Finding Ninee » Sharing our parenting and special needs stories with heart and humor.

Sometimes, we have so much to say that there’s nothing to say. Actually, strike that. Sometimes, we have so much to say that finding the tip of the tangled ball of thoughts that sits on our shoulders and whispers into our ears while trying to tame and untangle a stretch of it to resemble anything that […]

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  • Emily - This post actually made me miss the days when my kids used to wake me in the middle of the night, and I must say I didn’t love having my sleep interrupted so this post must be THAT good. 🙂 And, I’m glad you got away with a nap!December 1, 2016 – 10:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Wow thanks, Emily! I don’t like my sleep interrupted either but I’m all sentimental these days knowing that I only have a short time when he wants me (and believes in Santa) after having bad dreams!!! xooDecember 2, 2016 – 11:44 pmReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - Please, when times are rough, remember: Because you always come when I need you for bad dreams …” That’s everything.December 1, 2016 – 10:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - Please, when times are rough, remember: Because you always come when I need you for bad dreams …” That’s everything.December 1, 2016 – 10:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - You won’t always be so quiet and silent. I know that is true Kristi. You don’t quite know what to say these days and neither do I really. I am trying to organize my thoughts, but they are somewhat scattered lately.
    Aw, bad dreams are the worst, for children and at any age really, but having you to go to and to comfort, as you were comforted by him, that makes all the difference. That’s really what will stay with you both always.
    Off to sort out my own ball of tangled nonsense now and I hope to return to FTSF next time. Glad I read this though.December 3, 2016 – 2:49 amReplyCancel

“Who’s your favorite character from Minecraft?” he says. “Ummm, maybe Hero Brian?” I say. “It’s not Hero Brian, it’s Herobrine and he’s evil, so he shouldn’t be your favorite,” my son replies with his longish-hair, scraggly, some missing, some half-growing-in-teeth-toothless-grin… He goes on and on about each character, explains having to “mine” cows for leather […]

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  • Kelly L McKenzie - You covered a lot of ground in this post, Kristi. It brought back so many memories for me. Like watching my friend enthusiastically play a Pokemon card game with her son even though she was exhausted and beyond bored, visiting my friend who was dying of pancreatic cancer yet refusing to talk about her impending death, and listening to my son’s barking cough in the night. Life is messy and complicated and SO worth experiencing. Thank you for these reminders. I just read a brilliant post in the New Yorker about Obama’s reaction to the election and came away with a sense of hope. Yes, even we Canadians are affected by the news. Hang in there, Kiddo, hang in there.November 17, 2016 – 10:18 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OOH Kelly, I’ll have to find Obama’s reaction post in the New Yorker – I could use a sense of hope for sure. And yeah, I know you Canadians are affected by it as well. Sigh. The whole world is really.November 18, 2016 – 9:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Something much deeper is happening and I feel sad too. Can’t shake it. Maybe I shouldn’t be isolating myself for social media (people). I don’t know. Sorry to hear about your co-worker. She makes a good point about pretty much “keeping in touch”. I need to do more of that. I have been doing alot of what Tucker said, breathing in and out through my mouth. My nose isn’t stuff but I guess you get a bigger inhale and exhale out of your mouth.

    Aren’t mommy ears something? Oh and Minecraft. I really tried to like it. But I gave up when my bricks wouldn’t stack one on top of each other to build a simple wall. Thankfully he moved on. He’s very into Cars and his games are driving games and customizing the car. I hate to drive to in a video game, it’s so reckless and I can’t stay on the road but it is better and Minecraft. 😉

    LOL to Hero Brain.November 18, 2016 – 8:51 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - It is so much deeper and I’m fairly certain it’s not good deeper although who knows. I know in history when things are bad that people getting sad and angry is what changes things so maybe this is the beginning to a world with less racism and bigotry and rape culture finally being talked about more? I don’t know either.
      And yeah, Mommy ears are amazing. So weird what we hear. I haven’t really played Minecraft but I’ve watched Tucker play it a lot. I like it in the sense that he learned how to read the word “inventory” because of it and it makes him use his imagination.
      Driving games are HARD!November 18, 2016 – 9:37 pmReplyCancel

  • Debi Lewis - I love so much about this post — the image of the 7 year old messy hair and missing teeth is one I can picture about both my girls at that age. I used to call 7 and 8 “the jack-o-lantern years.” I remember that age so fondly.

    And I also appreciate so much of what you say here regarding the Minecraft chatter being more tolerable because you thought he might never speak. I feel that way about my 11 year old’s requests for snacks before dinner. She went years without ever telling me she was hungry — food hurt, felt bad going down, was lots of work for her. Now that she had surgery to correct the problems that caused all that, she eats like a normal kid. It is inconvenient and totally wonderful.

    What a gorgeous post — thank you!November 18, 2016 – 9:31 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks for reminding me that I’m not alone with the whole snaggle-tooth “jack-o-lantern years” (love that) love of this age. I am pretty sure Tucker gets annoyed with me with how often I ask him to smile and SHOW HIS TEETH because SO CUTE. Gah.
      What a wonderful thing that your daughter now wants snacks and that it’s inconvenient and wonderful. Here’s to these amazing (and occasionally annoying) kids of ours!November 18, 2016 – 9:49 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - We here in Canada are with you, although sad, but breathing in and out like you say.November 18, 2016 – 1:21 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I just read yours and LOVE that we both talked about breathing in and out! So similar and yet so different – loved yours and appreciate your sweet comment and linking up!November 18, 2016 – 9:50 pmReplyCancel

  • Echo - Sometimes, I wonder how much I will miss the repetitive things that I roll my eyes at now. I will always cherish certain sounds though, like the way they say they love me. Especially when I need it the most.November 18, 2016 – 8:55 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I wonder too… here’s to hearing that they love us. That’s pretty much everything.November 18, 2016 – 11:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia @Menopausalmom - Another beautifully written post, my friend. I’m still trying to come to terms with the election results. But right now, it all seems so insignificant after hearing about your friend with cancer. So very sad……but her attitude is amazing.November 18, 2016 – 9:35 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thanks Marcia. You’re so kind. And yeah… dying makes everything different I think…November 18, 2016 – 11:15 pmReplyCancel

  • Scott - I think I messed it up. I tried breathing over and over, but now I have the hiccups.November 18, 2016 – 9:56 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - It’s amazing how kids are so expressive/profound and they don’t even realize it. Yes, we all do need to keep breathing in and out and maybe the world can become more joined together…November 19, 2016 – 9:20 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - They really are. I love it… and yeah, I’ve thought about the whole breathing in and out thing a LOT since I’ve seen further stuff happening that’s super hard to not feel hopeless over…November 20, 2016 – 10:19 pmReplyCancel

  • My Inner Chick - Hello, Sweets.

    thank you for reminding us to “BREATHE.”
    Sometimes, I forget!

    xxNovember 21, 2016 – 7:57 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hey you. Happy Thanksgiving and here’s to remembering to BREATHE. I forget, too…November 23, 2016 – 10:22 pmReplyCancel

  • Josie Two Shoes - This was a beautiful writing that really tugged at my heart. Oh yes, how precious are those words he speaks, and years from now you will wish he was still sitting behind you telling you all about Minecraft. As I rode behind my son, now the driver, when we met up with him and his girlfriend in Dallas this past weekend, he reached back his hand to connect with mine, and I remembered how I used to pick him up from daycare in the days before child carseats, and he would rub his head against mine, happy to be together and heading home. It is a scary world now, the undertones are heartbreaking and disturbing, by your son has it right, just keep breathing… things have a way of working out. Many good people will come together to see that all is not lost.November 25, 2016 – 4:05 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw that’s so sweet that your son reached back to take your hand and that it brought back memories of rubbing heads with him when he was little. <3 You're right, too, things do have a way of working out.November 25, 2016 – 8:41 pmReplyCancel

On Tuesday, I walked into a local school, showed my ID and got a ballot, voted, put it in the scanner, and stuck an “I Voted” sticker to my shirt. I wore it all day. I lingered outside and called my husband. I wanted to tell him that the lines were good right now (he’d […]

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  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Yup, I’m right with you on all of this.
    As easy as it might be to do so, I don’t think we can just lump all of his supporters into one group of homogeneous haters. I know people who chose him; they are good people who truly are operating in what they believe is in the interest of themselves and their families – as are we all. I know it sounds kind of Pollyanna to say that, but what are we if we can’t be compassionate and at least try to understand? Do I think some of those people are true haters )of whichever group you want to insert here)? Yes, absolutely. But if I’m being honest, then I have to accept that people who supported Clinton probably are haters of some group as well.
    This is all going to be part of a tough road. I sent Zilla to school with the same directive – don’t discuss it and don’t let anyone get in your face about it. Now I suppose it’s my job to teach her how to take all of this upset and anger and channel it into something positive.
    Love you! Great choice this week.November 10, 2016 – 11:11 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks Lisa and love you too! And yeah, I know some really good, smart people who voted for Trump as well and I know that they, like you said, voted for what they believe will be best for them and for their families, just like we did.November 12, 2016 – 7:39 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - I’m grieving too. For the country I hoped we were, for the future I thought we had. But like you, I believe that we will keep making the world better. It’s just going to be harder than it should be.November 10, 2016 – 11:55 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Here’s to keeping on trying to do what we can to make the world better. XOXONovember 12, 2016 – 7:40 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - I like how you’ve articulated your grief, because you are also trying to understand the Trump supporters (rather than lash out) and how/why they voted for him. As I said in Janine’s post, this election was so not normal and all we can do now is support our new President and hope and PRAY that he can lead this country in a healthy and positive direction.November 11, 2016 – 9:03 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - This election was cray cray completely right? Sigh. And thank you! Certainly he won’t be allowed to say some of what he’s said once he’s in office, right? Right?November 12, 2016 – 7:41 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - This change is definitely unexpected. I don’t want to hate the sitiuation or the man because that is too big of a burden to carry. I’m dissappointed and that burden is big enough. I’m still a little emotionally checked out…November 11, 2016 – 9:36 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You’re right about hating being too big of a burden to carry and I thank you for that reminder. I’m still a bit checked out too.November 12, 2016 – 7:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Rabia @ The Liebers - We’ve been dealt this hand. The question now is “what do we do next?” And my choice is to continue to teach my children that our differences make us better, that all people have value, and that love wins. I am choosing to engage with positive people who want to make good things happen and making sure that my disenfranchised friends know that I support them.November 11, 2016 – 11:43 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - That sounds like a great idea Rabia – focusing on our disenfranchised friends and continuing to teach that love wins – especially to our children!November 12, 2016 – 7:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @TheGoldenSpoons - This election has been stressful and hurtful to so many on both sides of it and, whether it made them happy or sad, everyone was surprised by the final outcome. Thank you for sharing your feelings about it. I hope and pray that we can move forward with positivity and grace and get back to being the UNITED States of America somehow. XOXONovember 11, 2016 – 4:48 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Lisa, and I agree that the focus should be on getting back to being the UNITED states once again. We’re probably closer to that than we realize.November 12, 2016 – 7:46 pmReplyCancel

  • marcia @Menopausalmom - Grieving right there with you. I am still in shock and have shed my share of tears. I’m trying to be accepting of the election results, but in all honestly, I am terrified of what comes next…..November 12, 2016 – 12:24 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m afraid of what comes next too Marcia. Here’s hoping that EVERYBODY remembers love wins <3November 12, 2016 – 7:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - Oh Kristi. I know you would fight fiercely for your son’s rights and happiness, as a mother with a child who deals with a disability, no matter what. I am up here in Canada, but I worry for the direction the world is headed, not just the US. This just wasn’t a big shock to me. I hoped she would win but I knew this could happen, but the days since have left me feeling uncomfortable in my skin. So many want to have the man running things who spoke so blatantly awfully toward women. I feel unheard as a woman, all concerns about the language used and the intentions behind it. Are women so worthless to things, even and especially the way so many women looked the other way at his words and voted for him anyway? can never unheard that. I think this has been one giant con, but it is not my country. I can only look from my place in the country right above. I am scared and everyone talking of getting behind him sounds all wonderful, except it seems to be tearing the country apart as the slippery slope becomes slicker and slicker. It is a run away train of risk and danger and I study history and I have seen this ignoring of the past which can repeat itself. I feel like I see more clearly than many who have working eyes. It is a lonely place to be, even when I know I am not really alone. I feel like I am shouting fire in a crowded theater and my voice fails me. I am sorry for your tears and because you so hoped to see a first female president. That is a loss, but this is a bigger issue than winners and losers. The whole world will lose in the end. Sorry for the doom. What a week. I feel like I’m dreaming some ridiculous dream, but I still try to listen to the people and their reasons, for why things are how they are. I don’t know how any parent or teacher educates or preaches against bullying now. I can’t argue with anyone because it is exhausting, but I do appreciate these times when we write our realities and share our fears. I feel like I can’t fully express mine.November 12, 2016 – 9:03 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I guess you saw the signs better than I did, Kerry, because honestly, it was a shock to me although I feel silly saying that now. I feel unheard as a woman as well, but I also know some smart women who voted for him and they have their reasons – Obamacare being a big one for them…
      Please don’t feel the need to apologize for the doom – it’s crazy and scary and sad. I think you expressed your reality really well but know that we all have so much more to say and some of it needs to be kept in private circles in person or something (as in not on our websites). Hugs, friend.November 14, 2016 – 11:51 pmReplyCancel

  • My Inner Chick - —I always LOVE clicking over here.

    I’m so sick of the HATE out there.

    When people say Horrid, Mean, Degrading things
    about Trump Supporters, they are talking about half
    of my family. They are NOT racists. And I love them ( even though they were wrong! )

    I’m a Nasty Woman, but I still respect, dare I say, the people who did not vote for her. ( Except if they are spreading hate )

    *** And still, I breathe. ***

    love! xNovember 12, 2016 – 3:12 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - GAW I love YOU. And yeah, I’m sick of the hate out there too…. And still, we breathe. There’s no way that they all support hate. I know that with all of me. I also know that he does and that just plain is awful. xxooNovember 14, 2016 – 11:52 pmReplyCancel

When I was in my early 20’s and mostly invincible, we stood stooped, half-in and half-out of a plane with a max occupancy of four people including the pilot. It was louder than I thought it would be. I wondered how many people changed their minds once the door was open. “I wanna go skydiving!” […]

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  • Dana - 200,000 babies born today? Wow. The magnitude of this world is incomprehensible to me.

    I completely understand the fear of death once you’re a mom. I was watching “This is Us” the other night (if you’re not watching, you should), and a character was talking about her husband dying when her son was 15. My son is 15. I don’t want my kids to have to bear a loss like that.

    But scuba diving? That would be cool.November 3, 2016 – 10:16 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Isn’t it weird to think about? It’s incomprehensible to me too and yeah the whole fear of death thing… and I have NOT seen This is Us and need a new show so thank you! Gulp though to 15. Scuba diving is amazing. You so should go really.November 4, 2016 – 9:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Twindaddy - I get this. The thought of leaving my children is unbearable.November 4, 2016 – 7:15 amReplyCancel

  • Emily - Wow – skydiving! I am way too wimpy for that now or even when I was younger I never would have tried it. However, I believe that certain people seek out to try those types of adventures and I think it’s awesome…I’m totally envious. I also think it’s great you “got it out of your system” and tried it pre-Tucker so you can reminisce about it and not have any regrets that you didn’t try it…November 4, 2016 – 10:42 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I loved it and would never do it again! Yikes! But if you haven’t been scuba diving, I highly recommend. Truly.November 4, 2016 – 9:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - There’s things I don’t to do either unless I’m experiencing with Christopher. I’d never been scuba diving when we went and I’d never been zip lining when we went. I get nervous when my husband and I are off without Christopher. I don’t want him to be left behind. I don’t want us all to be taken together either. I just want us each to have each other for a long time.

    I’d probably change one of those who changed my mind when the airplane door was open.November 4, 2016 – 1:26 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You should go scuba diving. It’s REALLY peaceful, once you get below the scary surface. It’s like the most calming thing ever. I went zip lining at camp one summer when I was like 10 but haven’t been since. I’m not sure I could do it now because heights but maybe if Tucker wanted to go!
      And LOL to changing your mind when the airplane door was open. I thought about it…November 4, 2016 – 9:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - I can’t believe you jumped out of a plane! I love the part about not being stupid stupid. 😀
    I’m right with you on this. Things I used to do and ways I used to think seemed to change instantly after Zilla. Some days I feel like every decision I make is about not dying because she needs me. It’s probably a little over-cautious, but is it? I worry when we leave her somewhere and go out alone. I worry that something will happen on the way to pick her up at school and she’ll be left with that memory of me not showing up. I worry about being unhealthy and dying too soon because hey, she’s only 8 and I’m 46 so I need to keep this body ticking for a long time. it’s exhausting.November 4, 2016 – 4:36 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Lisa, I know – I can’t believe it either. I went again like another seven times too. Gulp. hahah to not being stupid stupid. I’m overly cautions too but the thing is, their lives WILL be better with us in them. Fact. So not over-cautious I think. And yeah, it’s exhausting. If it helps, I’m older than you and Tucker’s younger than she is… so you know, the odds thing…November 4, 2016 – 9:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Deirdre - Wow! Exciting life you led! Kids change everything don’t they!November 5, 2016 – 4:47 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - They really really do Deirdre. Talk about perspective on the value of life!November 7, 2016 – 1:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Allison - I fear death too- never more so now, as I get older, and realize how long I have to live for bear. I figure I have to be ninety, because then his siblings will be in their fifties, and therefor (hopefully) it won’t be too much of a burden to care for him. I hate this topic – in make my heart race. AHHHHH!November 5, 2016 – 2:21 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sorry Allie! I know what you mean though. It’s awful to think about and when you’re 90, be sure that one of your road trips heads my way so we can get a drink and laugh about how worried we were way back when!November 7, 2016 – 1:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Louise - I love how you set this up! I check in on your topics now and again and this one was just too heavy for me – but I adore how you did this.

    I hope to scuba dive with my girls too. I think that would be lovely. I haven’t gone diving in over 10 years but loved it when I did.

    Never have I ever jumped out of a plane (I wouldn’t drink there). Well done to you!November 5, 2016 – 5:43 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Louise! I hope you and your girls will go scuba diving. I miss it – so peaceful you know?November 7, 2016 – 2:01 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - Stupid stupid. Lol. Love that. I am coming up on a pretty momentous year and I have wondered what I could do to celebrate that could be titled stupid but not stupid stupid. After all, I would hate to have gotten along these last twenty years with my father’s donated kidney, just to end the whole thing in a tragic sky diving accident.
    Hmm. He didn’t even want me to go walk up along the outside of the CN Tower in Toronto a few years back, but I felt it was just something I had to do. Sky diving is definitely on that list, but it would cause him great stress and I probably think I should wait a while longer on that. Maybe for 25 or 30 years or for some other occasion. I wonder though if I would have the guts to actually go through with it. I am not overly fond of airplanes, but I don’t know for sure how I feel about jumping from one.
    The plan is for myself and as much of my family as possible to try the new zip line over Niagara Falls on June 5th, 2017. Exciting stuff. I thought about a party, but not sure who would show up, so I intend to take my party on the road, or the line as is more correct in this case.
    As for scuba diving, not sure that is one I will try. Going below the “scary surface” into the peaceful water below sounds lovely here and I’m sure it was, with all the bright fish species, but for me who wouldn’t be able to see much of that, I think it would just end up feeling claustrophobic and I may end up super panicky or worse. I love to hear of other people’s experiences with it though.
    Brave to put this topic out there and I am glad I did not shy away from it. This post is a thought provoking one for sure.November 7, 2016 – 5:03 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kerry – zip lining over Niagara Falls sounds terrifying and thrilling! Oh my gosh – that’s way up there with skydiving! That makes sense about scuba diving. The equipment is heavy and it does feel a little claustrophobic at first. I think what helps is looking up and seeing that the surface is get-to-able and if that were a fuzzy image, I imagine it wouldn’t be nearly as calming.
      Now I’m going to Google zip lining over the falls. YIKES!November 7, 2016 – 2:07 pmReplyCancel

“I’m going to be a better mom than you are!” I hollered as I ran up the stairs to pull out my dresser drawer and write secret thoughts about how my parents were failing on the pressed wood of the drawer that held daytime socks and underpants. I was sure I’d be the perfect parent. […]

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  • Dana - Oh, I’ve missed your writing, Kristi. This is beautiful – your personification of your future, the way you go back and forth between then and now, what you thought would be and what is, and how what is can be even better.

    First best mom – how awesome is that? I’m jealous.October 27, 2016 – 10:14 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dana! Thank you thank you! And yeah, first best mom is pretty amazing. 🙂October 28, 2016 – 8:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Echo - Your words always resonate with me so much. You are one of my greatest writing inspirations and one of my dearest blogging friends. I am also continually finding out that we are more alike than we knew and that we will have SO MUCH to talk about on the day we meet!October 27, 2016 – 10:44 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I can’t WAIT to meet you in person! We need to make it happen. And thank you so so much for your super-kind words. I think you’re amazing right back 🙂October 28, 2016 – 8:16 pmReplyCancel

  • Lydia - Holy cow what an amazing piece of writing!!! This is not only fab for content but sheer style! It holds so many truths! My favorite is always the interactions with Tucker. .he knows you so well and you him…I could sit down and read your conversations with him all day! There is such mutual love and comfort there.October 28, 2016 – 4:13 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You are SO KIND. Thank you!!! And yeah, I love the interactions with Tucker too. He’s such a cool kid and I feel so lucky.October 28, 2016 – 8:17 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - I love how you give more or a previous story I asked to hear more of. Excellent writing! I’m so impressed that I know you wrote this within an hour or two of posting it too. Wow! Love your tin foil robot.October 28, 2016 – 7:15 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’ll have to give you more of the story Kenya! I never want to put TOO much out there, you know? I’m still in touch with his mom (in fact, his mom, aunt, and grandma came to Tucker’s baptism in Denver when he was a baby). The tin foil robot was cool, right?October 28, 2016 – 8:19 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie - The robot costume cracked me up! I’ll text you a picture of the “costume” I sent Bear to school in today. In the future I pray I can be the second best mom in the world, cause you’re the first😉.October 28, 2016 – 10:02 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh yes, send me the picture of what you sent Bear in to school wearing today! 🙂 And you’re the best mom too. We’re both allowed to be.October 28, 2016 – 8:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Jamie - The photo is hysterical. That’s a creative soul. My 15yo announced the other day that she was going to spoil her children. I’m thinking good luck with that if they treat her like she treats us. I guess it’s the teenage thing but makes me constantly think to myself — one day they too will have teenagers. (Very well-written post btw. )October 28, 2016 – 4:39 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you Jamie! I love the photo too – he’s so funny. Also teenagers are terrible, I know. My husband’s daughter used to live with us and OMG the moods and the drama and the attitude! I like the idea that one day they’ll have teenagers too.October 28, 2016 – 8:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia @Menopausalmom - This is so awesome! I used to say the same things to my mom when I was a teenager. I also said a lot of other stupid things, like, “MY child will NEVER behave like that in public…” Ha-Ha! Live and learn, right??!!!October 28, 2016 – 11:41 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - LOL to my child will never behave like that in public. Been there, and even asked to sit next to no kids (DUH) and lessons learned!! HAHA yup. totally.October 29, 2016 – 11:19 pmReplyCancel

  • Scott - The future is too hard to see, let alone think about. I haven’t thought about the future since before Y2K, and even then it was only, “Hey, I’ll be 23 when the year 2000 rolls around.” Since then it’s been mostly how I’ll make it to the next paycheck.

    My mom used to tell me all the time that she wished my kids would be just like me. My little C is and OMG is it stressing me the fuck out.

    Hope you’re doing well.October 29, 2016 – 6:17 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Gah to the Y2K stuff. I remember thinking it was going to be the end of banks and most of the world. Sorry about Little C but he’s going to be awesome in the ways that you are and he’s going to know more than you did about being like you because of you, if that makes sense. xoxooOctober 29, 2016 – 11:20 pmReplyCancel

  • My Inner Chick - I just adore clicking into your words, your insight…

    They’re a bit like a deep Indie film.

    And I LOVE! Love! love! xOctober 30, 2016 – 4:47 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - Hey First Best Mom! This is your writing at its finest, only I know that it doesn’t stop here. You’ll always continue to inspire.
    Sea monkeys do suck, don’t they?October 30, 2016 – 9:37 pmReplyCancel

I close my eyes, open my mouth, and let the almost-too-hot water shower my head, come together, fall, and rinse the night down the drain. I mine my thoughts, trying to remember my dream about removable magnetic teeth lined up perfectly once replaced. Straight, negative-to-positive on somebody’s gums. “That’s incredible!” I said. Wishing teeth were […]

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  • Lydia - Nice. Reading this Makes me feel grateful.October 13, 2016 – 9:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Lux - An easy or hard like is relative. What is easy for others might be difficult for some. I think it’s a matter of perspective. 🙂October 14, 2016 – 4:51 amReplyCancel

  • Linda Atwell - Out One Ear - Great thoughts, Kristi. Although life can be hard at times, I recognize too that even our hardest moments are probably not as hard as some other’s hard moments—especially if one lives in a third world country. We not only have white privilege (in my opinion), we have U.S. privilege too. We are lucky in so many ways….even when life is super hard. I feel more grateful than discouraged most of the time. (I also recognize that others living in the U.S. have it extremely difficult compared to me and I feel sad about that. I wish no one had to suffer. Ever.

    Happy Friday, Kristi.Thanks for making me think this morning. 🙂October 14, 2016 – 10:41 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I wish nobody had to suffer ever either. Sigh. And yeah, you’re right. We definitely have white privilege in addition to US privilege. I wish that weren’t the case. I mean, I wish everybody had access to fairness and equality and hot water and justice. xoxoOctober 14, 2016 – 7:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Corinne Rodrigues - Oh yes! My Dad is 91 and I sometimes wonder what he must make of how much simpler life is at so many levels.October 14, 2016 – 11:22 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - It’d be interesting to know what your dad thinks, Corinne. In some ways, I’d guess that life is less simple now than it used to be. Kids have so much to compare themselves to now you know?October 14, 2016 – 8:00 pmReplyCancel

      • Corinne Rodrigues - True. I guess people had lesser ‘needs’ then.October 14, 2016 – 10:21 pmReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - I think in some ways they were lesser, but in some ways, harder. Like if your kid was missing at 7pm, you had to resort to a phone chain or searching the neighborhood right? Not that when a kid is REALLY missing now that we have better but we have ways to stay in touch…October 19, 2016 – 11:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - I’ve been thinking about the people in Haiti too — I feel like what they are enduring has been brushed aside by the media because of all the crazy election news. They definitely have it hard, really hard. And speaking of calendar apps, I use my electronic calendar AND my paper calendar, because I am paranoid. I think I actually make it harder for myself though by keeping two calendars..I still mess up appointments all the time!October 14, 2016 – 12:31 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - LOL to messing up appointments all the time with two calendars! And you know, I hadn’t thought about it but I bet you’re right about the people in Haiti not getting the news coverage they would if there weren’t so much crazy election coverage. Gah. I’ll be glad when this election is over (as long as I get my way of course).October 14, 2016 – 8:03 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - We are so blessed. I don’t know if it’s national news but parts of NC are STILL flooding and people are STILL having to evacuate and many will STILL have no power for weeks because they can’t restore power until the floods recede. Unlike Haiti, no one has died that I know of but it’s all so awful for everyone. There’s snakes and alligator problems. Ick! I can’t even imagine.

    It’s been a long time since I’ve used a paper calendar. LOVE my app too and that my husband and I can share calendars. It used to be a pain when he used a blackberry.

    Love that picture of Tucker.October 14, 2016 – 8:08 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - We are so blessed. I can’t believe how much the news isn’t covering some of it here (or maybe I’m not watching right). Blackberries UGH. gross
      And yeah, I love that pic of Tucker too 🙂October 15, 2016 – 9:59 pmReplyCancel

  • My Inner Chick - **It’s about knowing that our own stories are important and worth telling**

    worth shading in yellow marker, dear.

    xxx love from MN.October 16, 2016 – 2:21 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - YOUR story is amazing. I’m so glad you’re telling it and helping so many people find help. <3October 16, 2016 – 7:43 pmReplyCancel

  • Allison - We are so lucky and life is easier (I guess😱?!?!) Thanks years past and compared to so many other on this planet – and yet we complain about how hard it is. So silly, and I’m so guilty. Would you believe I still keep a paper calendar? Drive s Rich crazy.October 17, 2016 – 5:29 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - LOL to your paper calendar driving Rich crazy but I get it. It’s actually easier to look at with it all laid out in front of you at once, unlike the iPhone app. True. I kept both for a while but was slacking and missed stuff on one but not the other… gah. And yeah I guess elastic and pants and apps make life easier but they also complicate life, you know? Like if this were the dark ages, we’d all have been in bed shortly after 7pm because it’s DARK and maybe we’re supposed to be sleeping. I dunno.October 19, 2016 – 11:36 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Nodding along to so many of the things you have in here. Absolutely.
    Can I tell you what makes my life easier? Truly? My husband. In so many ways. (I should probably write him a post.) And my Zilla. In some ways their contribution is grand and eloquent, and in others it’s just little everyday shit. But yeah, it’s them. Always them.October 18, 2016 – 1:25 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh Lisa! I should have said my husband! He really does make my life easier (he does almost all the laundry and that’s HUGE). I can’t believe I didn’t even think of them. GAH>October 19, 2016 – 11:39 pmReplyCancel

      • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Mine does most of the laundry too! So is it bad that I DID think of him and didn’t write that post? LOL.October 20, 2016 – 12:29 amReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - My pain specialist came and sat next to me once. We just sat in silence for a good 15 minutes before he said in his thick Indian accent,” It’s booooolshit you know. Dis. All dis.” and he pointed at my IV and the monitors I was hooked up to.
    I think he knew I needed to cry and punch the fuck out of things.
    So I cried.
    Then we talked about paint colours.
    I think it’s ok to feel bad about ourselves and our life. We are living the hell. Maybe that person who you are feeling bad for is looking at you and thinking “Jesus fuck, that poor person. They have it super bad”
    We need to give ourselves permission to feel. Then move.
    Yes, I am thankful for what I have and yes I am well aware that I have it far better than others – but sometimes man, I need to just say “damn it. this is boooooooolshit.”October 26, 2016 – 1:56 pmReplyCancel

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