telling you all about Minecraft. As I rode behind my son, now the driver, when we met up with him and his girlfriend in Dallas this past weekend, he reached back his hand to connect with mine, and I remembered how I used to pick him up from daycare in the days before child carseats, and he would rub his head against mine, happy to be together and heading home. It is a scary world now, the undertones are heartbreaking and disturbing, by your son has it right, just keep breathing… things have a way of working out. Many good people will come together to see that all is not lost.November 25, 2016 – 4:05 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw that’s so sweet that your son reached back to take your hand and that it brought back memories of rubbing heads with him when he was little. <3 You're right, too, things do have a way of working out.November 25, 2016 – 8:41 pmReplyCancel

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