Finding Ninee bio picture
  • Welcome!

    Finding Ninee: NINE-ee, an airplane, in TuckTalk. Dedicated to finding humor and support for my son with delays of “The Middle World.” The spectrum exists but an autism diagnosis does not. While you're here, I hope you'll find a bit of humor, some perspective on what it feels like to be a special needs mom, a lot of compassion and some random stupid-looking drawings that I hope will make you smile.

Note: I’m linking up with the TToT because I’m thankful!! Yes, I posted this on Tuesday (while our trip was awesome, the wifi was not and I really really wanted to link this up last week). For those of you who already read this, feel free to check out my LTYM VIDEO, because I’m super thankful […]

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  • Mytwicebakedpotato - Loved this :)
    Especially the “not so little but still little boy”
    I understand thatJuly 7, 2014 – 11:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - And…. there IT IS! There is no greater feeling than that of landing in your mom place, with your perfect child and your perfect purpose. I am SO glad you embraced each and every moment this weekend, celebrating such a LIFE moment together.

    All of it. Messy, maddening, breathtaking,Perfect.
    Chris Carter recently posted…There Isn’t Enough of MeMy ProfileJuly 7, 2014 – 11:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Lana - Well, you did it again, and now I’m sobbing like a baby over here! Happy Birthday to your perfect son, and congratulations to you, the perfect mom for him. Have a great week!
    Lana recently posted…It’s Never Too Late To LearnMy ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 1:15 amReplyCancel

  • Out One Ear - Linda Atwell - Happy birthday Tucker. This is a beautiful tribute to a beautiful little guy.
    Out One Ear – Linda Atwell recently posted…A Couple With Special Needs: In Sickness And In HealthMy ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 1:47 amReplyCancel

  • Considerer - “Happy Birthday, ThisLife”? He’s every bit as deep and wonderful and amazing as you :)

    This is GORRRRRGEOUS and I love it to pieces, and you, and Tucker, and all the everythings of perfect that you all are and this is, even if someone feels the need to wrap it in labels – none of those people are here. It is what it is, and it’s LIFE and it’s lovely.

    Thank you for sharing Tucker’s birthday :)
    Considerer recently posted…Tales from the Van: The Man with Two BirthdaysMy ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 1:48 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, dude, thanks! The “Happy Birthday, ThisLife” was me. He was the “I say, (hesitation big) Thank you, fireworks” which, for HIM, is as big or as huge as “happy birthday this life, as, well, just a little over a year ago, water was still “ah.” We love you to pieces too, and labels are stupid and helpful and all of the betweens. <3
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Fifth Birthdays, and How Special Needs Parenting is Better than Sea MonkeysMy ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 10:23 pmReplyCancel

      • Considerer - You know what, I remember when you wondered if he’d be able to speak…he’s thanking the fireworks for bringing him happiness…he SPEAKS. And even if it’s sometimes still mu-isk, you know what? He can be understood and time will bring more words. He’s not daft; he’ll be alright, I’m sure. He’s making such progress, but more importantly, he has you in his corner, and he KNOWS IT. That counts for most of all.
        Considerer recently posted…You make me happyMy ProfileJuly 9, 2014 – 1:46 amReplyCancel

  • Nicki Gilbert - Kristi this is such an exquisite tribute to all motherhood everywhere – perfect, messy life indeed! Thank you for sharing your story so beautifully, so compassionately. LOVE the idea of the fireworks having something to say – happy birth day, happy life, to you all always! xoJuly 8, 2014 – 5:17 amReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Totally grinning ear to ear reading this today. Tucker’s 5th birthday looked absolutely perfect and magical, too. Seriously, hope I can now do Emma’s justice next week. Just so very happy to get to be a small part of his special day though and see the recap here :)
    Janine Huldie recently posted…Can’t Believe It Has Been 8 Years…Happy Anniversary to Us!!My ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 6:57 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I know you’ll do Emma’s bigger than justice, Janine. And, you know what? One thing I learned from Tucker’s fifth is that it just mattered that it mattered. He was fine when we said “no more toys” and that his cake wasn’t what he wanted (I should post about that too). It was just being special and five that mattered. You will ROCK Emma’s, I know it. <3
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Fifth Birthdays, and How Special Needs Parenting is Better than Sea MonkeysMy ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 10:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Louise - Happy 5th Tucker!

    It looks like you had a wonderful weekend – and the post was worth the wait :)
    Louise recently posted…Work, Wife, Mom … LifeMy ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 7:36 amReplyCancel

  • Kerri - Happy Day Boo’s Tucker!!!! You are just precious beyond words but your momma managed to do it. Awesome tribute to your son, my friend. Simply awesome.
    Kerri recently posted…They don’t go to Harvard wearing diapersMy ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 9:03 amReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - Oh, Kristi! This has me in happy tears. Every time I read a post of yours I think to myself this is the best one yet. Then I read another one and find out I was wrong. I love every word of this post and Tucker is so big and so handsome! Happy Birthday to your gorgeous in every way son!
    I’ve said it before….God knew what he was doing the day he gave Tucker to you…and you to Tucker.
    Sandy Ramsey recently posted…My Only SunshineMy ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 10:40 amReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - I loved the sentence scared to hope for but dared to hope for anyway. The other day Christopher asked me what was the best thing that had ever happened to me. At first I said because I have lived a lot longer than him, it was hard to choose. Then I said, “Actually the best thing that ever happened to me was having you.” He said, “Thanks mom.” I couldn’t see his face he was in the back seat but I felt that’s what he wanted to hear anyway ;-) – not that “hard to choose” explanation.

    Love the last line.

    I’m glad you guys had a beautiful “post hurricane” day. Love the pics and I really wanted to see one of the orange cake. ;-) July 8, 2014 – 2:04 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kenya,
      I think the having ONE kid thing is bigger and huger than we realize now. Because of course, of course (!) growing up, we (at least I did, and suspect you the same based on what I know of you) expected to have at least two, maybe three and while four sounds crazy it also sounds okay???) thought it would be different. But you know what? I’m glad we have one. Christopher and Tucker will always always know that they are our best things. LOVE that he wanted/needed that from you and I’ll show a pic of the no longer orange cake but orange letters soon, I promise!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Fifth Birthdays, and How Special Needs Parenting is Better than Sea MonkeysMy ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 11:05 pmReplyCancel

  • Drun Kenman - Kristi, this is such a wonderful, heartfelt tribute to your amazing boy. Happy birthday, Tucker!July 8, 2014 – 2:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Uplifting Families - Happy Birthday to your son, I hope he enjoyed his birthday and sea monkeys. I remember seeing my friend have some of those creatures, they were weird. It is funny how kids enjoy the simple things in life, enjoy it because it doesn’t last forever. As a teenager, he will want big toys like phones, tablets, game consoles and more.July 8, 2014 – 5:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah - Beautiful post! Happy Birthday Tucker! I can’t even imagine how magical your day was! What an amazing birthday celebration!
    Sarah recently posted…Whatever Wednesday XXXIIMy ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 7:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Lorre Lyons - Beautiful words! Happy Birthday sweet boy!July 8, 2014 – 8:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Sandy @ Being Content Where We Are - Such a sweet face in all of those pictures. Happy Birthday! I also have a 5 year old and identified with every word. Thank you for sharing his birthday celebration with us.
    Sandy @ Being Content Where We Are recently posted…Can a Working Mom be a Proverbs 31 Woman? verses 20-22My ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 10:07 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - I just love that conversation at the end — sooo awesome and sweet and innocent and PERFECT. And I love the moments too. I think sometimes those of us who have kids with any type of challenges learn to appreciate those moments sooner, because we take so much less for granted. At least I hope so.
    Emily recently posted…Little Dude Goes Back to Camp…and Back To Being A Kid AgainMy ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 10:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Courtney - Aw! This was so perfect. You are a wonderful special needs mom! I adore your pictures and Tucker’s sweet face. I hope he had a wonderful birthday! (My fave is the one of both of you. He looks so much like you!)
    Courtney recently posted…A Few Tips that are Making our Summer BetterMy ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 10:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Jessica Drummond - Absolutely beautiful, heartwarming, and so true! Happy Birthday Tucker.
    July 9, 2014 – 12:00 amReplyCancel

  • Meredith Yeverino - Happy Belated Birthday, Tucker! You’re mommy sure is over the fireworks for you!

    I just came from a support group for a group of mothers who are parenting special needs children (myself included). Your article is energy-giving. I think we under-emphasize that “typical” children are challenging in their own ways. Our individuality is intentional like a unique fingerprint of humanity. =)

    Thank you for sharing. I’ll visit again for your refreshing perspective. Blessings to you~July 9, 2014 – 12:05 amReplyCancel

  • Kristi - Better than Sea Monkeys, indeed! Happy birthday to Tucker, and thanks for fireworks!
    Kristi recently posted…Tuesday Time to Tackle: A Game of TagMy ProfileJuly 9, 2014 – 12:35 amReplyCancel

  • Roshni Chintalapati - Happy birthday to your wonderful, sweet boy!!July 9, 2014 – 1:01 amReplyCancel

  • Robert Martin Campbell Jr. - Words cannot express the gratitude and joy for the last five years with Tucker. You are truly in my eyes the world’s best mommy.

    Your loving redneck husband

    I cannot believe we had such a great time at the Jersey Shore…what great people and onderful week. July 9, 2014 – 2:15 amReplyCancel

  • Mike - I so loved this, Kristi! You echoed my sentiment that I’ve left in comments more than once about your adorable little Tucker – “And I knew, again, that this is exactly, perfectly, my perfect, perfect boy.” That’s only how I ever see him and will ever see him! Just in the time I’ve followed you and read dozens of your previous posts before we met I felt like I’ve been able to share along in reading your’s and his journey :) I sent a message the other day and doing so again here, Happy Birthday Tucker! I loved all of the pictures so very much but would pick that smile and on the swinging ride as my favorite. So free and full of joy in his right and perfect heart! So much love always sent to you guys from us! :)
    Mike recently posted…Lunch At The Stone House Cafe Reno, NevadaMy ProfileJuly 9, 2014 – 3:02 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - I love this post! You have so aptly described how it feels to hear “the words” and how that feels, but also how it feels to live and realize that life is still beautiful and your child is still perfect. Happy Birthday Tucker and well done mama!
    Lisa @ Golden Spoons recently posted…Things I Like and Dislike About Summer {TuesdayTen Linkup}My ProfileJuly 9, 2014 – 7:56 amReplyCancel

  • Christine - Oh Kristi, you are such a fantastic mom. I’m glad you had such a great time at the beach and watching the fireworks.
    Happy birthday, Tucker!
    Christine recently posted…M-O-R-A-T-O-R-I-U-M! What’s That Spell? (TToT #55)My ProfileJuly 9, 2014 – 8:19 amReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - “The sun still shines, the clouds still cloud, and the laundry still sits there, undone. Your kid is still the best boy ever”
    This whole post.
    All of it.
    Makes me call you a giant asshole because I’m in tears. You’re a good mom and don’t forget that. He is loved unconditionally and look at him bloom into an even awesomer awesome of the awesome. Makes no sense but you get it.
    Happy Birthday wee man
    Kimberly recently posted…Banana Slide And LifeMy ProfileJuly 9, 2014 – 9:30 amReplyCancel

  • Dana - First, happy birthday Tucker! Second, I love that your experience as a mom of an amazing boy with special needs has been the complete opposite of sea monkeys. That’s a message that other parents should hear – that I’m sure many NEED to hear. Even if it’s not exactly what you imagined it would be, motherhood and your baby are better than you ever imagined, right?
    Dana recently posted…10 reasons why it’s great to have one child of each genderMy ProfileJuly 9, 2014 – 9:34 amReplyCancel

  • Kathy at kissing the frog - Better than sea monkeys indeed. I like that analogy. There is nothing that is the same about parenting a special needs child. It completely makes you a better parent. I see that now. I used to wish that things wouldn’t be so hard, but now I wouldn’t have it any other way.
    Kathy at kissing the frog recently posted…Everyone Needs a Bucket ListMy ProfileJuly 9, 2014 – 11:15 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah Rudell Beach - Fireworks, indeed. I am in love with this post. It’s awesome, and you are awesome and Tucker is awesome. I’m so excited I get to meet you soon. Happy birthday to Tucker!July 9, 2014 – 1:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Julie Chenell DeNeen - Happy birthday!!! Now, Sea Monkeys are one of the great disappointments in this life. I hate the marketing and the tank and the agony when you realize they are not monkeys AT ALL!!! xoxoJuly 9, 2014 – 8:01 pmReplyCancel

  • Katia - I’ve actually never heard of sea monkeys (I live under a rock) but your analogy here was so beautiful and made the whole thing sound so magical that I thought it was something you invented until I read Julie’s comment. I absolutely love how you describe special needs as getting a face and that face is that single most wonderful and fulfilling, inspiring and significant face in the whole wide world and so “special needs” becomes that face and that takes the edge off The Words. You write so beautifully and originally that I am often at a loss for words after reading your posts. I feel that way right now. Happy birthday to that wonderful, wonderful face, and toes and smile and hair and loveliness and wonder which is your boy, Tucker. And to his absolutely amazing mama.July 9, 2014 – 8:42 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, thank you Katia! Sea Monkeys are the dumbest thing ever. I think they’re actually tiny shrimp. You get a package of them like freeze-dried or whatever, and add them to water and “watch them grow.” They’re gross and dumb! I love your comment. So much. Thank you.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Listen to Your Mother Video: Being a Special Needs MomMy ProfileJuly 11, 2014 – 10:04 amReplyCancel

  • zoe - HEY my wifi crapped out and lets me comment sometimes but your site is one of those ( Dyannes too) that doesnt like my phone so long story longer… I missed the comment on the bday party and just wanna say two things:

    1. If see monkeys dont have crowns and little castles then dont freakin advertise em like they do! seamonkeys suck air! which I suspect would kill them… they are basically krill which is food for fish so hell… what? Im growing the equivilent of brocolli and would be more excited by that… okay rant done!

    zoe recently posted…OH GREAT GRATITUDE, WORK YOUR MAGIC SPELL! please?My ProfileJuly 10, 2014 – 6:08 amReplyCancel

  • Anna Fitfunner - I remember “I like Dumbo ride” – my older son’s first unprompted words, which he spoke at Disneyland. We reacted just like you did to Tucker’s firework joy.

    It’s magical watching kids make sense of their world, and their place in it.

    Congrats on helping Tucker to grow and develop into everything that he can be. Know that he truly loves you.
    Anna Fitfunner recently posted…Game Review: Sara’s Cooking Class: Lasagna Roll-UpsMy ProfileJuly 10, 2014 – 6:38 amReplyCancel

  • Jill @ Do Try This At Home - Found you on the pin it party & had to rush right over because of the title. Very sweet post & happy birthday to Tucker!July 11, 2014 – 6:59 amReplyCancel

  • KeAnne - Beautiful post, and happy 5th to your sweet boy! My son turned 5 on June 2, and it’s hard to believe he has reached that milestone.July 11, 2014 – 12:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - How did I miss this??? Was I cleaning my house? You have reduced me to tears once again because…yes. All of it. Happy happy (belated) birthday to all of you!!!
    Zilla turned 6 in June and it’s so hard to believe it’s been that long…and that short…already.July 12, 2014 – 4:06 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Lisa, same way we all miss these – life gets in the way, which is totally how it’s supposed to Be and all that goodness. And yeah, so hard to believe it’s been that long and short and fast and slow, and happy happy belated birthday to Zilla who wow – six. Time it flies.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Listen to Your Mother Video: Being a Special Needs MomMy ProfileJuly 12, 2014 – 11:51 pmReplyCancel

  • BB - You’re awesome. What a great way to view special-needs parenting, and what a great ally and source of love you are for your son.
    BB recently posted…Things RecoveredMy ProfileJuly 12, 2014 – 9:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Tarana - Happy fifth birthday to your perfect boy! As always, beautiful post, Kristi. I love how you are so good at describing exactly what you want to say. Your writing really touches hearts.
    Tarana recently posted…30 Things To Do Before You Have KidsMy ProfileJuly 13, 2014 – 9:25 amReplyCancel

  • Joy Christi - That looks like THEE most wonderful vacation, for thee most wonderful family! Happy birthday handsome Tucker! He’s so lucky to have such a wonderul, loving, thankful Mom!July 13, 2014 – 12:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Romi - What a powerful piece of writing this is, Kristi.

    A little belated Happy Birthday to Tucker! And Happy Birthday to This Life!
    Happy Birthday to a new day!
    Romi recently posted…Ten Things of Thankful: July 6–July 12My ProfileJuly 13, 2014 – 5:49 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah - Exactly. You, as always, write it perfectly.
    Don’t even apologize for being out of the loop. I have been a mess and a half this summer trying to keep up with houseguests and trips and family illness.
    Sarah recently posted…TToT34: QuickieMy ProfileJuly 13, 2014 – 5:59 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sarah, the whole summertime IRL stuff is crazy. We have no babysitter for this next week unless a friend of mine comes through with a nanny share thing, and ugh. No clue how I’m going to be able to work and stuff!! Thanks for getting it but yucky to the family illness. I hope everybody is ok???
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Listen to Your Mother Video: Being a Special Needs MomMy ProfileJuly 13, 2014 – 11:16 pmReplyCancel

  • Val Newman - My heart is filled with so much love for Tucker and you and what a wonderful caring, loving PERFECT mom you are. And he is precious and adorable.

    Happy Birthday, Tucker

    ValJuly 13, 2014 – 6:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Jean Baldridge Yates - pure happy! xoxoxox jean <3
    July 13, 2014 – 7:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Marisa - I am new here and will be posting soon my TTOT –

    Happy Birthday to your perfect boy! :) July 13, 2014 – 10:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Jhanis - Look at that handsome young man! He is so lucky to have you as a mom, and how lucky you are to have such an awesome kid Kristi. You are such a strong person and I look up to you. I understand the fear, my little girl is a little behind on hitting her milestones too but we plod on. And you are such an inspiration!
    Jhanis recently posted…Small House Decorating Ideas That Will Save Your SanityMy ProfileJuly 14, 2014 – 10:27 amReplyCancel

  • Jolene Philo - Happy birthday to Tucker, and thank you America, for sharing your birthday party with this wonderful boy. I enjoyed getting to know you through this post. Thank you to whoever added it to’s Tuesday link share.
    Jolene Philo recently posted…Special Needs Ministry: Meet Michael’s VillageMy ProfileJuly 16, 2014 – 9:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Anna - He’s climbing a rock wall!!! Climb on!July 19, 2014 – 10:46 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Anna, well, it looks like he did a lot better with it than he actually did because of the photo. He wanted to climb it though, which is big. Huge. :)
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 11:35 amReplyCancel

  • Laurie Hollman PhD @ Parental Intelligence - Happy Birthday Tucker. Amazing how each birthday reminds us of the
    first.July 19, 2014 – 8:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Sylvia - Happy birthday to a sweet boy! It looks like you all had a successful celebratory day out. Tucker looks absolutely ecstatic! I’m so glad he had a wonderful birthday! Kristi, only you would be able to come up with some way of relating being a special needs mom to sea monkeys! I hate those things, but I love being a mom, special or otherwise!
    Sylvia recently posted…Friendship Friday: More Risky Behavior & The ZoomobileMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 9:17 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thanks so much Sylvia, we did have a successful trip – it took a few days to get it all in, and too late bedtimes and well, you know but yeah, I cannot complain because it was mostly beautiful and wonderful. HAHAH to sea monkeys and hating them! THey are awful!!!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 20, 2014 – 12:46 amReplyCancel

  • Misty - awe, that comment from your hubby is so awesome! i love to read your blog. makes me feel like i am right there living the moment with you. i think i have sand in my hair now. this post, all of your posts, is such a wonderful story about what it’s like to be a special needs family. we are all just ordinary people living extraordindary lives, right?!July 21, 2014 – 6:26 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw Misty – I agree that the comment from Robert was awesome and thank you huge big huge for the gigantic compliment!!! So happy to read that you have sand in your hair after reading it (and the best kind of sand needs no washing out yeah?). And yes. We are all just ordinary people living extraordinary lives. Or extraordinary people living ordinary lives? Almost, if you really really think about it, the same thing. Which is the part that binds us. xo
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 21, 2014 – 10:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie - Okay, that was ALLL kinds of wonderful!!!!! What a wonderful way to celebrate your boy – boy with the trip and the tribute! I agree whole-heartedly. My favorite is the line “Please don’t feel sorry for us.” I feel the same way. We have a wonderful, crazy and messy life, just like you.July 22, 2014 – 10:37 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks big Allie!!! It was awesome to take that trip with him. We almost hardly at all complained about the rides being per ticket prices rather than general admission when he had to ride the roller coaster and water rides a billion times. I know what you mean – it’s easy to feel sorry for us, right? But we do have crazy wonderful awesome lives… xo
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 22, 2014 – 8:38 pmReplyCancel

Almost every time that we go to our neighborhood playground, we see the same little girl. She must be about seven years old, and she’s always there alone. I’ll refrain from having an opinion on her being there alone all the time, because this is not a post about that, but one about self compassion […]

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  • Janine Huldie - First off, we just recently ran into a nasty little bullying girl at our own playground and had to explain to Emma that some kids are just plain not nice and to not let it get to her ever. Sad that at almost 5 years old that I had to do this, but I truly love your advice here and wish more parents would be on board teaching these simple lessons, because it sure would save our wonderful kids a lifetime of heartache or even disappointment. So, all I can say here is well said and thank you my friend for putting it bluntly and perfectly!
    Janine Huldie recently posted…IUD Birth Control Is Harder to Come By Than Viagra (FTSF)My ProfileJune 26, 2014 – 10:06 pmReplyCancel

  • Elizabeth - One of the things related to self-compassion I try to teach my son is that meanness does not form in a vacuum. Where did that little girl learn to be mean? Who is mean to her so that she replicates the behavior to others?

    In asking those questions, it gives us another perspective to get at root causes of his own meanness, crankiness, unkindnesses when they come up. We treat it like part of the human condition that he wants to control.June 26, 2014 – 10:17 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - The notion of self-compassion is so so important and seeing it compared to self-esteem, it’s eye-opening to me. It’s so true that self-esteem emphasizes differences while self-compassion does not. This was truly enlightening – thank you for teaching me something new!
    Emily recently posted…Is That A Giant Peach?!?My ProfileJune 26, 2014 – 10:18 pmReplyCancel

  • Kat - Most of the things that you touch on here seem like such common sense but so many people just don’t get it. Thank you for giving us all something to think about and a message to spread.
    Kat recently posted…Finish the Sentence Friday #8My ProfileJune 26, 2014 – 10:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Mike - Fantastic post and you up the ante to perfecting your message every time, Kristi. We are so proud of you! You said,”All this time, I thought self esteem was a good thing. It’s not, though, when you look at it through the lens of self esteem being dependent upon being different from, and better than one’s peers.” In that context I agree. But, as you came back to #5 on your list you confirm MY belief and my opinion that self-esteem is very good thing and that it is invaluable. On another note about this post, sometimes we are so close to a situation in our lives that we don’t see a lot of what others may see. From seat in front of the computer 3000 miles away from you guys over the past year it’s absolutely AMAZING to see, hear and read about Tucker’s phenomenal growth and progress! He’s such my little rock star and always will be! The part about the next school year had me absolutely BEAMING regarding that progress. As far as bullying goes…I have ZERO, ZERO TOLERANCE. I was bullied horrifically as a kid…big time. If Tucker has any problems with that please know that there is a man and his Golden Retriever who will gladly deal harshly with any bully of Tucker’s. Love you guys immensely :)
    Mike recently posted…CANCER-FREE CONTEST! Win $100…My ProfileJune 26, 2014 – 10:31 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Mike. You have such a beautiful heart. You inspire ME so much. Your dedication and love of Phoenix is amazing and beautiful and awe-inspiring. When it comes to #5, I think it’s okay for all of us to know that we are already perfectly imperfect. We’re all fucked up, and messed up, damaged, and broken. We are also the best of the best, and the most powerful of the powerful, because we are here. We feel. We believe. We matter, and we make a difference because we say FUCKYOU to growing up being treated like shit. But we also know that we’re more alike than different. We know that we’re connected. Because that’s the shit that gets us through this crazy painful life called life. And would we trade it? Nah.
      thank you huge big huge for getting it and for your love of Tucker and our family. We feel the same for you guys. Tell PDawg to make you give him some ice cream tonight. He deserves it.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…8 ways to foster self compassion. Or, how not to be, or raise, an asshole.My ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 10:43 pmReplyCancel

  • Anna Fitfunner - I see self-compassion showing up in a lot of belief systems, particularly Zen Buddhism. Your thoughts suggested the following story (not original to me): There is a Buddhist teaching that says that when you get hurt by an arrow, that is pain. The arrow hitting your arm, it hurts. It is pain. However, there is a second arrow, which is your reaction to the arrow. Getting angry and planning revenge against the person that shot the arrow at you, that is beyond pain, that is suffering. Self-compassion means realizing that it is not necessary for you to suffer.
    Anna Fitfunner recently posted…Compromise But Retaining Values – FTSFMy ProfileJune 26, 2014 – 10:48 pmReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - I am pulling Cass from public school this year… and this has much to do with it. in addition to the sex, drugs, and bullying that now 11 year olds do. Sick, I know.

    Self compassion can be the connected to others compassion… it all intertwines as the golden rule. And there is far too much separation in this world- built with barriers of countless kinds. Far too much hate and vulger cruelty…

    We’ve lost our morals, our values in this society. Thank God there are precious strings that are fluent in love. I am clinging to them. And you.

    KRISTI! (I couldn’t just say that- how could I? Maybe next time!)
    Chris Carter recently posted…Words of Encouragement for a 16 Year OldMy ProfileJune 26, 2014 – 11:03 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh Chris. Really? I’m so sorry (and glad)?) because not sure how I feel about public vs. private right now. Tucker got so much help in public, but it was here, and with preschool autism classroom, and with non cat and I know it’s not the same everywhere…. We have lost morals. But in so many ways, we haven’t, you know? I mean there are all of us wanting them and wanting compassion for our children. Maybe this- the blogging and the writing and the scared hopefulness is what It Is About? Maybe. I hope.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…8 ways to foster self compassion. Or, how not to be, or raise, an asshole.My ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 11:16 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - I’m terrified of kindergarten and I see parents going through middle school and high school and I honestly don’t know how I will survive to that point.
    Especially when I read Chris’ post and others. Those kids are out there. My kids are not those kids. Yet. However I realize every day how important it is that they aren’t.
    Scarlet gets empathy and kindness pretty well.
    Des hits the cat, but he’ll learn.
    Tamara recently posted…In Which I’m Interviewed By a Sports Reporter.My ProfileJune 26, 2014 – 11:24 pmReplyCancel

  • MyTwice BakedPotato - I wish that I could say that school will be filled with kindness, but because you know our situation…you will know why I can’t.
    My experience is that some of the biggest bullies are grown ups that should know better, but they are themselves inflexible in their thinking and acceptance of others. We go through waves of hearing a lot of self doubt, that is hard. I try and cushion the falls as much as I can and honestly do worry about the day when he turns to others to fill that role. I hope by then he has grown to love and appreciate all of his giftsJune 27, 2014 – 2:19 amReplyCancel

  • karen - I remember a little bully in the mall play area…his fatehr’s way to deal with him was to push his head or grunt at him…no wonder the kid was the way he is.
    I love this post, I have to start teaching Dino to understand why kids act the way they do…they learned it somewhere…just like he learned to be kind, use manners, and give hugs.
    I fear that he too will be bullied in Kindergarten, all it takes is one kid to pick out a victim…but I also hope that with Dino being friends with everyone he meets that he will befriend the victims and stand up for them perhaps.
    karen recently posted…Knowing My LimitsMy ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 5:41 amReplyCancel

  • Yvonne - Kristi, this post is just brilliant. I feel honoured to be included in it. I love your quotes from Sarah and Deb too.

    And those 8 ways to foster self-compassion! Yes to every one of them. I particularly like the first one, third and seventh. First because it is such a great way to explain to someone what self-compassion looks like. Third because, yes, yes – allow your feelings first and then so often it is easier to drop our resistance. And the seventh is something that doesn’t often get discussed, but is really important – so often I’ve seen adults react with confusion when kids point out that someone has a different colour of skin or is different in some way. But the children aren’t judging, they are curious and there’s a world of difference. It’s utterly okay to realise that we are all different and yet, as you also point out, underneath we are far closer than we often realise.
    You’ve got me thinking about self-esteem again (as did Mike’s comment) and I guess that instead of high, what we want is healthy self-esteem, where we are able to see ourselves realistically, feel okay as we are, and yet also be willing to change when it’s for our best interests. Self-compassion fosters that.

    I’ve already said this, but really I just love how you’ve included quotes from other bloggers – I love that what we’ve written can spark something in you, that then sparks something in someone else, and in me again. It’s so wonderful to have this amazing tool, the internet, to connect like this and create mutual support and growth!
    Thank you for this beautiful post, my friend!
    Yvonne recently posted…A mixed bag of thankfulnessMy ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 5:59 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yvonne,
      Thank you so much for your original comment. Although I’d read about self compassion, it was not until your comment that I really started thinking about how different it is from self esteem and I thank you for helping me become more aware. Thanks for agreeing to allow me to use your quotes, too – they are perfect. And yeah, the number seven one is a big one. It can be uncomfortable to know what to say to kids when they notice a difference, but by getting weird and whispery about it, we’re really teaching them that there’s something wrong with noticing. So I try to directly acknowledge it and do so without weirdness or a big reaction. Hopefully I’m doing it right! And thanks again!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…8 ways to foster self compassion. Or, how not to be, or raise, an asshole.My ProfileJune 28, 2014 – 10:24 amReplyCancel

  • Lizzi Rogers - The children who are bullies are often the kids who need more love, not less, and it’s horrible to see them isolating themselves because they don’t know how to react appropriately to the crap going on in their lives. Sometimes they’re just assholes, too, and that sucks, but often it comes from a place of hurt. Same with angry kids. I know kids like that little girl and I’m glad you did a good thing.

    I love this post. I love how much you care and how mindful you are, and how determined to somehow change the world so that Tucker grows up knowing his own worth and that his value is intrinsic, not based on transient ‘of the moment’ things. You are fierce and wonderful and your drive for this notion is incredible :)

    I’m glad I read this. I find #2 far easier than #1, but okay. I’ll try.June 27, 2014 – 6:48 amReplyCancel

  • Tarana - You’re not alone in your fears about school. I find school to be a stifling influence, anyway. It’s sad to see kids turning into bullies because they are just starved of love and affection at home.
    Tarana recently posted…Dear Son, Follow your heart…My ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 7:32 amReplyCancel

  • Misty - awesome post. i’d never thought about the relationship esteem has with success, but it makes a lot of sense. patty is already having worries that 2nd grade will be too hard for her, we saw this in 1st grade too. i try to always remember that even the regular kids have things they struggle with in school, i’m guessing there are only a handful of kids who find that all of school comes easily to them? there’s no one size fits all reaction, we just tell patty to do her best and we will love her no matter what! as for that playground bully, you have a great opportunity to be a positive role model in her life. obviously she hasn’t been taught about acceptance and how to be respectful of others. she is lucky that you guys go to the same playground!
    Misty recently posted…Special Education + Passing GradesMy ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 9:29 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I haven’t thought before about the relationship between esteem and success either but I really am thinking about it a lot now, mostly because I know that Tucker’s a prime candidate for giving up on something because it’s “too hard.” I had things I struggled with in school – I think most people have something they struggle with. The challenge for my son will be that he struggles with so much more than so many of his peers. I just never want him to feel like he’s a dummy…. so hard to know how to help them just be the best they can and not worry about it, ya know?
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…8 ways to foster self compassion. Or, how not to be, or raise, an asshole.My ProfileJune 28, 2014 – 10:40 amReplyCancel

      • Misty - totally. i guess all good parents worry that we are “messing up” our kids, right? it’s not just those of us who face the regular with a little extra thrown in for good measure?
        Misty recently posted…This Week, Around the Web Pt. 2My ProfileJune 29, 2014 – 8:35 amReplyCancel

  • nothingbythebook - I think this is a beautiful post, and a message that cannot be repeated too often. The one point that I veer off-course with you at is… I don’t think everyone is the same on the inside. Nor should they be. A land of compassion should celebrate difference-diversity-uniqueness as much as it seeks to highlight similarity-bridges-commonality. I am quite different–inside and out–from some of the people I most love. And that’s ok… wonderful, in fact. Does that make sense?
    nothingbythebook recently posted…I’m going to do everything I can to convince my daughter NOT to be a stay-at-home mom. Want to know why?My ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 11:34 amReplyCancel

  • Drun Kenman - I could definitely do better in the self-compassion department, as could quite a few other people I know. A lot of us are our own worst critics, and I have no idea how to rectify that. June 27, 2014 – 12:56 pmReplyCancel

  • Deb @ Urban Moo Cow - I loved this post and also Yvonne’s response. Healthy self-esteem. True self-compassion. So difficult, elusive, yet so important. I think about it every day. And sometimes the fact that I wrote that Our Land post makes me stop for a second and think about what I am saying to myself. I put it out in public, and now I need to start trying a little harder! Something like that.

    I also agree with Jane — celebrating diversity is the key. But also key is that we are all part of the same mosaic, all drops in the same ocean. It’s a balance, a very important one. Brava you.
    Deb @ Urban Moo Cow recently posted…How to Make Your Life Super DifficultMy ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 1:41 pmReplyCancel

  • Deb @ Urban Moo Cow - Also: Wow. I can’t believe it’s been a year since I wrote that piece!
    Deb @ Urban Moo Cow recently posted…How to Make Your Life Super DifficultMy ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 1:44 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah - OK, you’re not the only one. This is a new idea to me, too, and I LOVE it. I struggle with the concept of strengths (on which to base self-esteem) and challenges. While I think it is valid and am definitely not talking of discarding the idea that everyone has strengths, the bottom line is that some people’s strengths are stronger than others’. Horrible to admit, but true. I love this idea of self-compassion over self-esteem because it covers that. You don’t have to find a strength that stands out from everyone else’s you just have to have compassion for yourself and others. It’s a whole new idea, a whole new way of looking at it!
    Also loved how you quoted the different bloggers. I need to read that book Yvonne was talking about. I am always struck by her use of language.
    Sarah recently posted…TToT31: Sometimes It’s Just EasyMy ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 1:49 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I love it too Sarah. And I think it’s really important to know that we’re fine the way we are and that while we should strive to be better for ourselves, that knowing other people are better at things than we’ll ever be should not take away from our own achievements. Or something like that. And yeah, I need to read that book too.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…8 ways to foster self compassion. Or, how not to be, or raise, an asshole.My ProfileJune 28, 2014 – 11:00 amReplyCancel

  • Brittnei - Hmmm…I think you are right about self-esteem. The idea I think is to teach kids who they are, compassion and how to treat others. People who know who they are, understand how to care and show compassion towards others don’t find themselves on either end of arrogance or self hate. Either end of the spectrum can make for some pretty crappy personalities. :( On the other hand, I’d like to believe that my faith helps with establishing the balance of how I see myself and others as well as how I treat both. :)
    Brittnei recently posted…My Thankful List of CompromisesMy ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 1:49 pmReplyCancel

  • Clark Scottroger - interesting Post. As a child who went through all of the bad/negative interactions (along with the positive) in school, I can identify. Hell, half my motivation for pushing the Doctrine is surely tied to the desire to spare the young clarks of the world the bad shit I went through, and I will continue to try.
    But part of what someone said or wrote (somewhere) about, I don’t know, I think it was ‘empowering young women (or some other group of lifeforms), caused me to think, ‘wait a minute! you can’t empower me! no one can empower anyone (but themselves)’.
    I think I will stick with that… but, that is not the same (as some rogers might now be starting to respond), the same as doing nothing at all.
    imo, you are already doing what can (and should) be done for Tucker to prepare to meet the next challenge, and that is love him in a way that he will know that he has a place where none of the things that others say, matter. I like to think of this (aspect of a relationship) as ‘being a place to stand that is certain’.
    Speaking for myself and remembering (as a clark will) my own experiences at that age, having even a small spot of certainty in my life was the most important thing for me, at that time.
    June 27, 2014 – 3:48 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie - How in the world did you whip up this amazing post so quickly?!??!?! I’m in awe! And after the terrible driving traffic day we’ve just had – and my resulting snarkiness toward the children:( – I am grateful to you for reminding me to have self compassion. And have fun with the kids. My only contribution, form my fried brain would be to have a forgiving heart.

    BTW – Tucker is not weird, he is completely charming and adorable. Also, there’s a reason that girl is always by herself and hopefully she took your advice to heart.June 27, 2014 – 4:49 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - I never really thought much about this difference between self-esteem and self-compassion. However, I agree with the points you have made. I would certainly scold my children if they referred to someone negatively as “Fatso,” yet I call myself that in my head on a regular basis. Why don’t I deserve the same compassion I would expect to be given to a complete stranger? It is definitely something I need to thin about and work on with my girls.
    Lisa @ Golden Spoons recently posted…Beauty in the BrokenMy ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 5:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - I never really thought much about this difference between self-esteem and self-compassion. However, I agree with the points you have made. I would certainly scold my children if they referred to someone negatively as “Fatso,” yet I call myself that in my head on a regular basis. Why don’t I deserve the same compassion I would expect to be given to a complete stranger? It is definitely something I need to think about and work on with my girls.
    Lisa @ Golden Spoons recently posted…Beauty in the BrokenMy ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 5:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Stephanie Smith Sprenger - This is absolutely amazing, my friend. Insert appropriate sports metaphor about slam dunks or out of the park here. This post is SO important, and you pulled it all together so beautifully. I haven’t read Neff’s book, but now I really want to. Kudos to you. June 27, 2014 – 8:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Lana - You are awesome. You did a brilliant job of comparing self esteem/self compassion. I have felt for several years now that we focus too much on self esteem with our children, and I’m worried that we have created a very narcissistic generation – time will tell. The world would be a much more wonderful place if we all spent more time on self compassion. Discussing it is a wonderful place to start. Have a great weekend!
    Lana recently posted…Sharing Some Gratitude Part TwoMy ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 9:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana Montenegro Hemelt - You write that we are more alike than different, and that is SO important to remember. A child may focus first on the difference between him and his peer, but if adults (teachers, parents) point out what the two of them have in common, you may just get the start of a friendship. I’ve seen it happen, and I hope it will happen in kindergarten for Tucker. June 27, 2014 – 11:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Alison - This is such an important and beautiful post, thank you for writing it. Thank you for your tips. I think kindness goes a long way – towards ourselves, our family, our friends, our community (in real life and online). Compassion goes a long, long way.
    Alison recently posted…Through The Lens Thursday #26: ImperfectMy ProfileJune 28, 2014 – 7:39 amReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - I’m reminded of something I’ve not thought of in a while. It was at swim practice and a little boy lashed out verbally at the son of a friend of mine. His dad just sat there listening, not correcting the son. My friend (the mom) stood up and walked over to the dad and laced into him. In a firm but polite way. Dad refused to get it. He shouted at her, grabbed his kid and stormed off. Ouch. We then had a lengthy chat with our own two kids about what happened. It was a wonderful talk for us. For the other lad? Probably not so much.June 28, 2014 – 11:42 amReplyCancel

  • Denise Farley - Thank you for this post Kristi. I don’t mean to be all “gooey” but by writing this post and putting it “out there” you truly epitomize the “starts at home ” concept. But not only that because as you referenced with your links, there are others who are doing the same. One person at a time. On the whole of it, it always seems as if the “it has to start at home” bit is idealistic indulgence. I have never believed that. Each of us indivudally possesses great power when it comes to promoting/encouraging positive feelings in others. The first natural place is with your own children if you have them. Very impressive that you felt compassion for the girl bully. It is a natural first instinct not to. Especially when your own child has fallen victim to her negative self image. Compassion is key. Understanding is key. More so with children for they don’t yet have the perspective that comes with age and experience. I babble today but I know you get what I’m saying. June 28, 2014 – 12:06 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi - I agree with Lizzi, that often the bullies need compassion, too. Good for you for taking the time to patiently and kindly teach that little girl. Bullying, of course, is not OK, but if we all viewed the actions of others under the umbrella of “where are they coming from?” we could interact with more kindness.

    Self-compassion is a great tool. We need to be as patient with ourselves as we are with others. Sometimes we can see the potential in others, but fail to recognize it in ourselves. We can love who we are becoming, not just the flawed person we are at the moment.
    Kristi recently posted…Monday Morning in the Kitchen: Blueberry Sour Cream CrispMy ProfileJune 28, 2014 – 1:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Ruchira Khanna - I am with ya on this Kristi. If a person has not self compassion, many other factors become invisible which eventually lead to his existence being as a nobody!
    My post is also going towards that path with the hope for a better world for your son and mine!

    Have a good weekend!June 28, 2014 – 5:56 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - This is such an important message, Kristi. I am disturbed beyond belief at how much I had to explain to my daughter this year – in Kindergarten for crying out loud – about bullying, nastiness, and how to handle the choices that other people make in our general direction. Ridiculous. You’re right – as a society, we have abandoned morals and simple human decency, it seems. Whatever happened to being polite and kind simply because it was the right thing to do? Makes my stomach turn, actually, when I see how mean kids (and adults…and everyone) can be to one another. Tucker will be great because you will be right there helping him deal with the bullshit that life tosses at us.June 28, 2014 – 10:23 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Lisa,
      I’m really bummed to read that you had to explain to your daughter about bullying already. Sigh. That’s REALLY sad. And scary. What’s wrong with people? Isn’t being kind pretty easy? UGH. And thanks so much for the encouragement. I just hope he’ll let me know if people at school are mean to him. It’s hard because I’m not sure he has the language to explain if that happens, ya know?
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…8 ways to foster self compassion. Or, how not to be, or raise, an asshole.My ProfileJune 29, 2014 – 9:56 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah Almond - I have a feeling that Tucker will thrive. But I get what you are worrying about. My son is special needs, but he is picked on because he is not socially acceptable, because he says what is on his mind rather than what he SHOULD say. That censor is not there, he is Sheldon Cooper. And I don’t have a diagnosis to say “Hey this is why he acts this way.”

    And I worry constantly about how others treat him because he has no censor-and he has no self-control and no friends. :-(

    I love your tips. Kristi you are awesome.
    Sarah Almond recently posted…Cheesecake Murdered My Oven and Other Ridiculous TheoriesMy ProfileJune 28, 2014 – 11:46 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh Sarah, that’s so damn hard :( Can you go to the school and talk about special needs or something? I mean he doesn’t have to have a diagnosis to know that he processes things differently right? UGH. I’m really sorry that he’s getting picked on. That sucks and makes me super sad and want to go to his school myself and talk about kindness and empathy and that everybody has challenges!!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…8 ways to foster self compassion. Or, how not to be, or raise, an asshole.My ProfileJune 29, 2014 – 9:59 amReplyCancel

  • Laurie Hollman, Parental Intelligence - This is a wonderful post because it’s about compassion and connection. The two C’s that make us human. The post itself offers both those virtues and is very moving to read. Thanks.
    Laurie Hollman, Parental Intelligence recently posted…“STAY-AT-HOME” AND “WORKING MOTHERS” UNITEMy ProfileJune 29, 2014 – 4:50 pmReplyCancel

  • Jennifer Hall - This is wonderful, Kristi. My daughter has ADHD and she if fully aware that means her brain works differently than other people’s brains. Sometimes she gets frustrated, like when she forgets or loses something, but she is also developing a sense of humor about it, which I love. Her self-esteem has taken some hits. She’s not a good self-advocate. I will chew on this idea of self-esteem vs. self-compassion some more, and hopefully I can pass it on to her. Thank you!June 29, 2014 – 11:33 pmReplyCancel

  • Katia - I wish I had more ideas, but you, my friend, captured this perfectly. Yvonne and you are both incredibly wise and caring. I’ve bookmarked this page because I know I’m going to want to come back to it and be reminded of some of the ways to practice self compassion and to teach it to my kids’. Self compassion doesn’t come naturally to me. In fact, my inner dialogue is the opposite of self compassionate. Your first advice resonated with me greatly. I know that I’m my own worst judge and accept it as a given, but should I? You wrote beautifully and from a beautiful place, which is very compassionate to begin with it. That girl would have evoked the same feelings in me. I can’t stand bullying.
    Katia recently posted…Are Kids TV Shows Designed to Drain Our Last Remaining Shreds of SanityMy ProfileJuly 1, 2014 – 1:52 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I can’t stand bullying either, Katia, and have a similar voice to yours in my head. Telling me I am old and fat and stupid, and that everybody does parenting better than I do and a 1,001 other things…but really, do I want my son to believe those things about me? About himself? NO. So I need to make it so that I don’t believe them either, ya know? So hard tough. So hard. Hugs to you – you are enough, exactly as you are. I promise. <3
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…8 ways to foster self compassion. Or, how not to be, or raise, an asshole.My ProfileJuly 1, 2014 – 5:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Kate Hall - Wow, Kristi, this is just beautiful. I love it. I love those 8 ways. I want to work on #3. I find myself trying to do that, but not quite. I was on the computer last night and heard my family out on the trampoline (husband too). I wanted to join the fun, so I walked away from the computer while I was alone (gasp!) and went out to be with my family. We only had 15 minutes before it got too dark to be outside, but I’m glad I went out. Also, I got a shirt at that Peeps store too. But mine says, “Chillin’ with my Peeps.” haha!July 2, 2014 – 12:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Kate Hall - P.S. I don’t see a Facebook share button on here. Am I missing it? – I see the like button.July 2, 2014 – 12:01 pmReplyCancel

  • Stephanie - Kristi, this was so eye-opening. I had never considered the difference between self-compassion and self-esteem and I have about 13 things I want to quote from above, suffice it to say I’m going to re-read this and talk to my own children because it’s doubtful they know the difference either – and they need to, just as I do.July 2, 2014 – 1:03 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah Cass - I’ve worried about my special needs girl every single year that she’s been in inclusive classrooms. I cried over her every day when I’d pick up her sister from kindergarten and I’d see her out at recess…alone…but she is smart, beautiful, and so much stronger than I gave her credit for. We’ve considered putting her in a different school district w/ a better special needs program…but she’s managed to make leaps and bounds and even made some friends.
    Sarah Cass recently posted…Secret Cravings Winter Wonderland Blog HopMy ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 7:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Louise - I love this – and the idea of self-compassion rather than self-esteem. I may look up that book, as I’d agree that sometimes self-esteem/boosting self-confidence has the effect of making kids think they are better at things than they are (which is demoralizing in the end) and also unnecessarily leads to competition (many things in life are competition – but not everything).

    As for the bully on the playground – good on you for approaching it head on. I remember being at the beach once with my eldest before she had eye surgery (she was about 2 and change at the time). She was pretty cross-eyed before the surgery and one of the kids on the beach referred to her as a “freak” and she heard. I suspect she knew enough to understand it wasn’t a compliment. At the time I was angry, took her away, and didn’t approach the kid in question. I should have – because I suspect much that sounds mean from young kids can be diffused with some explanation.

    A lovely post!
    Louise recently posted…Watching the WorldMy ProfileJuly 3, 2014 – 11:54 amReplyCancel

  • Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life - Kristi, this is amazing. I try to do this with my kids, and I hope I have been successful. We’ve all the target of “meanness” at one point or another and when it happens, I try to use it as a learning experience, talking about how it made each of us feel and why we should not do that to others. Life is a learning experience, no matter how old we are. Self compassion is very important.

    I want my kids to have good self esteem too, but I also never want them to think they are better than others…every person has a gift…it’s just a matter of finding it.
    Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life recently posted…6 Simply Wonderful Starters and #FoodieFridays no.3My ProfileJuly 6, 2014 – 8:44 amReplyCancel

  • Roshni - That’s a wonderful assessment by Yvonne that we all cannot be above average and that that’s okay! Compassion is such an important trait in a fast-paced society and I’m so glad you wrote about it so beautifully!
    Roshni recently posted…How to annoy your children!!My ProfileJuly 7, 2014 – 4:41 pmReplyCancel

  • Roshni AaMom - The pendulum keeps swinging each generation of parents. Earlier, we used to focus on achievement and performance; later, we feared low self-esteem and we started preaching the ‘everybody is a winner’ dictum…possibly leading to a whole generation of narcissists! Now, hopefully, parents like Kristi can raise awareness that the most valuable lesson we can teach our kids is self-compassion!July 7, 2014 – 9:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Roshni AaMom - The pendulum keeps swinging each generation of parents. Earlier, we used to focus on achievement and performance; later, we feared low self-esteem and we started preaching the ‘everybody is a winner’ dictum…possibly leading to a whole generation of narcissists! Now, hopefully, parents like Kristi can raise awareness that the most valuable lesson we can teach our kids is self-compassion!July 7, 2014 – 9:30 pmReplyCancel

It’s been almost three years. Three years since I tried to pull the shades down on the too-bright light of my fear. Three years since those whispering-drowning-it’s-all-your-fault dreams. It’s been almost three years since I knew that something wasn’t quite right. Since I stood in my little boy’s pediatrician’s office. I remember standing there, waiting, […]

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  • Mike - FRIST!! :)
    Mike recently posted…CANCER-FREE CONTEST! Win $100…My ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 11:48 amReplyCancel

  • Mike - Oh my gawd, Kristi….this got me sooooo choked up!! I have absolutely loved following the journey of Tucker and his mom for so long now. Going back and reading virtually all of your old posts to fully encapsulate the entire life story. One that is still just beginning in all the beautiful and wonder that Tucker is becoming and will continue to be! We are so very proud of you young man and sending so much love your way. We still have a mac n cheese buddy date to get to, our little friend! Your friends forever, Mike and Phoenix :)
    Mike recently posted…CANCER-FREE CONTEST! Win $100…My ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 11:52 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Awww! Thank you so much Mike and Phoenix!! We appreciate the love and support and feel the same about you two! Tucker was SO happy to see PDawg’s cancer free photos and of you both being so happy. Sending lots of love and best wishes for an amazing weekend, friends. xo
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 11:57 amReplyCancel

  • Misty - how awesome!!!! now that i’ve had two kids complete three (lol) years of kindergarten, i volunteer to be your go to with all the crazy questions about what the heck’s going on in kindergarten. and after three years, i have my answer ready and waiting: i don’t know why in the hell schools are doing this! congrats to you and tucker! and what part of tn are your in-laws from?
    Misty recently posted…This Week, Around the WebMy ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 11:54 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Misty, I may need to take you up on your offer of being the go to for all kindergarten related questions. Tucker’s going to be mainstreamed with 18 1/2 support hours (plus an 1.5 of speech and OT). I’m really nervous. And hopeful. And terrified.
      Inlaws are from Elizabethton. It’s pretty close to Bristol, if you know where that is?
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 12:00 pmReplyCancel

      • Misty - keep us posted about the mainstreaming. find out if kindergarteners are introduced and expected to remember “sight words” either fry or dolch. i’m seriously considering pulling patty from special ed when school resumes in august for second grade. i was told that for her to qualify for special ed under developmental delay she must be graded as “below level”. i want her report card to accurately measure her performance, not just completely write her off, i mean why even bother grading her work if she’s just going to be “below level” in everything?!
        Misty recently posted…This Week, Around the WebMy ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 9:20 pmReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - Misty, ok so I’ve never even heard of “sight words” so one more thing I need to learn about I suppose… and I totally get not having any value in “below level” because what does that help or mean? Nothing. Ugh. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. I heard from a friend at work that it gets harder as the kids are older. We’d have considered the self-contained autism program but there are only 4 IEPs going into kindergarten and the self contained class is of much older kids. I know some of Tucker’s friends who are going to other schools next year where the program is different because the peers are. So much for it being about the program – it’s not, I know. It’s about where the other kids in the class are and having role models. Which I get, but it still makes me want to build my own school.
          Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 11:59 pmReplyCancel

          • Misty - i think about homeschooling at least once a week! btw, i’m posting about “sight words” tomorrow!
            Misty recently posted…It’s Yard Sale Time!My ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 6:36 am

      • Jenn - How did you get approved for support services before starting school? I have been told by my son’s future school that they would only start rti services (ie pull out) after 6weeks and only if he is behind. Would not get classroom modifications until 2nd grade but only with a dx of a learning disability. So, reactive not proactive. There is little chance, even if hell did freeze over, that we would get a one on one aid.

        FYI. My kiddo has speech apraxia and motor apraxia along with feeding problems.

        Also, I’m from northeast tn -yea hillbillies!June 21, 2014 – 10:28 pmReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - Jenn,
          Here, in Northern VA, it’s called Early Intervention (I’ve heard it referred to as Child Find as well) and they do an eval. If the child falls behind by x% (can’t remember what % it is and it likely varies from state to state), they automatically qualify for services. I know that my step-mother-in-law, in Elizabethton, has a friend who has a son who qualified, although I don’t know the details. Tucker likely has apraxia of speech as well. I think feeding problems are a big trigger though – is there somebody you can ask about the services? I mean besides whoever told you that it’s not possible? I was under the impression that each state has to offer something (even just speech or OT inhome) as part of no child left behind, but I’m not sure. Feel free to email me and I’ll get you in touch with smarter-than-I-am people about it. And I’m so sorry that they’ve given you the runaround on it. So not fair. We don’t have a medical diagnosis, but I also know docs sometimes give them when they’re not sure to ensure there are supports in place….
          Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 12:04 amReplyCancel

        • Misty - your comment caught my eye, and it sounds like what your school is telling you is not what IDEA says. i’ve read nothing in IDEA that says you have to wait 6 weeks and modifications are only granted under very specific circumstances. unfortunately, states do have a lot of say in how IDEA is carried out. i learned at a parent training that all states have a Protection and Advocacy center to help families with IDEA, here’s the TN website: If you don’t already have an advocate, that would be the next phone call to make. If you have an inkling that things aren’t being done in your child’s best interest, an advocate will be able to tell you how the law applies in TN. good luck!
          Misty recently posted…It’s Yard Sale Time!My ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 6:45 amReplyCancel

          • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Misty, for replying to this one – I wasn’t sure (because I’m reliant upon smarter people like YOU for these things). I really appreciate your response to her. xo
            Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 22, 2014 – 8:05 pm

  • Kathy Radigan - Kristi you really got me with this one!!! I can relate to every emotion you expressed so beautifully. I love the pictures of Tucker and wish him and you much luck as you enter this new adventure!!! Love you!
    Kathy Radigan recently posted…A Mother’s TouchstoneMy ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 11:55 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, Kathy, thank you. I hope kindergarten is okay for him. I’m really nervous about it. Hopefully his team will be as amazing as his preschool team. xo and big love right back to you, my lovely friend.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 12:03 pmReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - All I can think of right now – besides being extraordinarily happy for you and Mr. T – is that there are countless parents out there who need to read this. Who need to know that a diagnosis is just the place to start.That there is hope for boundless growth. I’ll do my best to spread it around.

    I hope, hope, hope that the kindergarten team is just as supportive and amazing Kristi.June 21, 2014 – 12:28 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, thanks, Kelly. I hope kindergarten teachers and therapists are amazing too. I’m scared though! And big thanks for being so happy for little Tucker and our family! It’s a big deal. :)
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 12:10 amReplyCancel

  • Michelle Liew - Ah! Congrats, Tucker!! And Kristi, this almost made me cry, honestly. Beautiful.
    Michelle Liew recently posted…When We Humbly AskMy ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 12:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Michele @ A Storybook Life - Congrats on Tucker’s graduation! What a story of pride and success and growth – not to be stopped here. Hooray for celebrations!June 21, 2014 – 1:39 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks so much, Michele!! Here’s to celebrations. You’ve got so many of your own coming up – and I can’t WAIT to catch up!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 12:26 amReplyCancel

  • Dana - Happy graduation to Tucker! And to you, Kristi. I’m celebrating with you and your family xoxoJune 21, 2014 – 2:04 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Kristi, OMG – How did I not know you were going to be practically in my backyard??? Lancaster is like an hour from me – maybe 90 minutes. Holy cow what a near miss!!!

    Meanwhile, this is the the best TToT list EVER and I think I cried the whole way through – what a wonderful wonderful journey. So happy for all of you! Please tell Tucker congratulations and big hugs from all of us!June 21, 2014 – 2:19 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - NO WAY! I should have said something earlier. We booked this trip with Tucker’s BFF back in maybe February as part of their grad present. I can’t believe you’re so close! If you feel like driving down to see Thomas (does Zilla like Thomas???) tomorrow, email me and I’ll send you my phone number! And I’ll definitely tell Tucker congratulations. He’s so excited and thank you thank you!!!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 12:37 amReplyCancel

  • Katie @ Pick Any Two - Tearing up while reading this post. Congrats to both Tucker and you. So much goodness to celebrate!
    Katie @ Pick Any Two recently posted…Feel Good Friday: Every Woman Has a StoryMy ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 3:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Julie Chenell DeNeen - Yea for preschool graduations!! He is so stinkin’ adorable!June 21, 2014 – 4:19 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - I’m crying here! This is a very awesome list of awesome thankfulness. There’s almost not enough words to say it. Thinking of you and your graduate and your bounce house and your awesome family!
    Tamara recently posted…Like a Hug and a Pint of Ben & Jerry’s After a Long Day..My ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 4:29 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thanks Tamara! A big thankfulness for sure this week. Hard to believe it’s been two years since I took baby Tucker to preschool for the first time and cried in the parking lot for like 20 minutes! I guess we’ve both come a long way….
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 9:56 amReplyCancel

  • Emily - Oddly enough, I remember “Big Dude’s” preschool graduation pretty vividly and it was 11 years ago! I remember feeling grateful for the amazing teachers and therapists he had – recognizing how far he had come, but also how far he had to go. And BTW, I’m still in touch with several of his therapists from the “early days” and they LOVE seeing the BIG GUY/MAN he has become.:) I was also very emotional that day of preschool graduation (probably bc I was preggo with Little Dude at the time, but still, I’m sure I would have been crying anyway). Congrats to Tucker and all of you — those smiling photos say it all! Enjoy – xo
    Emily recently posted…Is That A Giant Peach?!?My ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 4:45 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, Emily – I LOVE that you’re still in touch with several of BD’s therapists from the early days. I really hope to stay in touch with Tucker’s team, too. They’re such amazing people who do jobs I’d NEVER have been able to handle. And I can just picture you pg with LD and crying. Was it the slide show? For me, it was totally the slide show.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 9:58 amReplyCancel

  • Kristi - What a beautiful post, and congratulations to Tucker. What a great advocate you are for him! I love the “TuckTalk” paper.
    Kristi recently posted…Ten Things of Thankful: A More-than-One-Week EditionMy ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 4:58 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks so much Kristi! I love the Tuck Talk paper, too. I am so glad I have it to remember how far we’ve come. I hope you’re having a great weekend!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 8:36 pmReplyCancel

  • Val Newman - He’s adorable and you are a wonderful mother.

    ValJune 21, 2014 – 6:16 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, thanks, Val! I agree he’s adorable! Wonderful mother – it doesn’t always feel that way but as long as he thinks so, I guess I’m onto something right?
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 11:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - You are indeed totally blessed. Huge congrats to Tucker on this amazing accomplishment. Now we may need to hold each other’s hands for the fall and kindergarten!! ;)
    Janine Huldie recently posted…School’s Out for Summer TToT StyleMy ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 7:40 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Janine,
      We most definitely will. I’m so glad to know we can and that Emma’s and Tucker’s birthdays are so close together so we can panic at the same time (and rejoice at the same time). Hope you had a great weekend!!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 11:31 pmReplyCancel

  • Natalie M - Such a beautiful well written piece. Thank you so much for posting this. You have given me hope at a time in my life when I need it the most. You and your gorgeous little boy are such an inspiration :-) June 21, 2014 – 7:51 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you so much, Natalie. I hope that you’re okay!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 11:32 pmReplyCancel

      • Natalie M - Thanks Kristi, lets just say I was having a really bad day when I read your post and it really cheered me up and gave me hope. I feel, I am somewhere near the start of your journey and I was told by one of our therapists, it will be a long road ahead. We are waiting on dx. Just told our son had severe speech and communication delay :( Can I just ask, we are from UK, where I think we are far behind you in terms of early intervention, what kind of intervention did they do in Tucker’s class? Just wondering if there was anything more I could push for, or look for independently.
        Thanks for being so awesome and making us Mums, smile :) June 26, 2014 – 3:44 pmReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - Natalie, so, I’m honestly not sure about the UK. We entered a thing here called Child Find and Early Intervention based on the doctor finally admitting that Tucker had a severe speech delay (it was Big, if that helps)…. we never really got the dx but I know it matters for some states and countries more than others. I guess the best thing I know how to do is to make your son’s doctor give you some options, because that’s where it started with here. Getting into the programs was a pain in the butt, but once we were in, it went much more smoothly. For Tucker’s class, they didn’t even care about the doctor evaluations, but they came to our home (his future teachers) and did their own evaluation. So he got services based more on their inputs than on his doctors. Is there some type of school thing there where they need to provide care?
          Kristi Campbell recently posted…8 ways to foster self compassion. Or, how not to be, or raise, an asshole.My ProfileJune 27, 2014 – 11:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Lizzi Rogers - Ahhh beautiful Tucker. I am happy to see you two smiling and enjoying yourselves doing important Spending Time Happy Together. What a great post to be able to write this week.June 21, 2014 – 8:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Clark Scottroger - very coolJune 21, 2014 – 8:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah - Yay for Tucker! Yay for milestones and celebrations! Yay for teachers who care!June 21, 2014 – 10:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Jean Baldridge Yates - this is a wonderful, beautiful amazing post which totally fills me with joy.
    love. jean xoxox Congratulations! Love! June 21, 2014 – 11:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Louise - Congratulations to Tucker on the milestone – and to you and family who have so obviously been there to support him.

    This was a beautiful post – all the fears and misplaced self-doubts of parenthood when it doesn’t go quite as initially imagined.

    I think I’ve mentioned once before we have close friends trying to diagnose/figure out the issues with their second child – now almost 2. When they are ready to … imagine life as it might be rather than how they’d thought it would be … I’m going to suggest they read your blog. Or maybe sooner if I get the chance. This post is beautifully descriptive in how you write about the dawning realization about the challenges Tucker would face – I don’t honestly know how I’d have handled it.

    I hope you have a great weekend trip and proper graduation celebration!
    Louise recently posted…TTOT Summer’s HereMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 12:08 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you so much, Louise! I do remember you mentioning your friends. I hope they get some answers (and at least early intervention if need be if not answers). Good luck on your test this week (not that you need it but luck is always helpful right?). We did ride a roller coaster about 17 times today so his celebration weekend is going well!!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 11:41 pmReplyCancel

  • cyndy - I love this post! Congrats to Tucker, he is awesome! (love his name, btw)June 22, 2014 – 12:16 amReplyCancel

  • Dyanne @ I Want Backsies - Onward and upward, Tucker! You are an awesome kid with a terrific gang of superheroes leading you on. Go conquer kindergarten, buddy!
    Dyanne @ I Want Backsies recently posted…Ten Things Of Thankful, All Rolled Up Into OneMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 5:26 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Dyanne! I hope he will totally conquer kindergarten! Time flies. Those people who said so were right, apparently.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 11:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Echo - This is wonderful, Kristi! Definitely something to celebrate! I know how proud, thankful and blessed you feel and that is amazing!
    Echo recently posted…Selfish Sunday!My ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 8:14 pmReplyCancel

  • Denise Farley - I LOVE Tucker’s t shirt! They make them for adults right? lol A joyful time Kristi. You and and Robert have a beautiful son. He looks a lot like Robert but for sure has your eyes and smile:) Congrats on this most wonderful milestone! June 22, 2014 – 9:07 pmReplyCancel

  • Alexa - I don’t even really know where to begin. I am so inspired by this post. By your love and dedication, your concern, your fears coming true… and then allowing others to come in and help you through the unknown. I’m proud of both of you on his preschool graduation. And can I please go ahead and RSVP for his High School graduation, because if that’s how you did preschool, I want to be there for the magnificent celebration that is awaiting us for HS!!! :-) I think it’s awesome you celebrated him like that. He deserves it.
    Alexa recently posted…Ten Things of Thankful {Family Reunion Style!}My ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 11:04 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hehe, Alexa,
      Yes, you’re on the list for high school graduation! I know – it’s a little over the top for preschool graduation but the poor little guy worked SO HARD. The PAC program is super-intense and hard for them. But it works, and it worked, so he bounced and played and I think he deserves it, too. Thank you.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 11:57 pmReplyCancel

  • Shay from Trashy Blog - Aw, Kristi, this post made me cry! Congratulations to Tucker!!
    Shay from Trashy Blog recently posted…Ice Cream TruckMy ProfileJune 22, 2014 – 11:09 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - Oh, how I love this! Those pictures of Tucker are so beautiful. I know that leaving preschool is hard and sad and scary. But, I also know that Tucker has a great support system and a mom who is beyond wonderful. He will be fine and so will you! Hugs to you my friend!
    Lisa @ Golden Spoons recently posted…Ten Things About Dad {Tuesday Ten LinkUp}My ProfileJune 23, 2014 – 11:21 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks so much, Lisa! Leaving preschool IS sad and scary, but I hope kindergarten brings magic as well as better handwriting! Thanks for the hugs and right back at you!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Autism and Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 23, 2014 – 2:03 pmReplyCancel

  • Drun Kenman - Congrats, Tucker! He is absolutely adorable, Kristi.June 23, 2014 – 3:43 pmReplyCancel

  • zoe - Good Lord the one week I dont get to make the rounds and YOURE IN EARLY!? WTF?????

    Way to go!!!!! Looks like it was an awesome party!
    zoe recently posted…A RETIRED OLD GENTLEMANMy ProfileJune 23, 2014 – 11:00 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Zoe, I know, right? I think it’s my first early TToT ever! But I was hoping to post it the week before, so maybe it’s actually really really late. And Tuck-Man is SOOO cool and yeah, the party was amazing. It was at my friend Joanna’s house and it was awesome. The kids (and adults) had a blast!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Autism and Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 24, 2014 – 9:59 amReplyCancel

  • Linda Atwell - Out One Ear - Tucker is beautiful. You are beautiful. This is beautiful. Tucker is so lucky to have you as his mom, his team leader, his cheerleader. Happy summer to you all.
    Linda Atwell – Out One Ear recently posted…A Couple With Special Needs: In Sickness And In HealthMy ProfileJune 23, 2014 – 11:31 pmReplyCancel

  • Stephanie - Kristi – this was so beautifully put. I know you (in my short knowing you time) to be hilarious and self-depracating but oh my goodness, above all else you are such a good mom. Even above your amazing writing that makes me laugh and teary (sometimes at the same time) – I know you are blessed by Tucker but he is also so lucky to have you. You put your whole heart out there and wow!June 23, 2014 – 11:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Lana - Congratulations to all of you! I LOVE the pictures of your son’s smiling face, especially the one on the beach. This post made me cry, because it reminds me so much of my nephew. He is about to turn 15 and has come so far. Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful son and your story with all of us!
    Lana recently posted…They Left Me For The SunshineMy ProfileJune 24, 2014 – 1:52 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Lana! I love the beach one the most, too. I wish it were more in focus but that always seems to be the way – the happiest face photo is the blurry smudgy one… Love that it reminds you of your nephew – so glad to hear he’s come so far!! And thank you very much for your sweet comment and for reading.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Autism and Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 24, 2014 – 10:55 amReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - You are such a good mom Kristi. Really. Look at that smile on his face that just oozes from that beautiful happy heart. You give him the strength that he needs and he gives it to you. You’re a kick ass team.
    Be proud of him and you too.
    You are good people who are changing the way that some people perceive those with autism.
    Nailed it.
    Go Tucker!!!
    Kimberly recently posted…Building Muscles To Fight DepressionMy ProfileJune 24, 2014 – 7:52 amReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - I read this post the other day. You know what a pain it is to try commenting from the iPhone. But then when you come back you forget everything you were going to say. Anway way, one thing I remember is that I absolutely LOVE “nack followed by a sniff”. I love all the pictures too. Happy pre-school graduation to Tucker <3
    Kenya G. Johnson recently posted…Author to Author: Paying it ForwardMy ProfileJune 24, 2014 – 11:05 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I know! I read too many of yours, and everybody’s on the phone and ugh. But thanks so much for coming back. That means a lot to me you know. He STILL does the “nack followed by a sniff” – it’s cute but um, yeah. I really am thankful you came back to comment, Kenya! Thanks to the grad congrats!!!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Autism and Preschool GraduationMy ProfileJune 24, 2014 – 11:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Nicki Gilbert - Congrats!! Preschool graduations are always awesome and special but this one… a gazillion shades of awesome and special :). Your little guy is amazing, Kristi, but also because his mom is amazing. Keep celebrating! Sending so much love to you all xoJune 24, 2014 – 2:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah @ LeftBrainBuddha - Congrats to Tucker and congrats to you, mama! :)
    Sarah @ LeftBrainBuddha recently posted…10 Ways to Teach Mindfulness to KidsMy ProfileJune 25, 2014 – 1:14 amReplyCancel

  • Anna Fitfunner - Hi Kristi: great post, as usual. That was one rocking party Tucker had!

    I also read a bit in the comments about your kindergarten concerns, and they reminded me of what we went through with our oldest son (ASD diagnosis). We went with a full-inclusion program, which worked well for our son from a social perspective. Ultimately, by the time that we got to middle school we needed a small group autism classroom, but he really enjoyed himself with his NT peers in full-inclusion grades K-5. We wound up moving after 5th grade, and we had 20 of his buddies show up for his going away party.

    So, another perspective to think about over the summer….

    Hope you have fun this weekend!June 25, 2014 – 1:38 amReplyCancel

  • Carol Cassara - Congratulations to Tucker!
    Carol Cassara recently posted…How smart is YOUR dog?My ProfileJune 25, 2014 – 10:23 amReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - SQUEEEEE!!!!!! What a beautiful tribute to the journey you and that sweet precious boy have endured and triumphed in!!! What a celebration!!! Well earned, indeed. XOXO
    Chris Carter recently posted…Words of Encouragement for a 16 Year OldMy ProfileJune 25, 2014 – 11:18 amReplyCancel

  • WendysHat - Congratulations! I’ve been here before and he’s now 26yrs old. Life does move on and everything will be just fine.June 25, 2014 – 7:04 pmReplyCancel

  • Liv BySurprise - Congratulations!June 26, 2014 – 1:01 amReplyCancel

  • Jolene Philo - Thank you so much for sharing this post at the link share. What a tribute to the teachers and therapists who have worked with your little boy. As a former educator, I know that the hearts of the people who work with your son melted as they read this post. What a blessing your family has been to them!June 26, 2014 – 2:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Roshni - Such a handsome boy!! Congratulations to him and all of you!
    Roshni recently posted…The first day of karate class!My ProfileJune 26, 2014 – 4:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Elizabeth - You are beautiful and so is your boy. Love this post!June 26, 2014 – 10:37 pmReplyCancel

  • Jessica - All of those milestones seem so much bigger when it takes so much work to get there don’t they? Love seeing his happy face after graduation. I’m sure you were smiling just as big!July 22, 2014 – 8:56 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I was smiling huge huge. And maybe um, you know. Crying a little bit too. Thanks Jessica and yeah, they do seem bigger when the work to get there is so hard, and intense. So worth it though.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 22, 2014 – 8:07 pmReplyCancel

There’s this pretty cool tagging exercise going around in which writers talk about why they do what they do, and share their writing processes. It’s my turn! Ok fine, it was my turn a while ago but we had Important Life things going on, such as Tucker’s Preschool Graduation, which included out-of-town guests, a rockin’ party, and a […]

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  • NJ @ A Cookie Before Dinner - I am so glad you did this! I tagged Alison and it is fun to see this travel!

    I end up sending myself a lot of voice messages when inspiration strikes. It took a bit of time, but my idea bank is over flowing at this point. It’s nice not to struggle for content anymore. Now, I struggle for time to write it instead.
    NJ @ A Cookie Before Dinner recently posted…Christmas In July: 10 Things To Do NowMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 4:27 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m glad I did it, too, NJ! I didn’t realize that you’d tagged Alison so really I should thank you because she then tagged me! I like the idea of a voice mail message to myself. So often, the emails to myself are too cryptic and I can’t remember what I meant to say. And yeah, I hear you on finding the time to write, too…
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 4:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - First, I am completely honored about what you said about me. I’m not just saying that. No one has ever said I’m good at life before and that really means a lot to me!! And I heart you huge right back! Second, I laughed OUT LOUD (for real) at your line, “I’m working on not being an asshole.” That just made my day so thank you. And third, oh what would I do without your pictures? The way you depicted your writing process was just perfect and so YOU.:) BTW, I didn’t promote this post too much (it was published on Brain Child earlier this week), but I’ll give you a link here because I kind of think it ties in to the Our Land series. I’m not saying you should publish it, but I wrote about this little girl because she helped me see things in perspective even more than having my own son with medical issues. Here’s the link:
    Emily recently posted…Little Dude Goes Back to Camp…and Back To Being A Kid AgainMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 4:33 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Emily, I love adore love huge love your Brain Child piece. Wow. Heartbreaking and heartwarming and I’d LOVE to run it on Our Land. And what I said about you is absolutely true – I think you rock at life. BTW, was getting in Brain Child hard? I really want to be there (although I haven’t written anything for them or anything). I just want to be in BC. Like the cool kids.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 5:19 pmReplyCancel

      • Emily - Like I said before, of course you can run it on Our Land – I’d be honored (again) as always….As for Brain Child, I guess it didn’t seem that hard because it was the only piece I ever submitted to them. I suppose I thought it “fit” for their publication and alas, they agreed. Even though they say they pay, they didn’t. They only pay if you’re in the print version but they said this would be a good stepping stone for me to get in there. Meanwhile, I can’t think of anything else to write for them at the moment so oh well. But in all seriousness, you’d have no trouble at all writing something for them – they’d totally accept something of yours. I personally guarantee it! :)
        Emily recently posted…Little Dude Goes Back to Camp…and Back To Being A Kid AgainMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 5:32 pmReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - YAY thanks and of course anybody trolling these comments STOP READING NOW OR ABOVE and read Emily’s post on Our Land instead!?!?!? :D
          I have no idea what to write for them. I think it’s the name “Brain Child” that makes me want to say I’m published there. Weird or whatever true.
          Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 11:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia @ Menopausal Mother - OMG I had no idea you were tagged so many times for this! I can see why—because you are so damn good! Thank you for the awesome shout out. You absolutely ROCKED this tag game and I am DYIING LAUGHING over your last 2 drawings about trying to be creative then switching over to Facebook…sooooo me! Love you, Lady! <3
    Marcia @ Menopausal Mother recently posted…Why I Hate Horror MoviesMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 4:43 pmReplyCancel

  • Joan Stommen - I was tagged awhile back and freaked out cause there was a deadline! I like your approach better….getting around to it…or not! The line I love best here is “I’m inspired by lightness and darkness, both inside and outside myself.” What a beautiful way to express what it means being a writer! This was a fun piece to read…you use humor and honesty really well!July 18, 2014 – 4:44 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks so much, Joan! In all honesty, I do better with a deadline because, as you can see, I just wait and wait to post when there’s no pressure. I think the lightness and darkness in and outside of ourselves is something that all writers can relate to. I’m glad you did.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 6:22 pmReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - You know I love you so very much and I thoroughly enjoyed this deeper look into how you think and how true wheel spin to produce such awesome writing and pure genius here all the time. To all those that tagged you thank you to them, becaus I seriously can’t believe you hadn’t already done this blog tour slr eady, but still so glad you did, because like I said I very much enjoyed your answers here :)
    Janine Huldie recently posted…Today It’s My SITS Girls Day!My ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 4:52 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Janine, happy SITS day!!! I can’t believe I haven’t done it until now, either and yeah, no genius here at all but thanks for pretending that there is!!!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 12:08 amReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - LOL to #4. That’s how I’m feeling but today I’m actually getting around to reading some posts. And I ACTUALLY closed facebook so I don’t hear any bings and bongs of people responding. I’m alone for three and a half more days. Do you think I could write a book in that time? Sure would be nice.
    Kenya G. Johnson recently posted…I can’t sleep under these conditions…My ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 5:00 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I get around (usually mostly sometimes almost always sometimes) to reading the posts. It’s the whole Facebook BLEEPS and BLOOPS while trying to be inspired. And looking at the clock because it’s usually like around now (12:13am) or later.
      And dude! YES. You ahve 3 1/2 days? You could totally get a draft at least? Um, maybe. Ugh. Enjoy the silence, no matter whether you do or not. Silence is awesome, even when it’s not. Ok it’s not awesome when it’s not because night time should mean snores and checking on wee ones and all that… but those moments BEFORE bed? DUDE! you could totally get some 1/2-drafts done? Or at least catch up on non-kid friendly TV ;)
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 12:15 amReplyCancel

  • yvonne - Ha, ha Kiristi – your writing process is a lot like mine! Both the “Facebook is fun” part and the getting ideas in the toilet. Or out walking or wherever.
    I really enjoyed learning more about your work and everything.
    And since I’m in a hotel with only 30 minutes of wifi, this comment better be short! Thanks for the nice things you said about me, and for introducing those awesome bloggers – I will check out those I don’t know soon. (When I have more than 30 minutes!)
    yvonne recently posted…I need them to respect me – is it true?My ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 5:20 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yvonne,
      YAY to having a no writing process, and doing so when inspired!!! Whoot! 30 minutes left of wifi and you commenting is the biggest compliment ever – I hope the rest of your trip is amazing. And I think you are awesome big time. Always. And will forever thank you for turning me onto the difference between self esteem and self compassion because OMG thank you. You so rock.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 1:15 amReplyCancel

  • Considerer - Um so now you have to teach me to personing, wise one…

    I think I probably maybe suck at that sometimes. But perhaps everyone does, but I’d like to be better at it.

    I like your not-a-process historical gathering of things all together in one place that I kind of knew already and am just happy when you write.

    I still think you’re better when you’re under pressure, because most of the pieces I fall hard for, you complain that you did it in a rush, in 20 minutes.

    Mostly I like you, and your writing is an added bonus :)
    Considerer recently posted…How to woo a MathGeekMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 5:23 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’d be more than happy to teach you the personing thing, once I finalize it, which is soon, I think (stay tuned). I suspect you’ve already got it though and know when you’re not.
      I am better under pressure. Always. Sadly and happily. And none, recently. Sigh. I like you, too, Lizzi. and thank you for liking me.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 1:25 amReplyCancel

      • Considerer - How long does it take? I’m a bit fascinated now. Do you feel better? How might I already got it? *confused*

        You are good under pressure. Very good. But pressure will happen and you’ll write again :) YAY LIKE!
        Considerer recently posted…Ten Things of Thankful #57My ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 10:25 amReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - It varies as far as how long it will take. You’re on the right track though. And wait. The pressure comment. Um, is that your not-so-subtle way of saying you don’t like the stuff I write when not under pressure?
          Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 11:47 amReplyCancel

          • Considerer - Ack, well it’s reassuring to know I might be on the right track. We’ll see when you let me in on the big secret :)

            Umno. I like what you write ALWAYS, I just fall in love with the stuff you write under pressure. It *gets* me right in the middle of my soul…
            Considerer recently posted…Ten Things of Thankful #57My ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 12:59 pm

  • Elizabeth - What a great idea and terrific post. Very enjoyable. I am looking forward to checking out all the other blogs. Thank you!
    Elizabeth recently posted…INTERACTIVE IEP GUIDE – FOUND ON PINTEREST THIS WEEKMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 5:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - I feel like crap now, because I was tagged and still haven’t written. Although only one person tagged me, so I still have time, right? I love your writing process; it’s working well for you! Five books? Wow. I’ll be first in line when you publish!
    Dana recently posted…I’ve always been partial to BethsMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 6:02 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dana, don’t feel like crap – I think Allison tagged me in May or something. I don’t even know because I suck at this stuff so badly. Also consider yourself tagged by moi. FIVE BOOKS that are sitting there. Unwritten and unfinished and just lying there as ideas. GAH. And I’ll hold you to that, if I ever get off my fatass and publish, m’kay?
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 1:44 amReplyCancel

  • Echo - Thank you for tagging me, although I don’t think I have a writing process, like, at all! We’ll see how this turns out though! Your illustrations always crack me up!
    Echo recently posted…Ask Away Friday: 90′s Flashback Style!My ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 6:34 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Well duh then do it like I did and say you don’t have one because hello I have no writing process. I mean real people I guess do but whatever to them and you’re welcome and I can’t wait to read what you write. About writing. Or whatever.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 1:46 amReplyCancel

  • Mike - This was great, Kristi! I send myself email notes ALL OF THE TIME! Probably bordering on OCD ha, ha :) I think your “personing” is absolutely spectacular! Not to mention your other gazillion wonderful qualities. I was most interested in #4 and I contemplated my own answer. I don’t have a process either per se. I like to write about real life experiences and often I use my photography as a foundation to write around. If that makes sense :) You know I love your cartoon drawings always! Have a wonderful, safe weekend :)
    Mike recently posted…Halloween Bark To Delight Your Sweet ToothMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 7:18 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Mike! I’m glad I’m not alone in sending myself email notes. It’s quick and easy but sometimes I have no idea what I was talking about when I read them later. And your photography is awesome so I love that you use it as a base for writing.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 1:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Lana - I think you’re amazing, and the fact that you were tagged by FIVE people is additional proof. Your blog is one of my favorites, and it was so fun to read more about you. Have a great weekend!
    Lana recently posted…Happy 95th BirthdayMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 7:31 pmReplyCancel

  • Rea - We are so much alike in our writing process. Can’t describe it enough because really, you’ve described it really well especially the “Facebook is fun” part and “I really need to write” part. HAHA. I think that you write about interesting things. All the best to you and your upcoming book! ;) July 18, 2014 – 7:54 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHAH to Facebook is fun, Rea. It really is a distraction and so easy to waste time there in those “I should write something” moments!! Thanks so much!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 1:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Michele - LOVE this post, Kristi — the list of other writers to check out, the pictures, the inspiration found while sitting on the toilet… :) Truly, the story of your evolution as a writer and blogger is inspiring to this relative newbie blogger a and the idea of making dark moments lighter is beautiful.
    Michele recently posted…Three Good Things, Vol. 1My ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 8:00 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Michele, you’re the bombdiggity! And here’s to making the darker moments lighter through our writing. Also? You may be a relative newbie blogger but you’re awesome and fabulous and I love your blog and you and you’re already doing big beautiful things with your words.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 1:52 pmReplyCancel

  • Wendy Besel Hahn - I love that you think of blog posts while on the toilet. Miss you!July 18, 2014 – 8:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Manal Gogogirl Broeckelmann - Inspiration comes at the weirdest places and you have to be prepared. I think you should write a memoir anyway. I’m your fan:)July 18, 2014 – 9:35 pmReplyCancel

  • Shay from Trashy Blog - I am just like you in that I have paper and pen with me EVERYWHERE. I can’t remember a time that I haven’t. I call all of the different versions “my little Harriet the Spy writing notebook.” I try to hide it because when I get caught whipping it out (that’s what she said), my family and friends inevitably go, “Hey! What are you writing down…are you going to write about me??” The level of anxiety/excitement depends on the person to whom I’m talking. :) And wow–you’re a great speaker! I’d have been so nervous I would have shat myself right up there on stage. I loved hearing your story!
    Shay from Trashy Blog recently posted…Morbidity ComplexMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 2:59 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Paper and pen everywhere and Harriet the Spy because fucking DUH!!! HAHAHA to them knowing you’re whipping it out. I got totally busted taking a photo of a guy at work by another sales guy so I never used the pic (even though they don’t even know I blog) because I HAD TO HAD to remember the moment. One of these days (when I’m more sure for real none of them read the blog), I’ll haveta post about it. LOVING your shorts by the way, although I often read them on my phone (sorry).
      And dude, my hands were shaking like a crack whore on um, I dunno. rehab?
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 19, 2014 – 11:05 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - I love that you did this. I did it awhile ago and it’s fun to watch it travel.
    I think I get inspiration the way you do, but never on the toilet, for some reason!
    I write whole posts in my head while staring at walls. Walls!
    I work hard at not being an asshole. Mostly it works, save for like two people on this earth.July 20, 2014 – 8:26 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I saw it a while ago as well and um, well, yeah, am doing it now so yay, right? Walls are good for posts. Here’s to not being an asshole, or at least working on not being one!!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 20, 2014 – 11:47 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah @ LeftBrainBuddha - Martin Luther, according to legend, attained his insight on the doctrine of justification by faith while “in the privy,” so you’re in good company :)
    Sarah @ LeftBrainBuddha recently posted…10 AWESOME Things About a Vacation With Kids!My ProfileJuly 20, 2014 – 9:26 amReplyCancel

  • K - Ha! I love what you said about looking back at your draft notes and being all “WTF was I thinking about”…sometimes the best ideas arise from that though!

    And I love that you write what you do…I haven’t been here nearly as much as I’ve wanted to lately but your words never fail to put a smile on my face…I still think you should publish your memoir someday! And I didn’t know you liked to write novels as well…that’s awesome!!

    xoJuly 20, 2014 – 12:04 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - K – so true though. Some of the very best ideas do come from not knowing what we wanted to talk about. And dude. You’re doing the good good thing – getting a degree and being brilliant and amazing. Also, holy crap!!! You’re going to be a junior in September right? OMG I feel so old. ;)
      well the novels… they’re simpering b/c I’m not paying any attention to them. Maybe one of these days. Maybe we should write one together.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 20, 2014 – 11:50 pmReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - “I really should be writing something … Facebook is fun.” Well I cannot stress enough how good this makes me feel. There is someone out there who is behaving in the same manner as me. God but that feels good. Oh boy. Cannot tell you how my mind wanders as I plop into my chair and so professionally face the keys …

    Thank you. When I next bang out a post I shall think of you …July 20, 2014 – 9:03 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - UGH I really should be writing something now but whatever, WINE is fun too right? I’m so happy that my flakiness (and being human) makes you feel more human because DUH facebook IS fun. oh and yeah. the mind wandering. Wait, what? What was I saying? Writing is fun? Oh. Jus got a FB notification.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 20, 2014 – 11:52 pmReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - Kristi, you are the shit!

    That is all.
    Sandy Ramsey recently posted…Because Everyone Loves a Summer BreezeMy ProfileJuly 20, 2014 – 10:06 pmReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - Ah, I love this Kristi!!! It really is those little moments that inspire that fire within that is lit by such a small flame… amazing how that happens, isn’t it?

    I love everything about this post. And everything about you.

    Keep working on that book. I too, want to write one… been thinking and praying on it for some time now.

    But priorities are mumbled jumbled… I wish I could go sit in some cottage for a month, ya know?

    In time, for you…

    And hopefully for me too.
    Chris Carter recently posted…What Teenagers Do With Their Pain: TToT: Finding the GoodMy ProfileJuly 21, 2014 – 11:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Allison McGrath Smith - I loved this. I loved your explanation of the different things you write about. I too don’t want to be defined by my status as a special needs parents, because I write about many other topics, other than autism.July 22, 2014 – 12:43 amReplyCancel

  • A Morning Grouch - i love this post. i read 90% of it the other day and then made sure to come back to it today and finish. i’m also working on not being an asshole, and send myself ridiculous emails and texts so i won’t forget an idea to write about…..which almost never transpires into a post because by the time i get the reminder i forget all context. ah well. and i agree with Manal – write a memoir!July 23, 2014 – 1:17 pmReplyCancel

  • Misty - don’t know what kind of books you’re writing, but know what you should write! you should write and illustrate a children’s book! that way kindergarteners only have to learn one name and will meet the standard for identifying the author and illustrator! i looked, once, for a social story about special needs that i could give to patty’s class. you would write an awesome-sauce special needs social story!
    Misty recently posted…What’s the connection between your child’s textbook and your child’s test scores?My ProfileJuly 23, 2014 – 5:37 pmReplyCancel

Today’s Our Land is from a new-to-me special needs advocate, Geralyn. Her post today is about raising empathy and wonder, finding solutions to challenges, and the magical powers of horses. I hope you like it as much as I do.  Hippo Therapy for Sensory Processing Disorder  I always knew I wanted to be a mother. But […]

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  • Mike - This was an absolutely wonderful guest post, Geralyn, and thank you for sharing her and Delaney with us, Kristi! I loved so many parts about this and it started with just the need to listen to Delaney. I find that to be true with all people on all levels. And it’s magnified times infinity with special needs children. This reminded me on several levels of one of my favorite movies “The Horse Whisperer.” Geralyn, that’s great that you pay it forward and what an awesome change for you to change jobs. You are so right…the miracle will never grow old. Sweet little Delaney, please always know you are loved by so many and we are so very proud of you!! There are no boundaries as to what you will accomplish our young hero!:)
    Mike recently posted…Stuffed Mushrooms On A Brisk Winter NightMy ProfileJuly 16, 2014 – 12:33 pmReplyCancel

  • Elizabeth - What a great experience! Thank you for sharing this terrific story.
    Elizabeth recently posted…SHARED INTERESTSMy ProfileJuly 16, 2014 – 2:02 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - One of my good friends is a therapist who uses equine therapy in her practice too. So amazing to hear about.
    I grew up as a horse person, but I sort of outgrew it over the years. My mom has horses so I get my fix occasionally.
    And one of my best friends’ kids has SPD. He leads a very fulfilling life but his mom tells us what it’s like for us sometimes. I remember that he had trouble with the sound my camera makes when I was taking photos of him. However, I didn’t have to stop. He knew how to make himself feel better without me stopping.
    Tamara recently posted…Nearly Wordless Wednesday: A Quirky Compilation.My ProfileJuly 16, 2014 – 3:36 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - That’s so cool that you have a good friend who uses equine therapy! I grew up as a horse person, too, but don’t really ride often any longer. And yay for your friend’s son knowing how to make himself feel better on his own – that’s big.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Equine Therapy for Sensory Processing DisorderMy ProfileJuly 17, 2014 – 12:01 pmReplyCancel

  • MyTwice BakedPotato - I loved this one :) What a great girl and fantastic family! BlessingsJuly 16, 2014 – 4:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Laura Ashley Koeneman - There is a woman in my area that does this sort of thing, except with teens with drug abuse problems. She uses the horses to help teach them some responsibility and get them physically active. It’s amazing how animals can help us in so many ways. July 16, 2014 – 4:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Aww, this truly made me smile hearing how using horses as a therapy to help her little girl with her sensory processing disorder. I tell you each week, I truly get schooled here even though I taught special education in the middle school level and can’t thank you enough Kristi for this and also special thanks to Geralyn for sharing with us today.July 16, 2014 – 5:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life - I love this! I never would have thought of equine therapy but it makes total sense…animals are wonderful therapy. It’s been proven many times over!
    Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life recently posted…Corn and Black Bean Salsa with Lime Vinaigrette {plus a Uneekee Lazy Susan Giveaway}My ProfileJuly 17, 2014 – 3:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Shay from Trashy Blog - This post is beautiful. We learn so much from our kids!
    Shay from Trashy Blog recently posted…Morbidity ComplexMy ProfileJuly 18, 2014 – 3:11 pmReplyCancel

  • K - So awesome!! I love that Delaney has gotten so much joy from her horses, and that they have been so beneficial for her…I did hippotherapy for a few years when I was her age, and I loved it too! I did it mostly to improve my balance, but you’re right — it’s spiritually and emotionally grounding as well. :) Beautiful post, thank you for sharing!July 20, 2014 – 11:54 amReplyCancel

I read something that I wrote in front of other people. As in, not just out loud to myself, late at night, in a room alone . I mean, I went on purpose and outloud - without having plastic surgery or managing to diet first or anything at all to look more like I used to, […]

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  • Mike - I just lost an entire VERY long comment due to me hitting SOME incorrect key (of which I have no idea) and was literally screaming at myself. Please know you are always a beautiful, right and perfect woman, Kristi. Multiply that times infinity the mother that I see you are to Tucker. This last weekend I was inspired to share a dark life secret of mine. What blogger folks have come to know me as on the Internet is this nice, kind person with a cute, very funny and caring Golden Retriever. That is all very true. What many learned, including yourself, was that there always has been and is a much deeper meaning to that relationship. I had a bio mother (whom I do miss terribly) tell me and her university classes that I was the ugliest baby she had ever seen. The next “mother” that entered the life picture did a lifetime a damage that wasn’t until 11 years ago, began to be repaired. That is Phoenix. So, how this relates to YOU….is NOW you understand and know how deeply beyond what you can possibly fathom how much I love and admire the mother you are to Tucker. Why you always hear me comment how right and perfect Tucker is. Because is, always has been, and always will be. His continued success…love he feels, shows and evolves to understand…is a constant testament to YOU!! I could hug you both forever and each day you make our life better. We are so deeply proud of you and you knocked that presentation out of the world!! Thank you, with love, Mike and Phoenix :)
    Mike recently posted…Lunch At The Stone House Cafe Reno, NevadaMy ProfileJuly 10, 2014 – 4:06 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I hate when I lose comments like that, Mike! Often, I can do control Z (undo) and get it back but UGH. And thank you huge big huge gigantic for your amazing words. I know that there’s a much much deeper (and, sadly, darker and horrid) meaning behind how PDawg saved you and you him and how he’s given you light and hope again, which is really everything. I am in awe of you for sharing in the first place, and, as you know, hope you will write the Our Land, when you’re ready… because fuck. Hard shit, there, dude.
      Thank you for knowing it’s not always easy, and thank you for seeing all of the hugest potentials in Tucker. He’s an AMAZING kid, but he does have his (big huge) issues. Yesterday, his sitter was really bummed because she took him to a bounce house place and he punched (OMG how does he even know this) another kid who shoved him (first so better but STILL).
      You and Phoenix make us better. Your dedication to showing him new things and life and helping him kick cancer’s ugly ass, well. We adore you.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Listen to Your Mother Video: Being a Special Needs MomMy ProfileJuly 10, 2014 – 9:10 pmReplyCancel

  • Barbara Clifton - thank you for sharing what so many of us feel but don’t talk about. July 10, 2014 – 4:07 amReplyCancel

  • Lizzi Rogers - I’m still floored by the power of your words, and their beauty (and yours) and your bravery. You’ve truly given a voice to the voiceless, and that’s so very important. Hats well and truly off to you. I’m glad you did this. I’m also glad you didn’t pass out or puke or anything :) Bravo!July 10, 2014 – 6:23 amReplyCancel

  • Robin - I haven’t seen the video yet but will. But your words are so beautiful. I think about this a lot–wondering if my worries about my son’s quirky development, and his success in the future are comparable to what a “typical” child’s mothers worries are. There are always some mom’s who look like they have it easy, and some who look, like you said, to have been dealt with more challenges. But looks, especially on social media, can be deceiving–all kids and relationships within families are complicated. Love your ending, about your sweet son, and how much he loves you for who you are, that’s pretty darn perfect in my book!July 10, 2014 – 6:48 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you huge, Robin. I think about it a lot, too. I wonder about the different worries but the bottom line is that we all worry huge, and maybe, sometimes, it’s just about different things. I have to hang onto the hope that we’re so much more alike than different – us mamas.
      I try to not dislike the moms who look like everything is so easy but gah. Social media is SO fake!!! I mean, I don’t post pics of me where I look more than usually-ugly, ya know?
      And aww! I think it’s pretty darn perfect, too, that he just loves me. Here’s to that for all of us and for everybody.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Listen to Your Mother Video: Being a Special Needs MomMy ProfileJuly 10, 2014 – 9:14 pmReplyCancel

  • Michele @ A Storybook Life - OK, “didn’t fart loudly enough for anyone to hear it” got me from the start! Your piece was beautiful and reflective and I am so glad to have shared the stage with you, and to have learned so much from you already.
    Michele @ A Storybook Life recently posted…The One Where I Spilled Secrets in Front of a Live Theater AudienceMy ProfileJuly 10, 2014 – 8:35 amReplyCancel

  • Tamara - So you did fart, right? Just not loudly enough? haha!
    I watched this this morning, actually. Yours drew tears from me. So did Kim Morand’s. Tears, I tell you!
    Tamara recently posted…Over The Top.My ProfileJuly 10, 2014 – 10:55 amReplyCancel

  • Lori Lavender Luz - Brava!

    I’m so proud to know you. And I think you’re as beautiful today as ever.
    Lori Lavender Luz recently posted…Sign Up for this Book Tour: Apart at the Seams by Melissa FordMy ProfileJuly 10, 2014 – 11:22 amReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Kristi, you always say it just perfectly and here more then ever. Seriously, I cannot say enough that you did an amazing job here and yet I know you just spoke from the heart, which is just so you always. Hugs and thank you for being you, as well as sharing a bit more with us today and always.July 10, 2014 – 11:25 amReplyCancel

  • Drun Kenman - I watched the video last night! You did well! And your words, as they often are, are amazing, heartfelt, and inspiring.July 10, 2014 – 1:40 pmReplyCancel

  • Out One Ear - Linda Atwell - love, love, love this. You say the most perfect things to touch my heart. I wish I could say them as well as you. Thanks.
    Out One Ear – Linda Atwell recently posted…A Couple With Special Needs: In Sickness And In HealthMy ProfileJuly 10, 2014 – 1:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Elizabeth - Thanks, Beautiful. I am sitting in a public library trying, failing, to not cry. This is really amazing, so perfectly saying what I have felt, the whole continuum of fear, sadness, joy, gratitude. I have gone from sadly watching other kids at his school and *seeing* what is missing in him, to seeing what he has that none of those other children will ever have. What a roller coaster!
    Your post is beautiful tribute to the hands-in-the-air ride!
    Elizabeth recently posted…UNFOGGING THE FUTUREMy ProfileJuly 10, 2014 – 2:21 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Elizabeth, I know I know – and I know that you know. The fear, sadness, joy and overwhelming gratitude are overwhelming at their best and crippling at times, too. I know you get about seeing what’s missing, and yeah, a roller coaster for sure. Here’s to riding thislife with our arms mostly in the air – I love that. Thank you.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Listen to Your Mother Video: Being a Special Needs MomMy ProfileJuly 11, 2014 – 12:21 amReplyCancel

  • Emily - Just watched…you were AWESOME as was that post. I have always had a big fear of public speaking and even though I sort of overcame it when I was in the workforce and had to give presentations, I still avoid it as much as possible. I’ve never read anything of mine out loud to an audience, other than one time when I took a writing pitch conference, where we had to read our pitches to the class. I really admire you doing this and one day maybe I’ll be courageous enough to give it a try.:)
    Emily recently posted…Little Dude Goes Back to Camp…and Back To Being A Kid AgainMy ProfileJuly 10, 2014 – 4:08 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Emily,
      You would not believe how badly my hands were shaking – not only then, but in the readthrough, the audition, all of it. It was a little horrifying actually but I’m so glad I did it. I kept thinking that by the show, I’d lose weight, do something about wrinkles, etc, but when it came time to do it, it was just amazing. I would never think I’d have done it, but am so so glad I did. Please think about it for next year. you will be amazing. you ARE amazing. And, thank you, huge, for the support and sweet comment. xo
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Listen to Your Mother Video: Being a Special Needs MomMy ProfileJuly 11, 2014 – 12:24 amReplyCancel

  • Angela McKeown Momopolize - I’m so happy the videos are available not since I couldn’t make it to the show! You did such a wonderful job!!!!
    Angela McKeown Momopolize recently posted…Life’s a Gas and Then You PooMy ProfileJuly 10, 2014 – 6:18 pmReplyCancel

  • Grown Ups & Downs - Great work – great words! July 10, 2014 – 6:35 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - You were awesome and that piece was amazing! Brought tears and smiles!
    Lisa @ Golden Spoons recently posted…It’s Hard to Be the “Bad Guy”My ProfileJuly 10, 2014 – 9:44 pmReplyCancel

  • marcia @ Menopausal Mother - Oh Kristi, you did it to me again–made me all mushy and teary-eyed! This is painfully beautiful. And you totally rocked it at LTYM–you have great stage presence! XO
    marcia @ Menopausal Mother recently posted…As Seen On TV……My ProfileJuly 11, 2014 – 1:15 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - You are awesome. That’s all. :) July 11, 2014 – 3:41 pmReplyCancel

  • Linda Roy - Just beautiful Kristi. So well done and so well read. I remember when you read it to us during the video chat then night before your audition. Even more wonderful watching you read it.July 11, 2014 – 9:08 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you so much, Linda. I love this comment, and it feels so so long ago when I practiced for you guys. Thanks for listening and encouraging me to do it. I really wanted to chicken out, except I didn’t want to chicken out and really really appreciated your support (and can I say “really” any more times in a comment reply?).
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Listen to Your Mother Video: Being a Special Needs MomMy ProfileJuly 13, 2014 – 11:34 pmReplyCancel

  • thedoseofreality - So beautiful and amazing Kristi. Your honesty and your words left me in tears. I am so proud that you shared this incredible message with the world. All who read or heard it are better for it. :)-Ashley
    thedoseofreality recently posted…Pinterest Nightmare #735: Solafeet Portable Foot TannerMy ProfileJuly 12, 2014 – 10:30 amReplyCancel

  • Julie Chenell DeNeen - Wow. Your words are powerful when you write them, but then to hear them too? Absolutely stunning.July 12, 2014 – 12:48 pmReplyCancel

  • zoe - wow, kristi! EVEN better than the practice on vid chat and I got all teary on that one!!!!! Lovely, simply lovely, zoe
    zoe recently posted…Poetry, Angst, and the Skippy Tapes at the TToTMy ProfileJuly 12, 2014 – 3:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Laurie Hollman, Parental Intelligence - It’s so great for all the viewers that you were on that show. Your words are so important for other parents to hear. How your emotions grew and grew and how in love you are with being your child’s mother, the mother you have become.
    Laurie Hollman, Parental Intelligence recently posted…FAVORITE FAMILY VACATION RECIPE: STAYING HOMEMy ProfileJuly 13, 2014 – 3:30 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks so much, Laurie. I will always be in love with being my kid’s mom, but it’s true that before I had him, I was not sure about being able to love him. If even one person sees that and knows that it’s still fun and amazing? Then the time spent on SM is worth it. Thanks so much.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Listen to Your Mother Video: Being a Special Needs MomMy ProfileJuly 13, 2014 – 11:49 pmReplyCancel

  • My Inner Chick - **You’ll refrain from falling to your knees because your son is watching you.***

    This line truly got to me.

    Fabulous, powerful video.

    Thank you for sharing your heart w/ honesty, love, humor, rawness, and insight.
    My Inner Chick recently posted…I Was Blind, But Now I SeeMy ProfileJuly 13, 2014 – 5:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I love that you loved that line and that it got to you. I so clearly remember being at the doctor’s office (and at early intervention AND when the teachers came to our home) and almost almost almost falling, but looking over at my boy, and knowing he was looking at me, and saying “Ok. What should we do?” instead. It was a big moment, and continues to be one… so I thank you huge for commenting on it and recognizing its import.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Listen to Your Mother Video: Being a Special Needs MomMy ProfileJuly 13, 2014 – 11:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Nathaniel Kidd - Your words are so profound and powerful. I enjoyed the video. You have a way of connecting with your audience. Your message is powerful and empowering. Thanks for sharing.
    Nathaniel Kidd recently posted…Frugal Saving Tips While You Are On VacationMy ProfileJuly 14, 2014 – 2:45 amReplyCancel

  • Anna Jeanine - Beautiful speech, and what an amazing story! July 14, 2014 – 4:13 amReplyCancel

  • Salma Dinani Dewji - That’s a very powerful post, I’ve never really read it in words like them. Thanks for sharing this. July 14, 2014 – 5:12 amReplyCancel

  • Jhanis - Just saw the video today Kristi and oh my heart, I’m trying not to cry. Just beautiful! And the fact that you are such an inspiration to many makes you more special! Hugs to Tucker!
    Jhanis recently posted…Small House Decorating Ideas That Will Save Your SanityMy ProfileJuly 15, 2014 – 3:41 amReplyCancel

  • Echo - I totally would have farted or croaked while trying to talk. I know it. You are so amazing, Kristi! Just awesome.
    Echo recently posted…Handmade by MegExpressionsMy ProfileJuly 16, 2014 – 12:23 amReplyCancel

  • Norine of Science of Parenthood - What a beautiful post.
    Norine of Science of Parenthood recently posted…Mommy Math: Summer “Fun” EditionMy ProfileJuly 16, 2014 – 9:59 amReplyCancel

  • Yvonne - I just got a chance to see this today Kristi and wow, you did so well! Your words at powerful and you spoke so well too. Like most other people have written, I almost cried. (And it was great to see you and hear you talk.)
    Yvonne recently posted…Wonderful Women around the WorldMy ProfileJuly 16, 2014 – 12:50 pmReplyCancel

  • Anna Fitfunner - Yup. It’s going to be just fine. You totally got this.July 18, 2014 – 2:02 amReplyCancel

  • Kathy Radigan - Kristi this is just perfect. Thank you for voicing so much of what I too feel as a mom to s special needs child. Love you!July 20, 2014 – 7:47 amReplyCancel

  • Misty - omg, your post should come with a tear-jerker warning! was there a dry eye in the house? the lady after you, oh my, i couldn’t make it all the way through her speech! you ladies are the bravest of the brave.

    i’m so happy you wrote and shared this with the world. it was like you had peaked inside my to the deepest, darkest, most hidden places of my soul.

    Misty recently posted…Poor Achievement of Special Ed Students, HogwashMy ProfileJuly 22, 2014 – 8:50 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - well, my eyes weren’t dry… for sure there. Oh and the one you’re talking about after me is my sweet friend Michele Vaughn and she’s awesome. You should listen to her video – after all of that, she’s now pregnant, with a baby girl, and feeling good. Plus, she’s awesome. And yeah, here’s to our dark insides friend xo.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 22, 2014 – 10:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Steph - You made me cry. That was beautiful.
    Steph recently posted…1500 followers? Giveaway time!My ProfileJuly 22, 2014 – 11:14 amReplyCancel

  • Sylvia - So sweet and so true! I remember how frustrating it was for me that no one would agree with me that something might be wrong. It was so obvious, yet everyone thought that by denying it they were making me feel better! I needed support and answers not denial! Your public speaking is awesome! You’re so brave! Great job Kristi!
    Sylvia recently posted…An Incredibly Awesome, Monumental, Incident Free DayMy ProfileJuly 22, 2014 – 12:17 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh Sylvia, I remember those frustrating times when we KNOW we KNOW and people want to be encouraging, and well, they are and they’re not. Because we know… Thank you so much for your amazing lovely comment.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 22, 2014 – 10:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Foxy Wine Pocket - Wow, Kristi, just wow. Your words are so beautiful and powerful. And hearing you speak them was absolutely amazing. xoxoJuly 23, 2014 – 1:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Misty - Thank you for that!!!! It brought tears to my eyes. I just got back from a family vacation that had me feeling exposed. We drove 11 hours for my son to be so sensory overloaded that he could hardly function at times. The feeling of people staring at your child in disapproval when you know your child is struggling more then these people (strangers and family) could ever imagine is heartbreaking. Trying so desperately to find the magical solution to help their little bodies feel okay in environments that most don’t think twice about. When you find the magical combination and your child begins to smile, you know that smile that instantly melts your heart! That smile helps the stares and mumbling disappear and all to feel right in that moment. The pride that you have for your child whom has just overcome more than they should ever have to, is radiating. I may not always like it, but I love being a special needs mom!July 23, 2014 – 2:04 pmReplyCancel

This was originally published when my blog was a tiny 5-week old baby and about two people read it (thanks, Sara and Henriette). Because I’m extremely lazy busy, getting ready to celebrate Tucker’s fifth (OMG) birthday on Friday at the beach (whoot!), I figured I’d put it out there again with some updates, like the […]

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  • Sara - As soon as I read this I thought of this old Woody Allen routine he did about his appliances ganging up against him. You must hear it: 9, 2012 – 11:35 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Sara, that is funny! Thanks so much for sharing it. I’d never heard it before. Hilarious! :) November 10, 2012 – 6:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Jennifer - Haha I just read this one. Missed it before its so funny. How do you draw the pictures?November 10, 2012 – 8:49 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Jennifer, I just use Photoshop with a mouse. I’m sure there are a million easier ways.November 12, 2012 – 6:11 pmReplyCancel

  • thebeesleybuzz - love those cartoon pictures – so funny xNovember 12, 2012 – 3:38 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Thank you so much! Just tried to comment on your homeschool post, but was unable to prove that I’m not a robot. I did try though. A whole bunch of times! Thanks again!November 12, 2012 – 6:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Momito - Very funny! I love your pictures! Hopefully your appliances are working now!November 14, 2012 – 12:45 amReplyCancel

    • admin - $300 later and they seem to be fine. Sigh.March 11, 2013 – 8:10 amReplyCancel

  • Pink Ninja Media - You seriously almost made me pee in my pants!November 20, 2012 – 1:53 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Thanks Pink Ninja! :D March 11, 2013 – 8:10 amReplyCancel

  • Jen - Hey Isaiah stuck his hand in a moving fan this summer and cut his finger, so there’s always that.
    Plus you need to win an award for hystericalness. Fer real. Cause dude. There is no one like you on the planet. And I think you should have kept the pooing coffee pots just for the laughs. I wish my appliances talked…..March 11, 2013 – 1:18 amReplyCancel

    • admin - OUCH to Isaiah sticking his hand in a moving fan. OW. Maybe you’re right and I should have kept the pooping coffee pot. And thanks HUGE for the awesome loves with the award comment. I wish! :D March 11, 2013 – 8:09 amReplyCancel

  • Charm AndGlam - LOL love the photos! :D August 31, 2013 – 2:39 pmReplyCancel

  • christine - Your parents’ appliances don’t stop working because things were made better back then. Our gadgets may have fancy computers and flashy settings, but they suck and break way too fast. When we bought our first house, it still had the original refrigerator built by Ford (It had a Ford label right on the front.) in 1970 or so. If finally broke and we had to replace it in 2003. The compressor in the one we bought went up in a burst of flame exactly 5 years later, 3 days after the warranty ran out. New appliances suck. It’s not you. Well, except for that dumb finger in the fan move. What the heck were you thinking?? :)

    Have a great birthday party at the beach!
    christine recently posted…Wordless Wednesday: I Could Make a Calendar. Or Two.My ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 12:16 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - So true about the stupid fancy boards and settings and all of that. And I love love the idea of your supercool fridge having a big old Ford label on it! It burst in flames though – the new one? So freaking typical. I can’t believe how crappy these appliances have been!!! Oh. The finger thing. Um, yeah. lalallallalall
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Appliances Hate MeMy ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 11:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Mike - While this is NOT funny for you this was hysterical to read because of your cartoon pics which I will always be a HUGE FAN of! :) I am sorry for your appliance battle and yes not a good idea to stick your digits in the vicinity of spinning things. I think there is a lot of truth to what Christine said in that appliances are made with too many internal components these days. Hey, when they work…it’s great! But, as your trials and tribulations show it is frustration. And, yes I’ve been there! Coffee poo…still laughing at that! Speaking of home repair the guys will be here shortly to fix my sliding glass door. I went to open it (it had long since been screaming for help) last week and it wouldn’t. Phoenix looked down at his paw tapping his “watch” saying, “I really gotta go potty…” LOL :)
    Mike recently posted…Cancer Free Contest Winners!My ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 1:09 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thanks Mike!! I think so too – about the appliances being made crappier and dumber with all of their bells and whistles. Here’s to your new sliding glass door not shattering next time you open it. It probably would if I did…
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Appliances Hate MeMy ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 11:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerri - I’m cracking up because I read this post before I knew it was okay to comment on another person’s blog. Yeah, I’m a fool. Have you heard of Kureg? I don’t drink coffee but I hear it is easier than having the pot break on you. Or you could go back to the perculator
    Kerri recently posted…Being okay doesn’t mean being satisfiedMy ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 1:17 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Are you serious??? You found this when I was a baby? Remind me when you started blogging – I always thought yours was so OLD when I found it?? Um, yeah, Kureg. My dad and stepmom have one but it’s one cup at a time. I like pouring my big old thermal full of like 2 cups and having it stay hot while Tucker tells me what I have to have to have to do to “get ready” each day.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Appliances Hate MeMy ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 11:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Melissa Senecal - My problem is my electronics!! My appliances are old so maybe that’s a good thing but electronics in this house are possessed! Love the cartoon pics!
    Melissa Senecal recently posted…Medical proof that I (was) heartlessMy ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 1:31 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Except for the coffee pot and toasters oiur stuff may be related. We wrote that HVAC check about four years ago. Of all the snow we don’t get, the day it decided to stop working Christopher and I had come in from playing in it. We spent the rest of the weekend under the covers.July 2, 2014 – 2:00 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - UGH to the dang appliances, Kenya (or Kanye heheeh). What is up with this stuff? It’s like it’s programed to break, once the warranty is over!.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Appliances Hate MeMy ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 11:39 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah - I concur. Your appliances hate you. Or, you have a ghost. Have you considered that option?
    Sarah recently posted…TToT32: After the StormMy ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 2:45 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - A ghost would be way more sexy than that the stupid fridge, and microwave, and toasters, and coffee pots hating me. I might need to run with that. I’ll give you credit.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Appliances Hate MeMy ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 11:47 pmReplyCancel

  • Julie Chenell DeNeen - Haha!! Okay, your finger picture? It looks like poo is coming out of it :) July 2, 2014 – 5:10 pmReplyCancel

  • don - Hahaha, your appliances hate you! Maybe if you gave them a gratuitous boob shot from time to time, they’d be more fond of you? Let me know if it works, I may try it on my kids. They also like to not do what they should be doing around the house.

    Happy birthday to the T man!! 5!! That’s a big boy age…so sad.
    don recently posted…A slow work day and stuff…My ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 5:27 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Damnit, it’s so your asshole fault tonight when I go upstairs and flash my dick of a fridge, microwave, and coffeepot with a boob shot.
      And yeah, so so sad about the big boy age. I might have to try to get knocked up again or whatever.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Appliances Hate MeMy ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 11:48 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - Sometimes I think I just must have broken anything, or else we just buy a lot of cheap crap.
    A little of column A.. a little of column B..
    Tamara recently posted…Not Even Close To Wordless Wednesday: Ten Years & Ice Cream.My ProfileJuly 2, 2014 – 5:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Drun Kenman - If it makes you feel any better, I know someone who placed her hand on a burner to see if it was on. It was…July 2, 2014 – 6:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Totally not your fault and will say that I’m no mechanic either here. Happy almost 5th Birthday to Tucker and Emma is right behind turning 5 on the 17th now!!! :) July 2, 2014 – 7:31 pmReplyCancel

  • Natalie D - OH MY GOSH, my appliances hate me too! Well, at least, the coffee maker does. It gets grinds all over the place every day. And the dishwasher spontaneously breaks every so often.
    Laughed so hard during this post! Glad you resurrected it. :) July 2, 2014 – 11:18 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Stupidfuckingcoffeemakers. Our dishwasher has been surprisingly non-assholish. Which means it will break within the next 30 days, probably.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Appliances Hate MeMy ProfileJuly 3, 2014 – 12:49 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - So sorry that this all happened to you but SO FUNNY with your commentary and the photos of the appliances hating you.
    Happy birthday to Tucker!July 2, 2014 – 11:36 pmReplyCancel

  • Nicki Gilbert - I have little screws on all the windowsills in my house, not just the kitchen lol! Keeping them for the same reason ;). More awesomeness from you, Kristi! Loved this. And happy 5th birthday to Tucker! xxJuly 3, 2014 – 12:48 amReplyCancel

  • Lana - So glad you reposted this since I missed it the first time. My appliances hate me too! We keep babying along our heating system, but I fear a replacement is looming this winter :( The only appliance that cooperates in my house is our toaster – we got it for our wedding 24 years ago and it still works! Except now I probably jinxed myself – better go toast a bagel to make sure. Have a great weekend!July 3, 2014 – 1:54 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Ugh, Lana, so sorry to hear that your appliances hate you as well. Such a sucky thing and please tell me that your comment here didn’t jinx your toaster?
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Appliances Hate MeMy ProfileJuly 3, 2014 – 10:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Kelly McKenzie - My upstairs toilet hates me. It runs. Constantly. Despite the fact that I had lovely Tom the plumber I absolutely cannot do without replace multiple parts and assure me it wouldn’t run anymore. Care to come over and flush?July 4, 2014 – 2:04 amReplyCancel

  • Callie Feyen - Kristi, you are too funny! This stuff happens to me too, and I SWEAR it’s not my fault! Except it probably is. :)

    Hope you’re having a great vacation and a wonderful time celebrating Tucker’s bday!
    Callie Feyen recently posted…Summer Smells LikeMy ProfileJuly 4, 2014 – 6:03 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks so much, Callie!! We’re having fun. This morning kinda sucked (we’re in Ocean City, NJ and it was freezing raining and windy) but tonight was AWESOME at the Boardwalk at some amusement park thing that Tucker LOVED. Plus, beach tomorrow, and fireworks tomorrow night, I hear. So it’s now a birthweek and celebrations daily ;)
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…My Appliances Hate MeMy ProfileJuly 4, 2014 – 10:25 pmReplyCancel

  • Denise Farley - Now if the tv starts to go on the fritz….July 5, 2014 – 12:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life - Our appliances hate us too. The burners on the stove stopped working…when we got down to 2 burners, we finally had it fixed. Then it was the dishwasher, which we had to replace. The oven doesn’t close all the way…we are using a rubberband right now to secure it…and the washing machine broke a while back too. We have an ancient one in the basement, but it’s now on it’s last legs. Oh, and the heat also broke this winter…but we had to fix that. It seems like it is always something! The garage door also broke last year. Maybe our house hates us. LOL
    Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life recently posted…6 Simply Wonderful Starters and #FoodieFridays no.3My ProfileJuly 6, 2014 – 5:08 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHAH to your house hating you – that sucks about your garage door and stove. Here’s to rubberbands and duct tape. Thanks for the funny (and too relatable) comment Michelle!!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 20, 2014 – 7:07 pmReplyCancel

      • Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life - The old washing machine in the basement finally kicked the bucket, and guess what I got?! A scratch and dent LG that is huge! I washed all of our comforters. We had a mound of laundry that literally looked like a foothill in our basement (apparently we have too many clothes because it was like that for months, I could not catch up) and I got it all done in one weekend with that huge washing machine. I am in love!
        Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life recently posted…What’s For Dinner, at #FoodieFridays no. 5My ProfileJuly 20, 2014 – 7:47 pmReplyCancel

  • Sylvia - My husband leaves coffee poo all over the house for me to find!
    Sylvia recently posted…Our Good Behavior Reprieve is InterruptedMy ProfileJuly 7, 2014 – 7:22 pmReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - I am SOOOO GLAD you re-posted this!! Oh you are HILARIOUS!!! I love your pics so much, they just make me DIE with laughter!! Geesh, my friend- you are really screwed on the coffee makers. What is UP with THAT?!!!
    Chris Carter recently posted…There Isn’t Enough of MeMy ProfileJuly 8, 2014 – 12:12 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Chris, I had to repost it when our HVAC unit that is only FIVE YEARS old had to be fully replaced for too much money! So glad you liked it and yeah, no clue on the coffee makers!!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…How I Get Inspired to WriteMy ProfileJuly 20, 2014 – 7:08 pmReplyCancel

  • Caroline - Oh gosh, they really do hate you! It makes for good blog content though :) July 8, 2014 – 10:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Elizabeth - Love this! It reminds me of when I was a kid and my father traveled all the time. Invariably, as soon as he left on a 3 week trip somewhere else on the planet, some major appliance would break and my mom had to deal with it!

    Your drawings are priceless! Love them!
    Elizabeth recently posted…SENSORY TOOLS ON PINTEREST THIS WEEKMy ProfileJuly 13, 2014 – 12:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Tinseltown Mom - Kristi, ha ha. I really thought you were a mechanic. What a hilarious post, and the photos are even better. Nicely done. I feel the same way about a few of my appliances as well!July 20, 2014 – 8:58 pmReplyCancel

Today’s Our Land post was authored by the wonderful and amazing Lizzy from The Muddle Headed Mama. Lizzy has lived and traveled all over the world and hopes to be a gypsy in her next life. She writes about her experiences as a (newly) single mom, muddle-headed moments, Italian lessons, and her lovely life views. […]

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  • Deb @ Urban Moo Cow - Loved this, reminded me of my own piece here. I also felt a sinking sadness as opposed to an outrage. Just… really? Another one? But another one will always pop up, right? Until we address the core issue. And yes, you are stunning in that bikini photo. :)
    Deb @ Urban Moo Cow recently posted…Generation Grit: Better Toys for BoysMy ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 12:00 amReplyCancel

  • Mike - Terrific post, Lizzi! This part caught my attention, “If I were a teenager now, would I be one of those girls sending in their bikini bridge selfie to Instagram or to Facebook?” First off, the pressure on young ladies to keep up with their peers today is enormous. And so dang unneccessary…that’s the infuriating part. A lot of is self-perpetuating amongst themselves and magnified by the media and entertainment factor. Some of things they are doing these days (too much unbeknownst by their parents) is scary. 10 years ago many predicted an evolution back to the 50′s in morality and behavior and not sure what they were thinking. Lordy…I’m just chatting it up tonight. Btw…pregnant women are the most beautiful of all in the world. Their aura lights up and entire street block :)
    Mike recently posted…CANCER-FREE CONTEST! Win $100…My ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 1:33 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Mike, that part got to me, too. Makes me wonder (not wonder very much, because I’d probably be guilty) whether I’d have posted photos like that, too. I agree that pregnant women are the most beautiful in all of the world. The pressure to be ultra-thin from media and peers is horrible. I’m not sure what we can do to fix it. Thanks for your insightful comment, Mike. I appreciate it.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Our Land: What is Beauty?My ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 5:08 pmReplyCancel

  • Lizzi Rogers - Still an amazing piece. Still one I find intensely challenging.June 18, 2014 – 6:12 amReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Love Lizzy and still totally adore her sentiments on this. And that photo of her is still absolutely my favorite, too!!! :)
    Janine Huldie recently posted…Eleanor & Park ~ Recalling Your First LoveMy ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 7:27 amReplyCancel

  • Kerri - Loved this and so glad Lizzi let you share her post here. I think the strongest point is if we were skinny and teenagers would we fall into the bridge trap? Um, probably. Her words are so powerful I hope a teen does read it and rethink that choice
    Kerri recently posted…Actions matterMy ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 9:51 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I think we would have fallen into the bridge trap. I still look at those photos and think they look good. Sigh. Thanks so much, Kerri and I’m glad she let me share her post here, too!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Our Land: What is Beauty?My ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 5:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Echo - This is a great article. The things that are pushed on girls now a days as beautiful, still astounds me.
    Echo recently posted…Almost Wordless Wednesday: MudMy ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 10:44 amReplyCancel

  • Tracie - This is beautiful. I am going to share it with my tween daughter. Because these are the kinds of lessons I want to teach her early – hopefully before the words of the world get a chance to tear her down and skew her vision of what real beauty is.
    Tracie recently posted…Social Media Makes Me Stronger (And Less Depressed)My ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 12:01 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’d love to hear about your tween daughter’s thoughts on it, Tracie. It’s so hard to shape our kids to know the value of exercise and health but also that it’s not about being skinny. Sigh.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Our Land: What is Beauty?My ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 5:16 pmReplyCancel

  • Elizabeth - Great post! Maybe all adolescents just need to go through that questioning and questing to become comfortable with body changes over which they have no control. It might just be inevitable and we, as a society, need to demonstrate that maturity and adulthood means truly outgrowing and moving past that “body focus” stage. You have done an amazing job laying the foundation for what that could look like!June 18, 2014 – 12:19 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I think she did an amazing job too, Elizabeth, and I wish that everybody could be more comfortable with their bodies. It’s so hard for teens to see the bigger picture at times – at least, it was for me…
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Our Land: What is Beauty?My ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 5:35 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Glad you had pictures. I was clueless. I am so glad I am not a teenager anymore. It was hard enough trying to go to school with perfect hair. Body image in the 80s wasn’t a thing – at least I don’t think it was. This is great information for all of us. I don’t know when I started being concerned about my waistline. I even gained 15 lbs my freshman year in college and didn’t sweat it. I really try to concentrate on being healthy versus thin but it’s hard. I need that confidence. Oh and music – yes – that makes me feel GOOD.
    Kenya G. Johnson recently posted…Christopherism – Caught on Tape!My ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 1:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi Campbell - I was clueless, too, Kenya and had never heard of the bikini bridge until Lizzy wrote about it. I’m glad I’m no longer a teenager as well but wish I had the waistline now that I did then (and the attitude about it).
    Kristi Campbell recently posted…Our Land: What is Beauty?My ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 5:37 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - Funny because I always had a bikini bridge, although I never really thought about it or called it that other than to think, “My hip bones are weapons.” When I was pregnant, I finally felt beautiful for the first time.
    Tamara recently posted…It’s In The Way That You Use It.My ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 6:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - I understand Lizzy’s sadness, but I have some anger along with that sadness. I’m angry because I have a teenage daughter and I would hate for her to feel less than in any way because of this bizarre bikini bridge phenomena. Although when I just asked her if she knew what it was, she didn’t. I hope she doesn’t google it, but if she does I’m forwarding her the link to this page.
    Dana recently posted…DIY Important Dates Wall ArtMy ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 8:18 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dana – Let’s get MAD. I’m glad that your daughter doesn’t know what the bridge thing is. I hope she never knows. Or, better yet, never cares because that’s not how we should be measuring ourselves.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Our Land: What is Beauty?My ProfileJune 19, 2014 – 9:36 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah @ LeftBrainBuddha - OMG that ad about “real women have bridges” is absolutely HORRIFYING!!! Thank you for this .. I had never heard of bridges. so creepy.
    Sarah @ LeftBrainBuddha recently posted…“Mommy, What ARE We?”: Rethinking ReligionMy ProfileJune 18, 2014 – 9:49 pmReplyCancel

  • Joy Christi - She IS beautiful, even if I hadn’t seen that picture. THIS POST is beautiful. It’s everything, all women should read this, and find their bliss and follow it. The most attractive quality in women for me? Is confidence. You can’t buy that in pill form, or build up your confidence with 5 pound weights, it’s the HARDEST bridge you’ll ever build: The bridge of your SELF, and your worth, and your gifts to the universe. They’re priceless, they are unique to us, and they are so BEAUTIFUL. Great post.June 18, 2014 – 10:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Julie Chenell DeNeen - I just saw one of these on Instagram the other day, and I had no idea what it was. Thank you for sharing this with us. It’s incredibly sad that we still continue to measure ourselves based on what we don’t have, (no fat, no pudgy thighs, no extra skin) rather than what we DO.June 18, 2014 – 11:50 pmReplyCancel

  • linda Atwell - Out One Ear - There is so much to comment on in this piece and body image is something all (or at least most) women struggle with. Part the part I love best is describing yourself as a gypsy. I want to be a gypsy. Of course I want to be comfortable with my body too, but my bliss is when I’m traveling or planning traveling or packing for traveling. I must be a gypsy too. Great piece.
    linda Atwell – Out One Ear recently posted…A Couple With Special Needs: In Sickness And In HealthMy ProfileJune 19, 2014 – 2:00 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Linda, I knew you’d relate to the gypsy part! Where’s your next trip? Do tell so I can live vicariously through you (although we are going to PA for a Thomas the Train day with our BFFs which should be really fun but not, you know, Costa Rica). And yeah, the body image thing is so hard. To teach health and fitness but not that worth comes from pants size is so hard when it’s hard to believe it ourselves.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Our Land: What is Beauty?My ProfileJune 19, 2014 – 10:00 amReplyCancel

      • Linda Atwell - Out One Ear - We are headed to Alaska on a cruise on the 27th of June and then to Whistler the middle of July. I feel very fortunate. BTW, I’ve been absent in the writing arena lately because of Lindsey and Nick (and traveling). Nick has another big surgery tomorrow. But OHSU doctors believe he will recover rather quickly from this one. His weight, spirits and personality are coming back in full force and we love that. But he and Lindsey haven’t even been living in the same house for the past two months. His mother is taking care of him to make sure he gets the proper nutrition and gains the necessary weight. It was touch and go for awhile. I hope we are past that now. Lindsey is missing him and wants him to return home sooner, rather than later–but it still may be several more months before that happens. I loved when I could write about the advice they give and hope I’ll be doing that again soon. Right now, I’m finding it hard to share some of the things we are going through (and to respect Nick’s privacy). I hope he (and I) will feel better about all this and be able to share publicly (at least on a generic level). :-)
        Linda Atwell – Out One Ear recently posted…A Couple With Special Needs: In Sickness And In HealthMy ProfileJune 19, 2014 – 1:06 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Lizzy’s piece and Joy Christi’s comment are both spot on. It is good to know there are others out there who recognize what true beauty is and can stand against the, well, nonsense that the media tries to force into the brains of our young women. Honestly, this makes me worry terribly for my daughter as she grows…but I’m saving this so as we have these talks about beauty and body image and all the things that really matter in life, I will have these great words at hand.June 19, 2014 – 4:27 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Beauty and body image are SO hard. I’d thought I’d conquered my issues as a teen but as I age, find that they’re right here, now, back, in the form of wrinkles and sighs. Such an important message for everybody, I think.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…Our Land: What is Beauty?My ProfileJune 19, 2014 – 11:58 pmReplyCancel

      • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - I hear you. It bothers me that I find myself comparing myself to other moms when I am in a group of them for a kid party, at church, school, whatever. I know I shouldn’t – especially since many of them are in their late 20s or early 30s and I’m in my mid-40s. It’s a whole different world. I sometimes wonder if we aren’t just so programmed to be too body-conscious and so we can’t help ourselves. Doesn’t make it better – it’s still sad.June 21, 2014 – 10:23 amReplyCancel

  • Lizzy - Muddle-Headed Mamma - Thank you so much for featuring this post, Kristi. I feel so honoured. Sorry it’s taken me so long to comment – I haven’t been on the net for the last two days. This is the most controversial post I’ve ever written. I love that it resonates so deeply with so many women, but I also know there are other readers who did not like the post. Perhaps when I was younger I would not have liked it either. I just hope that my own daughter may be able to gain something from it one day and not waste so many years of her life hating her self the way I did. Sending you lots of love. xx
    Lizzy – Muddle-Headed Mamma recently posted…A Cautionary Tale About Pyjamas & The School RunMy ProfileJune 20, 2014 – 1:21 amReplyCancel

  • Marcia @ Menopausal Mother - This is so beautifully written! I had a bikini bridge once….for about a year out of my life. Honestly though, I agree–I think my body was at its finest when I was carrying my children!
    Marcia @ Menopausal Mother recently posted…Fly On The Wall In A Stink HouseMy ProfileJune 20, 2014 – 10:47 pmReplyCancel

  • Yvonne - I read this first time, and it’s still a great post.
    “You are enough.” That’s it, that’s all we need to remember.
    Yvonne recently posted…When Fear and Love CombineMy ProfileJune 21, 2014 – 6:59 amReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - Ahhhh…. yes! What a beautiful piece!! I too feel sadness, overwhelming defeat about the force of such a twisted and misleading guide to beauty that constantly saturates our culture. I too, worry about my ‘chubby daughter’ who is clearly aware of this type of measurement…

    And I will continue to reinforce the truth as best I can onto her fragile and vulnerable heart. God made her beautiful- she is ‘fearfully and wonderfully made’…

    Beauty is truly measured not by weight, but by character. Period.
    Chris Carter recently posted…Words of Encouragement for a 16 Year OldMy ProfileJune 25, 2014 – 10:50 amReplyCancel

Here in the US, it’s Father’s Day this weekend. I won’t be able to tell my dad how much he means to me on Sunday, so, I thought I’d make an attempt to do so, here. Dear Perekums, You’ve always believed in me, Dad. Even when, and especially when, I didn’t believe in myself. I […]

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  • Janine Huldie - Ok, the blow job question had to be classic and I think my dad might have had a coronary if I asked that of him as a kid, but still your dad definitely rocks for that and so much more. And I got to ask, what the hell kind of teacher asks a kid about being adopted. I taught and never once would have I ever imagined asking about something like this or bringing this kind of thing up to one of my own students. That teacher sounded like a horror show to me and good for your dad getting justice. Happy Father’s Day to your Dad now :)
    Janine Huldie recently posted…Dear Dad…My ProfileJune 12, 2014 – 10:08 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHA to your dad having a coronary if you’d have asked him about blow jobs, Janine! And I know. That teacher SUCKED. So mean. Happy Father’s Day to your dad too (and Kevin!) this weekend, my friend.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…A Letter to My Dad for Father’s DayMy ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 5:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - That was beautiful…my favorite line was ” you un-abandoned us.” It sounds as if your dad is far away now, but if or when he reads this, I’m sure he will feel so proud of you for expressing how you feel about him so eloquently. You’re lucky to have a dad like him and he’s equally lucky to have a daughter like you. :)
    Emily recently posted…My Writing Process (This Post Isn’t As Boring As It Sounds…)My ProfileJune 12, 2014 – 10:16 pmReplyCancel

  • Linda Atwell - Sweet! You are both lucky!
    Linda Atwell recently posted…A Couple With Special Needs: In Sickness And In HealthMy ProfileJune 12, 2014 – 10:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Courtney - Kristi, this was so beautifully written. Your dad kicked ass! I love the things you wrote, and the honesty of it all. I agree, I wish we could have had more time to actually talk at BlogU instead of smiles in passing. I look up to you and your resilience.
    Courtney recently posted…What makes a ‘Good Dad’ According to my Grieving ChildrenMy ProfileJune 12, 2014 – 10:25 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you Courtney, and I agree that he kicks ass!! Me too, to BlogU. Sigh. Sad that it’s already over. And wow – thank you. Your resilience is amazing, friend. You are strong and fabulous. I’ll be thinking about you this weekend and sending thoughts of peace to your family.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…A Letter to My Dad for Father’s DayMy ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 5:37 pmReplyCancel

  • Jean - Kristi- what an awesome father you have. My favorite line: You stepped up, and painted hard-to-find optimism with a broom, because you couldn’t find a fucking paintbrush.
    Jean recently posted…The Slow Ride HomeMy ProfileJune 12, 2014 – 10:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie - Oh Momma – I loved this and your dad and I have so many, many questions. Get Ready! Cant wait to talk face to face and hear your story. AND I loved the pictures@!
    Allie recently posted…FTSF: Dear Dad…My ProfileJune 12, 2014 – 11:35 pmReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - A complete package of perfection. What a guy. He must be so, so proud of you.
    Kelly L McKenzie recently posted…When Fatherly Love Takes a Back SeatMy ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 12:14 amReplyCancel

  • Anna Fitfunner - Kristi: what a wonderful portrait of a wonderful guy! Sounds like your Dad has always been there for you. I hope that he reads your blog, because he’ll be really happy to see how his daughter thinks of him!June 13, 2014 – 2:15 amReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - I remember some of the bits of stories in this one. LOL! I love how he stepped up and un-abandoned you and your brothers. I can’t imagine that my dad would have been able to have any of those conversations let alone suggest I get on birth control. That was a secret between me and mom. Love how he has been there for you through so much and the picture with Tucker and the cigar – too cute! I love seeing pictures of grandfathers ;-) They always look so proud.
    Kenya G. Johnson recently posted…Who gives this woman to be married to this man?My ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 7:10 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kenya,
      Honestly, he had to step up a lot when he and my mom were divorced. I think having a daughter was already hard so he just decided to do things like buy tampons and stuff because he had to maybe… and I love the grandfather photos too!!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…A Letter to My Dad for Father’s DayMy ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 5:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Tarana - Thank you, Kristi, for sharing this story about your awesome Dad! My Dad also stood by me all the time, so I could relate to this.
    Tarana recently posted…Seven Life Lessons My Dad Taught MeMy ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 7:33 amReplyCancel

  • Alison - Such a sweet, sweet, beautiful and heartwarming letter, Kristi.
    Alison recently posted…Through The Lens Thursday #24: DeepMy ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 8:31 amReplyCancel

  • Joy @ icansaymama - Wow Kristi, your dad must be an awesome father and man! I love you love letter to him! Happy Father’s Day, Kristi’s dad, and thank you for always being there for her, shaping her into the aweseom person she is today!
    Joy @ icansaymama recently posted…Teething problems: I thought we were done!My ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 8:34 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - Tears. The world needs more dads like that!
    Lisa @ Golden Spoons recently posted…What’s in Your Fridge??? {Tuesday Ten Linkup}My ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 8:44 amReplyCancel

  • karen - what a great dad and a wonderful letter to him. Grabbing yet another tissue..sniffles…your dad seems like a great man…more sniffles…
    karen recently posted…Dear Dad…My ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 10:28 amReplyCancel

  • Natalie D - You are one lucky lady. What an amazing man.
    Natalie D recently posted…The L.A. SceneMy ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 10:51 amReplyCancel

  • Jhanis - Beautiful Kristi! He sounds like an awesome person. So that’s what it’s like to have a dad who have your back. Thanks for the glimpse. :)
    Jhanis recently posted…All I Really Need To Know I Learned from FacebookMy ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 11:00 amReplyCancel

  • Michelle AKA Crumpets and Bollocks - Your dad sounds like one amazing man. They are too few and far between anymore.

    And you learned about a blow job in 3rd grade? When I was that age, I thought that sex meant peeing on each other, like that’s where I was with it. I did have the blow job talk with my sister in the car. She asked me about it when she was 15, and I basically told her how to give a proper one and then told her not to do it because it’s not lady like. Then I wonder why she grew up so messed up. SMH at myself.
    Michelle AKA Crumpets and Bollocks recently posted…Letter to the World’s Greatest DadMy ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 11:16 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHAH to sex meaning peeing on each other and to telling your sister how to give a blow job. Ouch. (still chuckling)
      And yeah, a boy named Brandon told me what it was in 3rd grade. No clue where he learned it!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…A Letter to My Dad for Father’s DayMy ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 6:03 pmReplyCancel

  • Kate (Shakespeare's Mom) - What a truly beautiful post for your dad. It sounds like the two of you make quite a pair :)

    P.S. I can’t believe your teacher!! WTF?
    Kate (Shakespeare’s Mom) recently posted…There are no Spageetoes on the Porch, and Other Reasons my Three-Year-Old has Corrected Me (This Week)My ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 11:48 amReplyCancel

  • Elizabeth - This is so beautiful! I am crying (you brought a lot of us to tears with this one!). What a great father and what great memories. Thank you for sharing them with us.
    Elizabeth recently posted…THIS WEEK’S PINTEREST FINDSMy ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 1:22 pmReplyCancel

  • Claudia Schmidt - Oh wow. Tears pouring down my face. What a lovely, meaningful and proud tribute to a man who sounds like a great dad. Hugs. PS I love that whole blow job thing – my son asked me when he was about 8 and I have to admit, I said “You’re a little young to understand, we’ll talk about it when you’re a little older” and he said, “Good, let’s talk about baseball instead .” :) June 13, 2014 – 1:44 pmReplyCancel

  • Stephanie Smith Sprenger - OK, I’m bawling here. That was amazing, Kristi, really. Your dad is so lucky to have a daughter like you who has such an incredible perspective on a complicated relationship. That was really beautiful. June 13, 2014 – 2:17 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - I remember that blow job story – that alone makes your dad a rock star. But to see You, and your Good – that is what a parent should do. Your dad was obviously a good role model because that is exactly what you are doing with Tucker. I imagine your dad is very proud.
    Dana recently posted…Out of the boxMy ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 4:52 pmReplyCancel

  • Drun Kenman - Amazing. You are lucky to have such an amazing daughter, and it looks like he passed the awesome right to you.June 13, 2014 – 6:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerri - OMG You just trumped the siblings as favorite child for the weekend. This is freaking awesome. Such a wonderful gift to your dad. Better than Superbowl tickets, you show him you are grateful for him. That this Father’s day is about you being a mom because he was a rock star dad. Who totally gets bonus points for not driving off the road.
    Kerri recently posted…Dear DadMy ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 8:11 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kerri,
      Always hope to trump my siblings for affection so wha hooo if this worked a little! And he might disagree about the superbowl tickets but thank you so much! Huge bonus points for not driving off the road. Huge.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…A Letter to My Dad for Father’s DayMy ProfileJune 14, 2014 – 9:27 amReplyCancel

  • Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life - What an awesome letter. Absolutely and positively beyond amazing. I think I would have driven off the road if my 8 year old was asking those questions…holy cow. That was hilarious!
    Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life recently posted…Women Entrepreneurs: Are You Ready to Launch a New Business?My ProfileJune 13, 2014 – 8:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia @ Menopausal Mother - Awwww Kristi, your father sounds AMAZING! I can feel the love in your words. You two are so lucky to have each other!!!June 13, 2014 – 10:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Christopher Blair Maywhort - Gotta say, your dad was an intimidating guy back in those early years. One time, on our way back from a Boy Scout camping weekend, your dad was driving us back from the mountains. Me, Tom, and one or two other guys from our troop. I don’t remember who it was, but one of the other guys was eating an orange as we drove down the mountain road. Every 200 yards or so, he would peel off a piece of the orange peeling and throw it out the backseat car window. Well, your dad got a glimpse of this and slammed on the brakes. He turned the car around and, literally, made the boy get out and pick up every single piece of the orange peel he had dropped out the window. Luckily, I didn’t know the meaning of biodegradable back then or I probably would have had to jog back home. And what’s with your 3rd grade early-bloomer blow job inquisition? There were girls in my junior year of high school who still didn’t know what 69 was! Even my ‘Where Did I Come From?’ book didn’t go into that much detail! I had Miss Haney in elementary school too. She told me I’d be rich by the time I was 40. Bitch lied to us both. Lastly, it pisses me off that your dad isn’t aging after all these years. Guess hair does wonders for one’s appearance. Good blog missy. June 14, 2014 – 1:23 amReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - Crap. This was freaking amazing and so I am crying… because it was THAT amazing. Oh how I love your dad. I love him sooo bad. Why? Because he believed in you. He spoke in your defense. He showed up over and over again for you. He gave you hope and love and faith in yourself. Oh my gosh how I love him. These stories?

    Powerful testimony to the power of a dad.

    Still crying.

    I love your dad.

    So much.


    I really really love you.
    Chris Carter recently posted…For You, DadMy ProfileJune 14, 2014 – 1:25 amReplyCancel

  • Tamara - I love him and I don’t even know him!
    The blowjob story is a favorite.
    The Star Wars story is making me cry right now. That’s the kind of parent I want to be.
    Tamara recently posted…A Lovely Little Flashback Friday.My ProfileJune 14, 2014 – 7:46 amReplyCancel

  • Jamie Miles - What a wonderful real relationship you have. It’s fine line to walk — balancing between being a parent and guiding children and being understanding and letting us fall and make mistakes. And always being there with unconditional love and an affirming nod that things will work out. I confess to falling short of that standard some days. Sounds like your father is a loving compassionate man — who did the best that he could. I hope my children feel that way about me some day. I’m not so sure.
    Jamie Miles recently posted…Dear Dad. I’ve been a baby about you getting old and dying on me.My ProfileJune 14, 2014 – 9:08 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Jamie,
      I think we all fall short of that standard some days and are just doing the best we can. I’m sure that your children will feel that way about you because you’re awesome. And I think they know (I hope so anyway) that we’re winging this parenting game most of the time. I hope you have an amazing weekend!
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…A Letter to My Dad for Father’s DayMy ProfileJune 14, 2014 – 9:38 amReplyCancel

  • WTF words thoughts feelings - What a gift to your dad! I’m sure no tangible gift could ever beat this one. Despite the hardships, you were given an amazing gift to make up for it all…your dad. Beautiful. Now how do you suppose YOU would handle the BJ question from your child?? lolJune 14, 2014 – 11:25 amReplyCancel

  • Mike - This has me bawling crying! I lost my Dad several years ago to Parkinson’s. This will be the first Father’s Day that I won’t have my step father, John, either (cancer).

    You said it…and channeling your blog to both of my Dad’s above…

    “…for forgiving me every single time I fucked up.”

    I turned in all of those fuck ups into a huge success. I love you and miss you more than you can possibly know.

    Happy Father’s Day to your Dad, Kristi! :)
    Mike recently posted…I’m Phoenix, A Golden Retriever: A Lionheart Against CancerMy ProfileJune 14, 2014 – 6:48 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw Mike. I’m so so sorry for the loss of your dad and step father. That’s so unbelievably hard and here’s to our dads forgiving us for our fuckups. Happy Father’s Day to you, my fabulous friend. I hope you and PDawg had some amazing time in the sun today.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…A Letter to My Dad for Father’s DayMy ProfileJune 15, 2014 – 7:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Ruchira Khanna - This was such a lovely letter to your dad, Kristy.

    I have always admired you in many ways…your resilience to withstand anything. This FTSF is another attraction for me to swing by your posts :)

    TGIF!June 14, 2014 – 7:39 pmReplyCancel

  • Katia - Hard to write something eloquent after reading this. “You have “unabandoned us”. Wow. So moving. Beautiful beautiful tribute, Kristi. What a man and he should be so proud of his daughter.June 14, 2014 – 8:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Christina Morley - I can see by the photos that he was and is a very proud dad. What kind of teacher doesn’t think an adopted child can succeed? That kind of teacher shouldn’t be working with kids! I’m glad your dad was always there for you. Enjoy today with your dad!
    Christina Morley recently posted…To My Three Dads with LinkyMy ProfileJune 15, 2014 – 12:32 amReplyCancel

  • Brittnei - Oh! This is a tear jerker. How awesome is it that your Dad was there for you through all of this! He seems like he truly tried to be the best Dad ever and succeeded at it in your life. I’m so sorry that he’s no longer here for you to be able to tell him how much he means to you.
    Brittnei recently posted…Creative Style Linkup- Week 2My ProfileJune 15, 2014 – 9:57 amReplyCancel

  • Gary Sidley - A magnificent tribute to your father; he should be proud to have you as his daughter and, based on your description of him over the years, I’m sure he is.
    Gary Sidley recently posted…Procrastination? You’ll go blind!My ProfileJune 15, 2014 – 10:52 amReplyCancel

  • Brian Sorrell - What a heartfelt and perfect set of memories to celebrate a Dad! You had me laughing and awwwww-ing the whole time. Nicely done.
    Brian Sorrell recently posted…RedemptionMy ProfileJune 15, 2014 – 5:22 pmReplyCancel

  • Lana - Such a beautiful tribute to your dad. One of the best I’ve read. Have a great day!
    Lana recently posted…Grilled Chocolate and Orange Marmalade SmoresMy ProfileJune 15, 2014 – 7:01 pmReplyCancel

  • zoe - Yknow I read this earlier and I think I never got back to comment … stupid android freezes up… anyhow… if I did or didnt… I will ask again as I thought I asked before but probably only did in my head…Do you think you could get your dad to adopt me? You know me… raised by wolves…
    I love this relationship story and now knowing you better, am not surprised in the least by how lovely and real it is!
    zoe recently posted…TToT Sunday EditionMy ProfileJune 16, 2014 – 1:54 amReplyCancel

  • Seana Turner - Sounds like your Dad blessed you in an amazing way. Can’t believe that school teacher making you feel like a freak for being adopted – really? Reminds me that we all need at someone who loves us unconditionally and is always there for us.
    Seana Turner recently posted…A Fun Clutter QuizMy ProfileJune 16, 2014 – 7:59 amReplyCancel

  • Kristi - “Un-abandoned” was my favorite part. It sounds like your dad undid harm more than once. Good for him for taking up the adoption inquisition issue with your teacher. Sometimes classroom projects are insensitive to adoptees (especially older adoptees), i.e., “Bring in a baby photo,” but to have a teacher grill a student on adoption status (and imply that adoptees are less-than), crosses the line from insensitive to downright mean.
    Kristi recently posted…Monday Morning in the Kitchen: Grilled Eggplant Stack with Summer SquashMy ProfileJune 16, 2014 – 12:12 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks so much, Kristi! He definitely undid harm (and what a great way to phrase it). That teacher sucked. I hadn’t thought about the “bring in a baby photo” one – thanks for the reminder of that, too, and for your sweet comment.
      Kristi Campbell recently posted…A Letter to My Dad for Father’s DayMy ProfileJune 16, 2014 – 8:02 pmReplyCancel

  • K - AMAZING, Kristi. I feel so ridiculous because after I read your posts, I often find myself completely lost for words. Your dad sounds like an incredible person, and you are so blessed to have each other! Hope you and your family had an awesome Father’s Day!
    K recently posted…In which I eat six pints of ice cream, do math for fun, and reunite with an inanimate objectMy ProfileJune 16, 2014 – 1:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Joy Christi - That is amazing. I can’t even be made you made me cry again :’)
    Thank the universe that your dad had the strength to step up and be BOTH. And be fun. Amazing.June 16, 2014 – 5:15 pmReplyCancel

  • Lizzi Rogers - Everything he is, and was and will be – to everything you are and were and will be. You are wonderful. And an absolute credit to him. I hope he loved this.June 16, 2014 – 7:04 pmReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - Your dad sounds like an incredible man. It explains a lot about the woman you are today and that’s a good thing, my friend. Take it as the compliment it is ;) That said, let the record show I will never be able to forget the blow job portion of this post..not ever!June 17, 2014 – 9:25 amReplyCancel

  • Diane Tolley - Wonderful man! And wonderful you to recognize it!June 17, 2014 – 7:08 pmReplyCancel

  • Stephanie - Kristi – this was an amazing post. Oh my goodness, I didn’t want it to end. It makes me think how lucky and blessed you are to have a dad you love so much and who obviously loves you too.

    Also, how did you hear about blow jobs at 8????? I think I was in 9th grade. That is funny and he must have been both shocked that you asked and proud that you were comfortable enough to. Funny stuff for sure.June 17, 2014 – 10:49 pmReplyCancel

  • Ginny Marie - This letter to your dad is amazing. And if my daughter, who is in 3rd grade, mentioned blowjobs to me, I would definitely have driven off the road!
    Ginny Marie recently posted…Ten Things I Love About My DadMy ProfileJune 19, 2014 – 10:00 amReplyCancel

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