Finding Ninee » Sharing our parenting and special needs stories with heart and humor.

The memory of music through the years

Scents and music have a way of taking us back like nothing else.  Passing a stranger who leaves behind a trail of RL Polo takes me back to the 80’s and the boy I thought I could love.  The one I thought I did love who never even saw me.

Phil Collin’s In the Air Tonight takes me back to the first boy I fell in love with for real.  The one who loved me back and later disappointed me in a way that 17 year-olds and 56 year-olds and everybody in-between and beyond will only know once they’ve been there.

Nina Simone’s Sinner Man takes me back to my first husband, because I first loved that song without him.  It takes me to the one I loved afterwards, who appreciated it.  It takes me to now, because I will always love Nina Simone.  Her voice is like no other.

Metallica’s One takes me back to concerts, waving my lighter, banging my head and feeling alive.  To this day, when I hear Metallica, I drive faster.  I live faster.  I remember.

Music takes me to places I’ve forgotten.  Ones I want to remember because remembering is one more thing that reminds me to be a better parent.  It reminds me of who I used to be.  It reminds me of who I want to be.

It reminds me of who I am.  It takes me to then, and it brings me to now.

It reminds me of the fact that even when it’s The Wheels On the Bus, that music affects us.  It touches us and it creates memory markers for us in ways that scrapbooks don’t.

As my speech and language delayed and maybe autistic son grows into his love of music more and more, I find myself searching for songs that I know he’ll love.  That will connect us through dance and drums and bopping our heads.  From the time that he was 12 months old, he’s loved Queen’s Bohemian Rhapsody.  Imagine my delight when my tiny little dude had such great taste.

Because of a recent simultaneous iPod and iPhone funeral, I found myself having to reload music from my library.  I didn’t do a great job and ended up searching for certain songs from my mobile devices on the road.  Which lead to saying “Yup! Buy!” when I thought I found what I was looking for.

I accidentally got a crappy cover version of Bohemian Rhapsody.  I think it was sung by The Muppets.

What I did find in awesome covers surprised me.  Who knew that Chris Cornell’s Billie Jean would have been more mellow and more awesome than the original?  Who would have thought that I would love Tambourine Man by both The Byrds and Bob Dylan?

Music is powerful.  It takes us back.  Sometimes to places that we hold onto with nostalgia and regret.

Other times, it takes us to places in the future.

Places in the sun filled with dance and song and head bopping.  Life.  Joy.

Sharing music with our children.  It takes us.  It means that maybe-probably autism doesn’t matter.  It connects us.  Forward and back and in between.

This has been a Twisted mix-tape Tuesday post brainchilded by Jen Kehl of Skew the Jen Mold.  The subject was Awesome Cover Songs.  She shared some good music with you tonight.

Feel free to link up.

DJJENNYtyedye    MCMomee-TuckTuck




  • Jen - You know that maybe/probably autism doesn’t matter. Tucker matters. i have to tell you that the first song Isaiah and I connected with was Mas Que Nada by Sergio Mendes. It was awesome!
    AND you want to hear an awesomely horrible cover of Tambourine Man? William Shatner. I kid you not. Horrid. Shoot me know.
    You are the awesomest co-host ever!May 14, 2013 – 12:45 amReplyCancel

  • Kristi - Jen! Holy cow wow wow. William Shatner did a cover of Tambourine Man?! NO WAY! Hahahh! That’s freaking scary and awesome and disturbing. I know that Tucker matters. I know that maybe/probably autism doesn’t. But thank you for the reminder. Hugely thank you.May 14, 2013 – 12:52 amReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - So true about music taking you on a trip back to the past, because I can hear a song nowadays and being instantly transported back to a time or even a moment that I heard it it in my past. And my girls love music too and Emma even had colic. The only song that would calm her and almost put her in a trance was Wham’s “Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go”!! I kid you not and can still see her with her little hands folded almost meditating listening to it as an infant in her Boppy Pillow.May 14, 2013 – 8:04 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Janine,
      That’s so adorable that she liked Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go! Awww!May 14, 2013 – 8:08 amReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Your links didn’t link anywhere, were they supposed to? I wanna check out the mellow Billie Jean. Just so happens I just listened to MJ’s Billie Jean on Pandora a few minutes ago. I’ll check youtube for Chris Cornell. Love the Tucker pic. He looks like he’s trying to snap his fingers.May 14, 2013 – 8:45 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Kenya,
      Yes, my links were supposed to go somewhere. UGH to the fact that I stayed up until 1:30 trying to fix them and I thought they worked! The names kept getting weird…guess I need to go back to the drawing board! UGH to IRL job!!! GRRR.May 14, 2013 – 7:11 pmReplyCancel

  • The Sadder But Wiser Girl - Now that’s funny, this post makes me think of a song-“I Go Back” by Kenny Chesney. 🙂 Don’t feel bad about the IPod music snafu-I’ve bought a few bad ones in my day too!May 14, 2013 – 8:59 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Sadder Sarah,
      Kenny Chesney, huh? That’s funny and by the way, Tucker LOVES him. Go figure.May 14, 2013 – 7:12 pmReplyCancel

  • nothingbythebook - I drive faster when I hear Metallica too! 🙂May 14, 2013 – 9:31 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Nothing by the book,
      YAY for Metallica fans!May 14, 2013 – 7:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Shay - This is so true! It’s crazy how music takes you back and suddenly you’re filled with nostalgia for how good things used to be and an appreciation for how awesome things have turned out. Thanks for this post, Miss Kristi–it was beautiful!May 14, 2013 – 9:32 amReplyCancel

  • Maggie Amada - Music is a universal language. Some scientists theorize that almost any species in the universe would be able to understand. I’m not sure I agree with that, but all humans certainly seem to react. I had a deaf friend in high school who could boogy down like nobody’s business because he felt the vibrations and he understood. I’m glad you have this means of connecting with your song.May 14, 2013 – 10:04 amReplyCancel

  • Hope - Your son is so adorable :). it’s amazing the way music and smells can be so nostalgic. My kids are only 6 and 3 but already, certain smells stop be dead in my track as I remember holding my newborn in my arms and wondering where the time went. Great post.May 14, 2013 – 10:13 amReplyCancel

  • Lori Lavender Luz - There is something transcending and transformative about music. In looking for a linky to add to this bloghop, I notice how many of my Music posts are also Perfect Moment posts. The right song can make any moment soar.

    Bohemian Rhapsody is one of those songs, for sure!May 14, 2013 – 11:04 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Lori,
      You’re so right that the the right songs can make any moment soar. I love how you phrased that and hope you find something to link up!May 14, 2013 – 7:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Joy - Sunny and I love music, too. Our music therapist just left some minutes ago and we had so much fun again. As I wrote in my wrap-up post for last week he is now totally into Mozart’s “Eine kleine Nachtmusik”. As soon as he hears it he is able to calm down and relax, regardless of how agitated he was just minutes before. Lovely post!

    PS: Yeah, Metallica!? I was such a huge fan of them, too! You know that I’ve written an entire blog post about “One”? Yeah, you do because you commented on it! Kindred spirits! xoxoMay 14, 2013 – 11:21 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Joy,
      I love how Sunny relaxes and calms down listening to Mozart. Tucker’s nighttime music includes that as well. And OMG I had forgotten about you being a Metallica fan! ONE is their Best. Song. Ever. Kindred spirits, indeed! XOXOMay 14, 2013 – 7:15 pmReplyCancel

  • Kate - I’ve never been a big music person but songs still remind me of people and times of my life.May 14, 2013 – 11:58 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Kate,
      It’s funny how songs remind us of times and people…even when we’re not huge music people, it’s like there’s a soundtrack anyway. Thanks for commenting!May 14, 2013 – 7:18 pmReplyCancel

  • Jean - Kristi, this was beautiful. I’ve always thought of my cooking being the thread that kept me connected to my kids when they move out of the house- music would do that too.May 14, 2013 – 12:11 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Jean,
      I love that your cooking is the thread that maintains your connection! 😀May 14, 2013 – 7:19 pmReplyCancel

  • Dani Ryan - I loved this!

    Music has this effect on me, too. It brings me back to another place and time.

    For Christmas one year, I bought my Mum 3 albums we used to listen to in the car when I was a kid, and I wrote her the memories each of them invoked in me. She loved it.

    And I love that your son likes Queen. Love. Love. Love!!!May 14, 2013 – 2:17 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Dani,
      Thank you so much! What an awesome idea to write your mom the memories of each album – I’ll bet she treasured that for a long time. And yeah, I love that Tucker likes Queen too!May 14, 2013 – 7:20 pmReplyCancel

  • LM@motherchuckler - I feel the same about Metallica-driving faster! LolMay 14, 2013 – 2:24 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - LM,
      YAY to Metallica! I have to watch my speeding actually!May 14, 2013 – 7:21 pmReplyCancel

  • clark - “Smells and music have a way of taking us back like nothing else.”

    That whole smell (scent sounds better) thing is as impressive as the music cues, that take us to another time, and it is that power to invoke the emotion of the time that is at once wonderful and scary.

    (I actually have ‘been careful’ with some of my favoriate music at times of predictable duress. I remember when Ola was sick, that I thought, ‘better not listen too much to the came songs, it could get attached’.)

    Great PostMay 14, 2013 – 3:25 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Clark,
      You are right – scents does sound better and I’m going to go edit now. Thanks for the suggestion. Wow, I never thought about NOT listening to certain things when somebody is sick – it would forever bring back those memories. You’re awesome. And thanks for linking up with us today!May 14, 2013 – 7:22 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerri - Very cool list. I remember head banging in the 80’s. Once so hard I hit my head on the steering wheel.May 14, 2013 – 3:55 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Kerri!
      Hahah that you hit your head on the steering wheel rocking out in the 80’s! That. Is. Awesome.May 14, 2013 – 8:04 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - My parents tell me that I used to bop to “I Can See Clearly Now” by Johnny Nash when I was a year old. My kids know that song as it was covered by the three blind mice in Shrek. I can really relate to your thoughts on the power of music, Kristi – it takes me back too!May 14, 2013 – 3:55 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Oh! I love that song! I’m embarrassed to say it but I clearly remember being about oh-maybe eight or nine? And loving Debbie Gibson. Gah.May 14, 2013 – 8:04 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - Well, of course I am in love with that photo of Tucker above…and yes, I love everything you said about music — it does connect us, it does bring us back for sure, and it does bring us to now too. (and by the way, I don’t know if you’ve looked into music therapy at all, but if he is musical, you might look into it if you haven’t already). I talk about music in my memoir…the band Journey was a big force for me in college, which is something I refer to in my memoir (which has flashbacks to college). Great post and really thought provoking too.May 14, 2013 – 5:34 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Emily,
      I only recently looked into music therapy – after Stephanie’s post about it. I got the name of somebody from a mom at Tucker’s school and just need to call. I want to read your memoir! Journey was awesome and I can picture myself driving in the car singing “Don’t Stop Belieeeeeeeving” at the top of my lungs. Thanks for that smile, I’d forgotten all about it.May 14, 2013 – 8:07 pmReplyCancel

  • Melissa@Home on Deranged - Such a cutie! (had to get that out of the way) Glad you’re back for the Twisted Mix this week. I never knew anyone had covered Billie Jean. But then, I never knew someone covered Bohemian Rhapsody, besides Wayne & Garth, natch.May 14, 2013 – 5:51 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Melissa,
      I’m glad I’m back for it too! Thanks. And actually the Billie Jean cover is really great! Time to go fix those links, I guess…sigh…May 14, 2013 – 8:07 pmReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - Music is my world baby. I completely understand what you mean about rekindling memories. Good. Bad. And all in between. When I was in the throes of postpartum depression, I remember the happiest moments were the ones where my son and I danced wildly in the kitchen to Raffi.
    I’m sorry the phone pooped out but keep an ear out on the radio and a notepad handy so you can remind yourself to download them.
    Do you use the iCloud?May 14, 2013 – 10:59 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Kimberly,
      So glad you visited and even more glad that you understand. I do use the iCloud – just happened to be in a spot where I hadn’t synched devices…sigh, I need to be more organized. And thanks for coming and commenting.May 14, 2013 – 11:48 pmReplyCancel

  • Menopausalmother - I love this post–you really took me down memory lane with this one! It’s true what you said–how a perfume can you take you back in time and so does music. I can listen to an old song and be instantly transported back to a first kiss, a date, or a day of heartache. And the coolest thing is to be able to share these good ol’ tunes with our kids. Sharing their appreciation of the music– priceless!May 15, 2013 – 3:25 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Menopausal Mama,
      Thank you for your awesome comment. Me, too, about being instantly transported back. Music is amazing and often brings forth memories that would otherwise be lost forever.May 15, 2013 – 7:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Anita @ Losing Austin - Music has the power to connect us across generations, abilities, nationalities… it has such healing power. I am definitely not a musician, but it speaks to me and helps me, and without it I’d be lost.May 15, 2013 – 7:12 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Anita,
      You’re so right – it really does have amazing healing power. I’m not a musician either, but there have been moments in my life that I’ve clung to music like a lifeline. Thanks so much for the comment!May 15, 2013 – 7:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Sara - Hey, didn’t get a chance to comment when this came out, but as far as covers go, I wanted a shout out to Eva Cassidy’s Fields of Gold, which better than Sting’s version and is up there as one of the best covers ever (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGwDYBWEDSc).

    Also, I was always keen on Melanie’s version of Tambourine Man (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8LwyOSyWpNg).

    Rock on, sistah.May 18, 2013 – 10:35 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi - Hey Sara,
    Love Eva Cassidy but wasn’t familiar with Melanie’s version of Tambourine Man – and wow, what a cool version. So different and haunting even. Thanks for sharing it with me!May 19, 2013 – 4:55 pmReplyCancel

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